Today, a woman was staring at me. This went on for about five minutes until I couldn't take it anymore. I screamed at her to cut it out. It turns out she had a lazy eye. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I went to the mall. While shopping in a store, a woman bumped into me numerous times. Getting annoyed, I turned to her and loudly exclaimed, "Are you blind?!" Turns out she was. FML
Blunder
Today, I was working at a portrait studio and was taking pictures of a little girl, I kept telling the girl to stop making silly faces when she smiles because her eyes go cross-eyed. After the third time I said it her mom grabbed the little girl and left. Turns out, she was naturally cross-eyed. FML
Today, I looked over at the car parked next to me and noticed a very large woman plucking her mustache. She locked eyes with me and kept plucking. After that, every time I looked over, she was still staring. Staring and plucking. Now when I close my eyes, I can still see her. FML
Today, a woman threatened to stab my eyes out because I wouldn't let her into the shop I closed and locked up half an hour ago. FML
You talking to me?
Today, I was on the train and a woman approached me from behind and told me that if I didn’t stop staring at her, she’d kill me slowly and painfully, then she pulled out a switchblade to support her argument. I wasn’t looking at her at all and was in fact looking in the opposite direction. FML
Today, while I was out shopping, a fairly hideous-looking woman stormed up to me and accused me of ogling her, saying, "As if I'd ever date you!" Less than a minute later, she'd somehow managed to bully me into falsely admitting to it and apologizing. FML
Today, as I was sitting on a bench thinking about an upcoming test, some hysterical woman slapped me out of nowhere because she thought I was staring at her ass. I was staring blankly into the void. FML
Today, an attractive woman looked in my direction and smiled. My wife saw this and stomped on my foot, and I screamed like a little girl from the pain. People turned and stared. FML
Today, and ever since I was born, I've had a lazy eye. This morning my boyfriend broke up with me. He thought it was funny to state that we just weren't looking at life in the same way. FML
Lunch is on me
Today, I was in the cafeteria when I noticed a new worker cleaning a table. As I passed her, she looked up and smiled at me. Thinking she was pulling a funny face, I jokingly crossed my eyes and smiled back. She looked hurt and continued working. Later, she served me my lunch. She was actually cross-eyed. FML
Top comments
Sebastian_NG 17
... #3 gets thumbed down
elpopsw 0
Did the ground swallow you and your paranoia up?
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Comments (81)
Snafuusmc 12
I'd love to stay and chat but your a total bitch.
iPeterPan 8
You're* >:-)
fayelouu13 0
Haha, I would of thought that she was staring at me too!-___-
supermattyboy 0
no 1 ever reply to me ;(
supermattyboy 0
what is op?
Kuqito 0
You deserved it for being an ass
The_Hitdude 12
56, in the time it took you to type this up and hit 'send', you could've Googled the definition and read a paragraph on it. Stop being lazy.
elinachka 7
A guy stared at me for like an hour in class, I just walked away, without screaming.......
droln4maltesers 8
YDI for being conceited and ignorant
kylelove 8
Why didn't you just ask her why she was staring at you?
smump 0
I don't know why there are so many YDIs I think that it would have creeped most people out. OP may not have considered her having a lazy eye because he was scared.
downtime 13
"Oh god, shes still looking at me, its been 5 minutes, this is the scariest shit ever..." Yeah, I don't think so. He's an idiot, he over reacts and makes himself sound like he needs therapy.