Today, a stoplight dropped square into the bed of my pickup truck. The police think I was attempting to steal it, and my insurance won't cover the damage to my truck. There were no witnesses. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was driving in my very own car that I bought and paid for myself, when I stopped at a stop light. Then I noticed the truck in front of me turn on his reverse lights. I honked desperately. He hits me, looks out the window and says, "I see no damage" and drives away. FML
Today, a truck rear-ended my car and drove off. I could see everything from my office, everything except his license plate. FML
Today, for the second time this week, a jerk in a big truck let a big rock fly out of their uncovered back and damaged my windshield. Both times the cops refused to do anything and I can't afford to fix it as I was demoted at work. FML
Today, I parked my truck next to a rather large SUV at school, went to class for 8 hours straight, came back and found my passenger side door crumpled from where they had backed out and hit it. They left a note on my window that said, "Sorry about your truck, but I don't have insurance." FML
Today, I had the lovely experience of witnessing a tow truck cause a couple thousand dollars' worth of damage to my broken-down car. FML
Today, I crossed the street at a crosswalk and someone in a big pickup truck swerved to try to hit me. This has happened to me multiple times. FML
Today, I accidentally rear-ended an undercover police car. FML
Today, I got into an accident. As I was talking to a police officer about what happened, the tow truck driver managed to take my car and drive away, leaving me with no phone or wallet. I just spent an hour walking home in a hail storm. FML
Today, I was on my bike. As I'm rolling through an intersection, some asshat in a pickup runs the red light and hits me. Instead of getting out and helping me, the guy hops out, takes a look at me lying in the street, steals my hat and drives off. That was my favorite hat. FML
Today, my dad was helping my fiancé and me move. On the way, someone sideswiped the trailer. When the police came, we found my dad had a suspended license, no insurance, and a broken tail light. No one else could drive a manual, so we were stuck in a parking lot for 3 hours. Thanks, dad. FML
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Top comments
Silentstrike 11
Give them some donuts, you will then be helped. Merry Christmas
baseballplaya5 7
And how exactly did that happen?
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Comments (106)
ninjuh_wingman 29
Dont you just love how life has a strange sense of humor?
captainfalcon7 0
Who would even want to steal a stoplight?
StillSinging9594 0
I would... If I knew I wouldn't get caught haha. Sounds fun ;)
deviable 9
If there were no witnesses, then they can't prove you stole it.
ohSNAPyall 27
Right, which is why OP wasn't charged with a crime.
perdix 31
Is your name Earl?
iRuleUdrool 4
Residential areas usually have stop signs, not lights.
docscientist 10
Should've had Allstate.
deadxmau5 6
Like a good neighbor state farm is there.....with a traffic light
ohSNAPyall 27
Way to go, Cool Hand Luke.
BAMitsnikki 8
Who the **** pressed YDI?O.O
ArielTheMermaid 17
No witnesses, huh? Maybe just explain what happened?
Llamacod 11
Uhh, he tried that and they don't believe him
kurlyfries222 0
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