Love: Today, a really hot guy smacked my ass. I farted. FML

By Anonymous - 01/03/2010 22:04 - United States

Today, a really hot guy smacked my ass. I farted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 724

You deserved it 10 924

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Same thing different taste

By sydneybourgeois - 13/08/2011 04:06 - United States

Today, the guy of my dreams told me he liked me and leaned in to kiss me. Just as our lips touched, I ripped a big ass fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 510

You deserved it 16 142

By anonymous - 15/01/2012 05:58 - United States

Today, my crush grabbed my butt while I was walking up the stairs. In surprise I farted. He won't even look me in the eyes now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 559

You deserved it 7 667

By ECullen - 21/05/2009 19:13 - United States

Today, I was talking to this guy that I like a lot and I think he likes me back. When he told me I was beautiful I laughed so hard that I farted. Loudly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 725

You deserved it 24 971

By byebyeromance - 26/08/2014 01:03 - United States - State College

Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 299

You deserved it 5 062

By couldntholdit - 12/07/2011 17:09 - United States

Today, I was hanging out with a guy that I really like. When he gave me a hug goodbye, he slid his hand into the back pocket of my jeans. It was glorious until I farted on his hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 368

You deserved it 23 960

An attempt was made

By bubblewrap - 20/10/2015 10:13 - United Kingdom - Swindon

Today, I noticed a guy checking out my ass in the mirror behind the bar where I work. He was cute, so I thought I'd put on a little show. I bent over to reach for something near the floor, which caused me to let rip a series of uncontrollable farts, like popping bubble wrap. He quickly left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 771

You deserved it 11 915

By Stinky and Single - 06/08/2015 23:14 - United States

Today, I was sitting in a secluded corner of a coffee shop and felt extremely gassy. Thinking I'd be safe, I let out a pretty nasty smelling fart. Next thing I know, a cute guy is approaching me and asked my name, but all it took was for him to inhale once and he bolted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 756

You deserved it 6 674

By john - 28/01/2009 23:02 - United States

Today, the girl who I have had a crush on for 2 years snuck up from behind me and gave me a hug. I farted very loud at the same exact time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 834

You deserved it 5 154

By Dramaqueenfornothing - 27/04/2016 22:32 - South Africa - Cape Town

Today, while being intimate with my future husband, I reached over to stroke his cheek. The light behind him cast a shadow over my chest, and it scared me so much, I screamed then I farted on him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 345

You deserved it 2 811

By Wowsers. - 30/01/2010 08:47 - United Kingdom

Today, I was woken up by my own fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 801

You deserved it 35 997

JackRocksSoSuckI 0

Tuesday 2 March 2010 1:01

lol haha that's funny

bustyboi 0

Tuesday 2 March 2010 1:03

that blows!

Comments

Asheanao 0

Tuesday 2 March 2010 4:42

Gigalawl.

seeimdee 0

Tuesday 2 March 2010 4:45

you kinky bitch! now stick my finger in your asshole while I quote mcbeth! (;

Mikeymikey 4

Tuesday 2 March 2010 4:50

mmh.... i suggest you put a mask and gloves on!! because the Shit will definitely hit yr Fan!! :D LOL at OP..

Pearljammer001 0

Tuesday 2 March 2010 4:46

lmao @ this conversation; gangrape*. "well, I don't know if I should be flattered or scared" f***ing priceless.

ThatsMyHerpesBoy 0

Tuesday 2 March 2010 4:56

well atleast he smacked

KayleeFrye 39

Tuesday 2 March 2010 5:01

When some guy thinks he's allowed to smack my ass, I take that to mean that I'm allowed to smack his face. It's only fair, really. I don't care how hot the guy is, it's disrespectful and rude.

blades4glory 0

Tuesday 2 March 2010 5:07

haha thats must of been super embarassing :-X

mccarson8 0

Tuesday 2 March 2010 5:07

thats effin hilarious!!!

dipsetgirl26 0

Tuesday 2 March 2010 5:09

Omfg Lol thats ******* funny

EyeAmSurreal 0

Tuesday 2 March 2010 5:10

buahahaha!

J0yce 0

Tuesday 2 March 2010 5:15

Epik Failness.

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The Top

Today, I was sick during the night and had to puke. I had no bucket or trashcan nearby, so I ended up puking on the floor. However, because it was so dark, I didn't notice my cat lying in the exact spot where I puked. She was not amused, giving me the mother of all death glares before she started puking herself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 432

You deserved it 122

Today, after having sexual intercourse with my boyfriend, we went downstairs to find his parents had come home early and had heard everything. I then received a long scolding from his mother of how I'd disrespected her house. My boyfriend received a high-five and a thumbs-up from his dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 028

You deserved it 5 459

The Top

Today, it was my friend's paintball party and we were doing it in a forest nearby. When I arrived at his house, his parents said they already started, so I geared up and went out there to find that there was a note on a tree. It said 'Sorry', and then twenty people jumped from bushes and ambushed me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 387

You deserved it 12 323

Today, my class had a debate about religion. My classmate said that Christians couldn't be circumcised because "only Jewish people are". Without thinking, I said it isn't true because I'm Christian and I’m circumcised. I accidentally gave the whole class a mental picture of my dick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 285

You deserved it 1 229

Today, my girlfriend dumped me for another guy. Last week, she wrote sweet things like "Love you forever" and "Light of my life" on my arm cast. I have to wait two more weeks until it's taken off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 024

You deserved it 3 914

I agree, your life sucks 12 345

You deserved it 2 811

Today, I told my parents that all I wanted for my 18th birthday was to go to a restaurant in NYC for a nice dinner. My parents said no, because it would cost too much money. I came home to see my parents had bought a huge TV for $800. We already have 3 televisions. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 885

You deserved it 4 360

Today, I told my conservative friends over dinner that I was a bit of a liberal. They then went off on me about how liberals are lazy, stupid, and a financial burden on society. I was the only employed person at the table with a college degree and not living with my parents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 380

You deserved it 373

Same thing different taste

An attempt was made

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