Today, a girl from my college, who's been following me around for months, finally asked me out. Not being interested, I politely declined. Now she's convinced everyone that we hooked up and that I have an incredibly small penis. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I walked behind a girl I hooked up with last weekend while she was on the computer in the library. I noticed she was looking at my Facebook page and got excited. Then I heard her say to her friend, "This is the one with the smallest dick I've ever seen." FML
Today, I asked out this girl I've been spending a lot of time with lately. She told me she was only hanging out with me because she thought I was gay and wouldn't try to get in her pants. FML
Today, I asked out the girl I really like. She turned me down, saying that she's a lesbian. That'd be fine, if I were a guy. FML
Today, I finally built up the courage to confess my love to the girl of my dreams. She turned me down. When I asked her about all the recent receptive behavior toward me, she replied, "I thought it'd be funny." FML
Today, I was hooking up with a girl, but when she got my pants down, she got mad and left, saying she was gonna kill her sister who lied to her about me having a large penis. FML
Today, I have such crippling low self-esteem that when a girl from my class asked me out, I was instantly convinced she couldn’t actually be interested in me and must be setting me up for some sort of nasty prank, so I told her I wasn’t going to fall for it and to fuck off. She started crying. FML
Today, I met up with a girl I've been hanging out with a bunch recently. She said that we should be a couple, "unless you have a micropenis", then laughed. I actually do have a micropenis. I couldn't hold it together, and ran out of the bar, crying. FML
Today, my friend told me she saw the girl I like at a single's night after I'd asked her out and rejecting me, for being in a complicated relationship. FML
Today, after three weeks of putting it off, I decided to ask out the girl I've had a major crush on since third grade. When I told her, she smiled, but then quickly said, "But aren't you gay?" FML
Today, I finally got up the nerve to ask this really cute girl out I've had a crush on for over eight months. Turns out she isn't a girl. FML
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Top comments
BauerMegan 31
Some people just can't handle rejection.
slooby_fml 25
Prove them all wrong
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Comments (119)
Jjimen1654 9
You could; A) show people your penis B) hook up for real with a girl and shell set the record straight C) spread a rumor saying that the girl and you were about to hook up bout you saw how ugly she looked naked and couldnt get hard thus keeping you soft and flacid even retracting a little giving the illusion that its small. Just go with A its the easiest.
Snowkeys 11
Male or female is irrelevant. How trustworthy the source of the rumor is what spreads them.
beautycrush495 10
Never piss off a bitch that stalks you
yeongji 31
Bitter much? As for whether or not this is a FML, it depends on what happened during the past few months. If you led her on, YDI. But if you did not lead her on, then it is a FYL.
nite66 21
If you want revenge, start saying her ****** is just too loose
aeonsoul 12
okay that chick got issues. Preemptive strike that loca and get a restraining order
TheChillyBoy88 6
How do rumors survive in college You either have irrational fears, or that's a SMALL college.
rosenkrieger223 24
I think it'd be a little more than "semi-awkward"....
diceddiamonds 11
Get her back, say she has an STD.
chosha_fml 27
Next time you see her in public tell her loudly that it's a shame she can't handle rejection, but if she pathetically needs to lie in order to deal, you at least hope that warns the next guy she chases that you were right to say 'no' when she asks you out.