By Ashley - 7/10/2013 06:11 - United States - Belmont
Today, a friend thought it would be funny to shove me over; I faceplanted. I was going to say "F*ck you" and "I will kill you". It came out as "I will f*ck you." He's still laughing. FML
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  Dracoboxer357  |  35

And here I thought a Freudian slip was when you said one thing but actually meant your mother....er, another! ;P
Either way, if that was literally Op's reaction to getting a face plant, she could probably expect to end up doing the downward facing dog pose more often. :p

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  oj101  |  33

#44 - I can just imagine it as a TV show. Set on a rainy background, during sunset, city lights on in the background, OP says, "I'm gonna f*ck you.... (breathlessly).... up". Then OP's friend proceeds to smile, leans in slowly and kisses her. OP passionately kisses back, then suddenly draws herself away with a sharp breath, with a momentous pause. She then hesitantly smiles, grabs his hand and they run off into the twilight to get back to her apartment, in a moment of fiery passion.

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  \  |  28

OP should keep his word and fuck his friend. Hard. In the butt. No lube. Unexpectedly.

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  CallMeMcFeelii  |  13

Though there are some guys out there named Ashley, I do believe OP is a woman. She could do it with a strap on though. Nothing scarier than a pissed of chick swinging around a 10 inch rubber dick. That's a nightmare situation, or for some, a dream come true haha.

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  junkman6  |  22

I am really bad at internet things. In the past 2 days I've googled "candy crush" and now "hentai." I don't know which is going to scar my brain more... I'm thinking candy crush.

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  \  |  28

Hey #107, did you know you were born exactly one week after the day of Hitler's birthday, the day of the BP Oil Spill, and the Columbine High School massacre all together?