Today, a drunk driver crashed in through my living room wall. Not only that, but he managed to completely miss the first two houses on the block, which should have been a barrier before mine. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was staying at a seedy apartment. A group of drunken idiots next door decided it would be fun to run into the wall simultaneously. They broke through the rotted wall and ran me over. FML
Today, some unprovoked drunk asshole tried punching a hole through the windshield of my car. While I was driving it. FML
Today, I woke up to find the entire driver's side of my car wrecked. Front door, back door, front and rear bumper smashed to shit. A drunk driver had hit it the previous night and ran. Don't worry though, he stopped and left his insurance information. He keyed it into the undamaged side of my car. FML
Today, while trying to prove how easy it would be for a burglar to break in, my drunk dad threw a brick at my window. Luckily, he missed. It hit the wall and bounced off. Unluckily, it bounced off, landed on my wife’s car, broke the windscreen, slid off, and put a long scratch down the bonnet. FML
Today, a drunk driver drove his car through my mailbox. He got pissed, started yelling, and threatened to sue me for "putting the mailbox in the middle of the road". If my front lawn is a road, I'm going to have some serious issues. FML
Today, I drunkenly staggered home and crashed on the couch. When I woke up I realized it wasn't my house. FML
Today, I was having my birthday party. My dad showed up late, blind drunk, and drove his car straight through my garage door. FML
Today, the day after I bragged about never having a car accident in my life, I mistakenly put my car into Drive instead of Reverse and crashed into my own house. FML
Today, I got into a car crash, in my own garage. FML
Today, a drunk crashed a truck into my porch. Shaken up, I was glad to see that so many of my neighbors had gathered around to comfort me. When the dust settled, I noticed my remaining porch furniture was missing. They weren't consoling me, they were casing the place. FML
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Top comments
perdix 31
I hate when people write FMLs asking for our sympathy by wishing bad things on others.
StoryOfTheYear 15
Good aim
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Comments (182)
Mebekatya 0
so instead of just being grateful you and no one you love was hurt or killed you are whining about the drunk not hitting the other houses? I've never seen any houses act as barriers for other houses....they're all lined up on the street...so stop whining, collect your insurance money (if you were smart enough to have it) and take the drunk to court to pay for damages the insurance might not cover...hooray for suing him for all he's worth!!!
lcon86 0
haha. this is definitely believable in Indiana.
YouSuckAtLove 0
i think the driver purposely aimed for your house. Thats what you get for painting your walls pink.
mikey0505 0
you punched him in the head right? he's drunk and you could have said he's lying he's a drunk
WJCool 0
well call allstate r u in good hands????!!
jbonzi 0
how could anybody honestly say that this was deserved? WTF is wrong with people!
brianjman14 23
Because he wanted the other two houses to get hit and possibly have someone die all in order to protect his own house?
boopityboppity 11
He deserved to have his house destroyed because he didn't want his house destroyed?
Emrysa 1
He doesn't deserve much sympathy, because he's upset that it didn't happen to one of his neighbors houses instead. That makes him a prick. A bigger example, for the people who don't get it, what would you think if someone said, I wish my house hadn't been destroyed by Hurricane Katrina, why couldn't it have have destroyed some other area in Florida or along the east coast instead? They usually get more hurricanes. Why the hell would someone say that instead of just saying it sucks that my house was destroyed.
ShatteredDreams8 0
its the fact that it specifically hit his house when there were two next to it. its more of the fact that it was unlucky rather that it being about not being him
emilylolo 3
He said the other houses should have been a barrier to his... Like he expects others to take it instead of him
StitchedBear 0
well you can make him pay for all that damage OP, stoping complaining and take that drunken ass to court
boatkicker 5
Yeah, he'll get the money. But it isn't just going to instantly show up the moment he decides to take this guy to court, and in the mean time, he has to live with a gaping hole in his wall. He is perfectly entitled to complain.
Babushka_Homyak 10
You know, if OPs took your advice and stopped complaining, this would turn into MLIA. Goodness.
to3_tag 0
hope he has good insurance...and a good lawer
perdix 31
I hate when people write FMLs asking for our sympathy by wishing bad things on others.
brianjman14 23
I know, right? If he had just left it at the part where the guy crashed into his wall, I would feel bad for him.
brianjman14 23
I was going to say your life sucks, but **** you for wanting it to hit the other houses, OP. What if there were children in there and he ran over them? **** you, OP. I bet he was aiming at your house because he knew you're an asshole.
DocBastard 40
Who pissed in your corn flakes? OP isn't wishing anyone gets hurt. He's just wishing someone else's house was damaged rather than his own. If this happened to you, would you honestly say, "Thank goodness he hit MY house! How lucky!"
Emrysa 1
I agree with the main comment, what if he were wishing it were your house instead? OP is a dick, if it happened to me, I'd wish it hadn't, but I wouldn't be upset because it didn't hit someone else. I mean really?
MarcusMachete 0
I don't think OP was saying he wished it had hit one of the other two houses. pretty sure it was more of a "damn my luck, he passed 2 houses and mine just HAD to stop his." you people are dicks except the first person who replied to this fag's comment.
TheNewGuy03 29
i would have wished that the drunk driver crashed into air. i know, it's impossible, but wishes do come true, right? [by the way, to me, it doesn't seem as though op is *wishing* that the drunk juggernaut crashed through someone else's living room wall. i believe he's implying that it is anomalous for the guy to have missed the other two houses and to have hit his own. any other assumption would make the dude psychic and a dick, because he would have had to know a drunk driver was gonna crash into *someone's* house.] playing devil's advocate here; op could very well be a bona fide penis. |the kid|
boatkicker 5
@73 in response to "what if there were children in the house and he ran them over?" What if the house is empty? OP never said it was anyone's home. Would you really rather have a car hit your house, than an empty one? I doubt it. What if OP has children, and his neighbors don't? Would you prefer to have your children living in a home under construction? We can play the "what if" game all day, but it's entirely unproductive. OP didn't say he wished that children got hurt. I don't think it even said he wished for anyone's house to get damaged. He was remarking on how surprising it was for him that his house got hit, even though there were two between his and where the car started. And he was noting how unlucky it was for his house to get hit. And it is unlucky for someone to hit your house, no matter where you are or what you neighbors are. We don't know anything about OP or the houses next door. He's not an asshole by default. We need more information, before deciding that.