Today, my favorite necklace fell off at school. Later, I saw... - FML

By Kurliez408 - 6/6/2017 12:45

Today, my favorite necklace fell off at school. Later, I saw another girl wearing it. When I told her it was mine, she accused me of trying to steal it and that it was a gift from her sister. I might have thought she had an identical necklace, except I hand-made mine. FML

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Kurliez408 Say more :

OP here! I really enjoyed (most of) those comments! This actually happened about 10 years ago xD I did call her out on it and told her I hand-made mine. She reluctantly handed it over, which she wouldn't have done if it was REALLY from her sister! For those saying I could've shown a picture- again, 10 years ago haha. Phone cameras were pretty crappy and less popular. Plus I only had the necklace for about two weeks. All's well that ends well and let the stealer go sulk to her friends!

Crowded House

Does it taste good?

Or he's just becoming an old goober

By shadowmuppet - 31/3/2017 20:00 - United States - Bronx

Today, I learned the joy of getting a brand new leather jacket and then watching my date drunkenly throw up all over my arm. FML

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By Anonymous - 7/9/2015 15:49 - United States - Bradenton

Today, I was sitting in a bar telling some young dude to accept responsibility for his life choices. I'm over 50 and was spending my last five dollars on beer. FML

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By letdown13 - 3/4/2013 16:50 - United States - Binghamton

Today, my husband told me to look for a honeymoon resort, since we had to cancel it last year. I looked everything up and got all excited. Just when I asked him for payment information, he said "April Fools!" April Fools was two days ago. FML

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By shygurl434 - 15/3/2010 09:14 - United States

Today, the boy I like finally acknowledged me. He came up to me and uttered two words: "Nice pooper." FML

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By Anonymous - 13/11/2019 05:00

A beautiful truck decoration

Today, someone threw a sausage roll in my truck, but I ignored it because I was about to start a 2 day round trip. 6 hours later, I stopped for coffee. I have seen that it was a massive dildo, the ones with a suction cup on the base. The suction cup had stuck the massive dildo in the door for 6 hours and 200 miles. FML

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By TooFlamingHot - 14/1/2016 02:08 - Australia - Ashfield

Today, I arrived at the kennels I work in to find the power disconnected and the water pump off. This meant I had to bucket water and carry it to keep over sixty assorted dogs and cats alive in temperatures over 90 degrees. The moment I finished, the power came back on. FML

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By blehh - 14/4/2009 20:40 - United States

Today, I had horrible pains in my stomach area so I went to the doctors. They couldn't find anything wrong and sent me to the Emergency Room for X-rays. After spending the entire day in the hospital, they tell me I'm slightly constipated. I had to pay $400 to find out I had to take a shit. FML

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By Anonymous - 14/2/2017 04:53 - United Kingdom - Birmingham

Today, my girlfriend left me. I have no clue what to do with the holiday we have booked or the ring I was going to propose to her with on Valentine's Day. FML

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By happyturtle - 1/9/2013 09:57 - Croatia

Today, my friend told me she turned down a job as a babysitter because she didn't want to be secretly videotaped, as she knew the people had a nanny cam. I wasn't aware of this when I took that same job a few nights ago and asked my boyfriend to come by. We had sex on their couch. FML

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By Anonymous - 18/2/2012 12:16 - United States

Today, I realized that my fiancé only touches me when he wants to have sex. Any other contact is purely accidental. FML

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By supervisor - 6/11/2009 03:43 - United States

Today, at work I wrote up my boyfriend (whom I've been secretly dating, because I'm his supervisor) for being $40 short on his register. Our policy is to write up anyone short over $10. He got mad and told my boss we're dating, and I was instantly fired. Then I got dumped for being a "tattle-tale". FML

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By secretsant4 - 3/11/2017 14:00

Today, at an 8 a.m. spin class, I knelt on the floor to set up my bike. The bike next to me was too close, and while the girl on it was pedaling to warm up, she pedaled down hard onto my heel, breaking my ankle. FML

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By Anonymous - 22/11/2010 19:52 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of over a year looked at me and said, "Sometimes I just want to hit you." FML

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By Jammy238 - 1/2/2010 05:27 - France

Today, I was taking my dogs for a walk, then it started to rain, and the wind went mad. I ran for cover in the trees near a bridge, slipped and fell into a river. I was soaking wet and my boots were full of water. Then to get back out of the river, I had to use stinging nettles as hand holds. FML

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By PinkMonkeys - 23/11/2016 18:33

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me by sending me flowers that said, "I just need some space, forever. I hope I never see you again, even if you were a great person. It's not you it's me." FML

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By Ringless - 25/2/2010 21:47 - United States

Today, my fiancée and I were selecting our wedding cake. The wedding is now off since I refused to buy her the "dream" wedding cake she wanted because it was chocolate. She called me childish and cheap. I'm highly allergic to chocolate. FML

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By SoggyPancakes - 11/3/2009 19:49 - United States

Today, I decided to call my wife while she was having a private lunch with my parents. I began to tell her all the nasty things I was going to do to her in bed. Halfway through my fantasy, she giggled and told me that she was going to take me off speakerphone. FML

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By Kim - 10/4/2009 07:12 - United States

Today, I got back a paper after a peer review. I had worked really hard on it over the last week and was proud of the end result. When I got the paper back the only positive comment on the paper was "well I really like the blue staple you used to hold it together." FML

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By shit.jpg - 25/8/2015 19:22 - United States - Waban

Today, a fifth grader gave me a note from his "father" excusing him from PE. It was riddled with spelling errors and shockingly poor grammar, so I rejected it as a blatant fake. Several hours later, I was informed by his very angry father that it wasn't actually fake. FML

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By Anonymous - 19/9/2009 01:32 - United States

Today, I was driving through a neighborhood and saw a "slow down, children" sign. I was nice and slowed down as I passed a couple little kids with their parents outside watching them. I guess I was going too slow because one of the fathers started chasing me down the street calling me a pedophile. FML

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By Anonymous - 11/5/2020 05:00

Battery

Today, at work, I was talking to a colleague about what the worst pain he ever experienced was. He said his was being bitten by a dog, and I said I didn't know. Next thing, I was kicked in the balls from a behind by another work colleague. She said, "What about that?" I agreed, it was. FML

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By Anonymous - 17/11/2013 13:34 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have our first kiss with each other, but my dog decided to let one rip, stinking up the whole room. My boyfriend still doesn't believe it was my dog who did it. FML

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By Heidi Jeanette - 14/11/2017 01:30

Today, I learned that my insatiable appetite and sex drive is because I'm 5 months pregnant. I'm married to a woman. We had a threesome one drunken night. FML

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By in_hardik - 11/6/2012 01:14 - United States

Today, at my workplace, I saw a system crashing. I mean literally, my manager was throwing my colleague's laptop at him while shouting around the office. This is only my second day. FML

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By bootycall:( - 15/2/2017 13:00 - United States - Oxnard

Today, I went on what I thought was my fifth date with a guy. We finally got intimate and it was amazing. As soon as it was over, he said : "Sorry babe, I should get going. I have a date tomorrow and I'd hate to be tired for it." FML

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By kimbo - 25/10/2010 08:28 - United Kingdom

Today, I woke up and had a flick through my camera photos. To my disgust my mother had taken pictures of herself, drunk out of her mind, naked with goggles on in our hot tub. FML

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By ThreeHoursEarly - 24/1/2020 01:00

What's the time, please?

Today, I was told to be present for a meeting that started at 5pm. I arrived 15 minutes early, and I was late for the meeting. This happens regularly. FML

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By Xpresss - 2/2/2009 10:39 - United States

Today, I came into work with a new hair cut and so far everyone has asked me If I lost a bet. FML

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By Anonymous - 14/8/2019 14:00

Today, I was sitting in my room when my dad came in to ask if I wanted the rest of his cake. I'd made it for my cousin's wedding, and spent 2 days preparing it. The wedding is tomorrow. FML

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By tamponface - 30/7/2011 12:03 - United Kingdom

Today, I was really excited because the girl I'd liked since freshman year asked me out. She came to my house and my mom decided to show her baby pictures of me with tampons up my nose because I'd had a nose bleed. Even worse, there was one picture of me when I was 15 doing the same thing. FML

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By madison77 - 21/11/2011 23:26 - United States

Today, my engagement ring was seized by the police, and my fiancé was arrested on larceny charges. Both in the same visit. FML

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By Anonymous - 6/9/2017 07:00 - United States - Eugene

Today, while showing off the sharpness of my new katana, I missed my target and hit my shoe. The strike cut into the second toe of my right foot, which then had to be amputated. Demonstration successful. FML

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By SorryUncleTommy - 1/10/2012 04:23 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, it was my uncle's funeral. I wasn't very close with him, but I still wanted to be respectful. My boyfriend, being the jackass that he is, was singing the Spider Pig song from The Simpsons under his breath while making his fingers walk up my leg, trying to get under my skirt. FML

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By dmvfail - 15/9/2011 00:13 - United States

Today, I went to the DMV for my second attempt to get my license. I did everything perfectly, stayed at the speed limit, did my three-point turn flawlessly, and parked nicely. The lady failed me because I wasn't using the stick shift right. My car doesn't have a stick shift. FML

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By Anonymous - 17/11/2018 17:30

Today, my boiler packed up on me just as the weather has turned cold, with no money to have it fixed. Hello to a week of freezing cold showers. FML

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By Bearwaitressities - 15/2/2017 21:00 - South Africa - Durban

Today, whilst working my waitressing job, I had a patron lose his rag at me because there was too much "green stuff" in his salad. What did he expect? Chicken? FML

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By angela - 9/4/2020 23:00

Busted!

Today, I went to a party. Although I wasn't drinking, I was still afraid the cops would bust me. Halfway through the party, the cops showed up. I tried to hop a fence, ripping my pants and cutting my leg in the meantime. It wasn't until was on the ground that I found out there was a gate. FML

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By cunting cunts - 29/5/2012 17:10 - United Kingdom - Northolt

Today, I was driving home, when some kid on a motorbike shot in front of me from the pavement, almost running me off the road. When I confronted him, he screamed, "Watch where you're going next time!" If I could flush every last one of these human turds from the toilet of life, I would. FML

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By MLS - 14/2/2009 23:19 - United States

Today, I wore the belt that my stepfather has spent 2 months needle pointing, as a finishing touch he added my initials: 'fml'. FML

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By Dominic - 14/6/2009 19:14 - Canada

Today, as a prank, my friends put a big bucket of water on my door so that it would spill on me as I exited my room. It would have been funny if I hadn't been holding my $900 laptop as I was walking out. FML

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Top comments

By Emma1562 | 33

#7465325 - Sunday 4 June 2017 20:04

What a fucking bitch. I'd take it to the principle.

By Patsy Boren | 19

#7465332 - Sunday 4 June 2017 20:19

Fuck that. Call her out on it and tell her it was hand made. If that don't work, then kick her ass and take it back

Comments

By Emma1562 | 33

#7465325 - Sunday 4 June 2017 20:04

What a fucking bitch. I'd take it to the principle.

Reply

RichardPencil | 28

#7465354 - Sunday 4 June 2017 21:11

PrinciPAL.

I'd normally let spelling mistakes go, but with this word, it's a matter of principle.

Reply

Hippo_Holiday | 19

#7466013 - Tuesday 6 June 2017 8:19

Yup your principal is a pal

By Lobby_Bee | 16

#7465330 - Sunday 4 June 2017 20:10

Call that bitch out and fight her. Sometimes violence solves problem and this is the time.

Reply

Hippo_Holiday | 19

#7466014 - Tuesday 6 June 2017 8:20

Not the best idea right now, but just imagine doing it instead of really literally doing it

By Patsy Boren | 19

#7465332 - Sunday 4 June 2017 20:19

Fuck that. Call her out on it and tell her it was hand made. If that don't work, then kick her ass and take it back

Reply

pjsr | 32

#7466437 - Wednesday 7 June 2017 6:08

Who's to say OP doesn't get her ass kicked, and not get the necklace back? Just because you're right doesn't make you a good fighter.

By 1DisGR8 | 32

#7465334 - Sunday 4 June 2017 20:22

Something like this happened to me with a pair of headphones. I lost them then found some girl wearing them two months later. I knew they were mine because they had different sized buds and they were an off-brand set. I couldn't get mine back but I hope you can get your necklace back OP

By RichardPencil | 28

#7465352 - Sunday 4 June 2017 21:08

Maybe her sister copied you? They say, "Good artists copy; Great artists steal." Either her sister is a good artist or the girl is a great artist.

Reply

Bman54 | 19

#7465437 - Monday 5 June 2017 0:34

Or, you know, the infinitely more logical explanation is it's the OP's.

Reply

RichardPencil | 28

#7465442 - Monday 5 June 2017 0:46

Are you trying to cut me with Occam's Razor?

Reply

Madrias | 36

#7465488 - Monday 5 June 2017 6:45

Nah, she's just a con artist.

By ChristinaIsFood | 13

#7465364 - Sunday 4 June 2017 21:41

Would've smacked that bitch

By Etweens96 | 24

#7465366 - Sunday 4 June 2017 21:44

Got any pictures of you wearing it or making it?Show the principal, have her called out and make her give it back and tell the principal

By bobsanction | 16

#7465399 - Sunday 4 June 2017 23:01

Maybe her sister stole it then gave it to her.

Reply

Kurliez408 | 32

#7465511 - Monday 5 June 2017 8:39

haha maybe! but she was wearing it only a few hours after it fell. I think she was just using it as an excuse to get me to back off :P

By Tartara | 14

#7465422 - Monday 5 June 2017 0:05

I'd find a picture of you wearing the necklace -if it's your favorite you probably have at least one- then after telling her it was hand made, take it up with the principal if she doesn't give it back. A quick Google search would reveal you can't buy it because it's hand made, and obviously it's yours because you have a picture with it.

By chyiochan | 30

#7465453 - Monday 5 June 2017 2:13

Steal it back when shes not looking. What is she going to do, say you stole it?

Or get the school to call your parents. Find a picture of you wearing it. I'm sure your parents would know of your favorite necklace.