Today, a drunk driver crashed in through my living room wall. Not only that, but he managed to completely miss the first two houses on the block, which should have been a barrier before mine. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I was staying at a seedy apartment. A group of drunken idiots next door decided it would be fun to run into the wall simultaneously. They broke through the rotted wall and ran me over. FML
Today, some unprovoked drunk asshole tried punching a hole through the windshield of my car. While I was driving it. FML
Today, I woke up to find the entire driver's side of my car wrecked. Front door, back door, front and rear bumper smashed to shit. A drunk driver had hit it the previous night and ran. Don't worry though, he stopped and left his insurance information. He keyed it into the undamaged side of my car. FML
Today, while trying to prove how easy it would be for a burglar to break in, my drunk dad threw a brick at my window. Luckily, he missed. It hit the wall and bounced off. Unluckily, it bounced off, landed on my wife’s car, broke the windscreen, slid off, and put a long scratch down the bonnet. FML
Today, a drunk driver drove his car through my mailbox. He got pissed, started yelling, and threatened to sue me for "putting the mailbox in the middle of the road". If my front lawn is a road, I'm going to have some serious issues. FML
Today, I drunkenly staggered home and crashed on the couch. When I woke up I realized it wasn't my house. FML
Today, I was having my birthday party. My dad showed up late, blind drunk, and drove his car straight through my garage door. FML
Today, the day after I bragged about never having a car accident in my life, I mistakenly put my car into Drive instead of Reverse and crashed into my own house. FML
Today, I got into a car crash, in my own garage. FML
Today, a drunk crashed a truck into my porch. Shaken up, I was glad to see that so many of my neighbors had gathered around to comfort me. When the dust settled, I noticed my remaining porch furniture was missing. They weren't consoling me, they were casing the place. FML
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Top comments
perdix 31
I hate when people write FMLs asking for our sympathy by wishing bad things on others.
StoryOfTheYear 15
Good aim
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Comments (182)
britasif27 5
I would be so sad! but at least you will get insurance money (:
thepirate19 3
how can so many vote he deserves it. that's messed up
ironic_quote_her 0
lol what can i say people have improved at drunk driving. sheesh look what the police have driven us to missing the first two houses *tsk tsk* lol jk.
Bartimaeus 7
WTF who said Ydi?! How did anyone deserve that? There are so many haters on this site... lol
ttav36 0
sue him?
Costa2315 0
OHYEAHH! * like the cool aid man*
seximexi911 10
holy shit. what are the odds huh. wonder how much money you will get, milk it dude. lol
Lils123 0
Sounds like the koolaid man.. "OH YEAAA"
teacher411 0
You're complaining that he didn't hit somebody else's house? Wow. You should be happy no one was hurt.
MaJiN_fml 2
pro