Work: Today, a customer at the Walmart I work at had a hissy fit and...

By ohgodwhy - 27/11/2012 23:46 - Canada - Brampton

Today, a customer at the Walmart I work at had a hissy fit and began throwing merchandise everywhere, including at my face, because we are Canadian and don't have a show called "Extreme Couponing" for "devoted shoppers" like her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 304

You deserved it 1 802

Work

Mother of the year

Weird reason to leave, but OK

Nutshot

By mother to an ugly doll - 04/09/2013 18:10 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, my car window got smashed, because someone somehow confused the doll my daughter always leaves strapped into a carseat for an actual kid. It's a cabbage patch kid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 677

You deserved it 4 074

By Anonymous - 11/02/2010 13:33 - United States

Today, I was babysitting. The kid said he had to use the bathroom. When I told him to go ahead, he said he just did. He was on my lap. He wasn't wearing pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 468

You deserved it 7 877

By Jfly25 - 23/01/2018 01:30

Today, while on my way to work, I had a tire blowout. I got the car towed and borrowed my mom’s so that I could still get to work. Her car seized and died on the expressway ramp. It’s not in any tow truck’s jurisdiction. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 006

You deserved it 285

By TooInnocent - 07/07/2016 17:44 - United Kingdom - Sheffield

Today, I was told that I was no longer being considered for the Prison Officer job I have been interviewed for, because a social media check showed I had liked a picture of drugs, so my character is inappropriate. I thought it was a picture of candy. I've never even tried weed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 909

You deserved it 2 199

By Anonymous - 25/05/2013 04:50 - United States - Clifton

Today, I locked my keys in my car. Good thing I went to Lowe's to make spares, which are also now locked in the car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 561

You deserved it 18 299

By Anonymous - 24/02/2015 15:10 - India - Tuticorin

Today, my fiancé and his family accused me of being with him only because he's rich, refusing to go ahead with the wedding. I accepted his marriage proposal 4 years ago, when he was penniless and unemployed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 082

You deserved it 2 944

By Rrae - 25/02/2019 02:00

Today, I'm at the ER for my first ever UTI and potential other "down there" issues. Yesterday I got married. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 151

You deserved it 233

By MovingOut - 16/01/2015 01:21 - Saint Vincent and the Grenadines

Today, my parents grounded me because I refused to do my little sister's homework for her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 978

You deserved it 2 484

By Anonymous - 05/12/2018 08:00 - United States - Wauseon

Today, a police officer stopped me and told me he got an anonymous tip that I was going to kill myself. I wasnt. Protocol says he had to bring me straight to a hospital where I explained that someone was messing with me. nobody listened. Now I have a hospital bill for $2,250. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 609

You deserved it 159

By cheesy grin - 11/06/2018 19:00

Today, my front tooth randomly fell out in the middle of class. I brush regularly and visit the dentist, the tooth was perfectly healthy looking, and it didn’t hurt beforehand or bleed. It literally just fell out for no reason. Now I have a gap grin and I don’t know why. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 946

You deserved it 209

By Keyser Soze - 17/01/2017 09:56

Today, I was cleaning out the cabinets under my kitchen sink and I farted with such force that my dog thought someone was knocking at the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 587

You deserved it 1 003

By notgreg - 10/11/2009 15:59 - United States

Today, I found out my neighbor ordered parking tickets for everyone on the block. My car was 4 inches into his driveway, but not obstructing his exit in any way. That didn't stop him from calling in, on a Sunday, at 8 AM, an 88 dollar ticket. He also left a note "Your parking sucks, love, Greg." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 556

You deserved it 10 410

By Anonymous - 18/12/2008 04:32 - United States

Today, I was jacking off casually to a picture of my ex-girlfriend, when all of the sudden, my friend sends me an IM picture of a granny bending over which pops up on my screen. I think my sex life is ruined forever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 632

You deserved it 32 469

By jigglypluff - 19/11/2014 05:27 - United States - Omaha

Today, my wife and I decided to try out role playing. She ended up having an anxiety attack when I said she wasn't turning in her homework. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 144

You deserved it 4 910

Shitty prank

By Crohn - 03/07/2021 04:01

Today, when I woke up, I discovered that someone thought it'd be hilarious to set up an obstacle course of boxes and furniture in the dorm hallway. I have Crohn's disease, and the bathroom is at the other end of the hall. No, I didn't make it in time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 808

You deserved it 44

By ValeyFallsAlot - 14/01/2011 14:18

Today, I fell down a flight of stairs. The guy behind me was kind enough to ask if I was okay. He then called his friends over so they could laugh at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 835

You deserved it 2 982

By thatsucks - 17/05/2009 17:42 - United States

Today, I realized that my father's weekly unemployment check is more than my bi-weekly pay check. My full time job pays less than my father's unemployment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 997

You deserved it 5 148

By Yudith - 27/02/2017 12:00 - Canada - Montr?al

Today, I discovered a cold sore in my ear, which I need to treat with a cream. Because of health issues, I already have six different creams and lotions to apply to various parts of my body, including buttcrack and hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 572

You deserved it 641

By . - 16/10/2013 21:05 - United States

Today, I convinced my father that "Juanito", our relative who needed money for immediate surgery in Mexico was a stranger attempting to scam him. I was $1400 too late. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 273

You deserved it 4 032

By Anonymous - 08/04/2011 15:30 - United States

Today, I finally found a reason to quit smoking. I threw my cigarette butt out the window and it blew back in, went down the back of my pants, and burnt my butt in 3 different places. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 905

You deserved it 54 201

By mandieee - 15/06/2017 20:00

Today, I had my first shift as a server at a restaurant after getting stuck behind an accident and arriving late, apologizing profusely. Apparently no one knew I'd been hired but I was still yelled at for tardiness. They then made me clean a fridge for 4 hours and paid me in pizza. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 172

You deserved it 371

By addie19 - 19/01/2010 19:25 - United States

Today, I found out the antibiotics I'm taking can cause you to vomit unexpectedly. In the car. While driving. To work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 668

You deserved it 2 919

By Anonymous - 08/08/2014 21:05 - Israel

Today, I finally felt ready for intimacy with my boyfriend, and I sent him a sexy picture of myself topless. He texted back, "Ewwwww." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 742

You deserved it 8 625

By itisthedude - 10/09/2009 23:17 - United States

Today, I was walking with my very attractive friend who I like a lot. She then told me that her roomate wouldn't be home tonight, and if I wanted, I could come over and study history. I didn't get it. I told her no thanks, that I was covered, and it was chem I needed to study. An hour later, I understood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 790

You deserved it 76 507

By laterchoice - 02/10/2010 04:22 - United States

Today, my girlfriend informed me that she is still in love with the guy she cheated on me with. She admitted that she would be willing to do anything with him if he wanted to. And, "He's a better kisser too." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 114

You deserved it 5 254

By Anonymous - 25/06/2015 18:29 - United States - Newark

Today, I was notified I'm being discharged after 2 weeks because my employers don't have the time to train me at my first real job in 6 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 028

You deserved it 1 944

By HP_22 - 01/12/2009 16:17 - United States

Today, I was the only employee at a video store where I work when it got robbed. After crying, shaking and spending two hours and dealing with the police, my boss called and told me it was good experience and I would know what to do next time, then made me finish my shift, the night shift, alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 626

You deserved it 3 275

By cat-astrophic - 25/02/2015 15:44 - United Kingdom

Today, after 3 years of studying to be a veterinarian, I found out I may not be able to continue. It's not because I'm failing my classes, but because my body has developed an allergy to cats. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 025

You deserved it 2 829

By Holland - 04/04/2019 12:00

Today, my check engine light came on. I took my car to the dealership, to be told it wasn’t an issue, and I would be fine to drive and use my car normally until my appointment in 4 days. Four hours later, my car won’t start 45 minutes from home. I guess a $200 tow bill means I wasn’t fine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 973

You deserved it 153

By anonymous - 11/04/2011 03:26

Today, we had a tornado warning and I told my parents I loved them, just in case. My dad just said "see you in Kansas". FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 235

You deserved it 8 242

By he's a dawk, and a cunt - 05/07/2013 22:29 - Australia - Darling Point

Today, my boyfriend and I went to my parents' barbecue. He knew my family is extremely religious, so what did he do? Called for silence to make an announcement, namely: "God isn't real." Cue a riot that ended in us being kicked out and me all but disowned for "putting him up to it". FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 966

You deserved it 8 053

By Anonymous - 03/07/2013 16:25 - United States - Iowa City

Today, I was on a movie date with my boyfriend, when he asked for a handjob. I thought I was doing well until he sighed, took my hand off, and said he could finish on his own. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 559

You deserved it 18 587

By Anonymous - 01/10/2012 23:19 - United States - Topeka

Today, my roommate thought it would be funny to throw a brick down the laundry-chute. Guess who spent the night at the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 393

You deserved it 1 731

By Tucker - 08/02/2010 19:29 - United States

Today, I woke up with a hangover from last night. Last night, I snuck out and went to a party at a club. To hide my hangover, I cleaned myself up and walked into the kitchen to get a drink. My mother looked at me and said, "What's that on your wrist?" I'd forgotten I'd left the wristband on from the club. I'm already grounded. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 468

You deserved it 48 252

My body, my choice

By Anonymous - 16/09/2020 15:01 - Canada - Red Deer

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be a good idea to drink several shots of vodka after taking a pill that makes you sick when you drink. She puked all night and then blamed me for making her sick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 317

You deserved it 137

By Anonymous - 14/09/2018 03:30

Today, I finally found out why I got a D in a class last semester. It was a heavily attendance-based class, and apparently he only marked you present if you participated in class discussion. It was a 100-seat lecture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 796

You deserved it 315

Overreaction much?

By Anonymous - 04/10/2014 15:17 - Denmark

Today, my allergies flared up and I started sneezing. I guess my girlfriend was having a bad day, because she lost her shit and started telling me how annoying I am and how I can never do anything right. I'm not sure if we're still a couple, because she stormed out and won't answer my calls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 912

You deserved it 3 309

By ahuman - 29/09/2013 05:10 - United States

Today, I saw two kids having a fistfight in the street. I ran over to stop them, and one ended up hitting me in the eye. I now have a black eye over what turned out to have been a fight over who was going to get the last slice of pizza. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 697

You deserved it 9 740

By Sad Sally - 24/04/2012 11:22 - United States

Today, a therapist told me that I was too depressed to attend his depression group meetings. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 617

You deserved it 2 958

My husband the shitgibbon

By NotYetThanks - 23/07/2021 00:01

Today, three weeks after a traumatic emergency cesarean section, my husband keeps sulking because sex is the literal last thing I want right now. The fact that my body is still sore and healing is apparently irrelevant when he is horny. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 320

You deserved it 118

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Top comments

Right_in_Two 5

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Wednesday 28 November 2012 8:43

Did you tell her to grab her shit and get out?

Harpy20 24

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Wednesday 28 November 2012 8:49

She's already at Walmart. Can't really get any cheaper than that.

iamananglophile 18

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Wednesday 28 November 2012 8:42

Canadians are weird, bro.

BadAsCactus 7

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Wednesday 28 November 2012 8:43

The customers always right... Jks kill them

Right_in_Two 5

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Wednesday 28 November 2012 8:43

Did you tell her to grab her shit and get out?

SpikyG 3

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Wednesday 28 November 2012 9:03

She deserve to be beaten.

sens3sfailing 24

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Wednesday 28 November 2012 9:21

14-assault is a little, okay, VERY extreme. Throw her out, ban her from the store, have her pay for any damages she may have caused, but physical abuse isn't deserved.

Harpy20 24

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Wednesday 28 November 2012 9:23

14- is someone a little bitter? You wanna talk about it...? [patronizing tone should be obvious.]

sens3sfailing 24

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Wednesday 28 November 2012 10:04

3-off topic here, that dog in your profile picture is freaking adorable. That is all. *still wants to pet the puppy really badly*

Izabushel 65

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Wednesday 28 November 2012 10:11

I know! 3 and 5's puppies could get together for a play date. Edit- just read 5's puppy ran away :(

starburst7596 14

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Thursday 29 November 2012 0:44

Apparently you guys have never been told the stereotype of Cabadians being overly polite.

KindaFunnyRight 8

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Thursday 29 November 2012 3:21

88- sorry I haven't… do you mean Canadians?

dafuqdidihear 11

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Thursday 29 November 2012 3:58

Too bad Cabadians don't exist.

Right_in_Two 5

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Thursday 29 November 2012 7:48

37-Yeah, I was somehow able to have him sit still for the picture. xD

dmoz 7

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Thursday 29 November 2012 12:33

You get a thumb up for the Jeff Dunham reference!

starburst7596 14

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Friday 30 November 2012 8:21

Seriously guys? I accidentally put a b instead of an n. Calm the crap down!

cjack188 13

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Wednesday 28 November 2012 8:44

And that my friends is one of the perks to working in customer service (says I in a sarcastic voice).

pickles1994 18

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Wednesday 28 November 2012 12:08

Meh, I work at Walmart and Customer Service can be just as bad if not worse at times. Edit: Oh I see you were being sarcastic.

loserboii 11

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Wednesday 28 November 2012 8:45

She sounds devoted to making the employees go crazy.

Harpy20 24

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Thursday 29 November 2012 7:04

Donuts make her go nuts.

xWhackedPanther 18

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Wednesday 28 November 2012 8:46

Wtf seriously aw

onlychildFTW 33

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Wednesday 28 November 2012 8:46

That's such a stupid show.

BenL97 5

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Thursday 29 November 2012 7:42

Who doesn't want/need 30 gallons of soy sauce for only 13 cents?

Harpy20 24

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Wednesday 28 November 2012 8:49

She's already at Walmart. Can't really get any cheaper than that.

sens3sfailing 24

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Wednesday 28 November 2012 9:28

Incredibly true. My home is 15 minutes away from the 2nd largest Walmart in the world only behind one in China and my mother worked there part time for a few summers (she's a teacher so yeah) and she said how they always cut all these corners getting lower quality stuff so they could sell them for less and still make huge profit. I will never buy anything but food from there because its the only thing that's untouched, but still cheap.

Harpy20 24

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Wednesday 28 November 2012 9:36

Well luckily for us, my husband and I are military [may have contributed to my lack of humor xP], so we get to shop tax-free on base. Pretty awesome since I'm still earning degrees which are incredibly overpriced :S

onlychildFTW 33

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Wednesday 28 November 2012 9:41

Military discount in the USA is 50% on parts at Mercedes Benz dealerships. FYI for everyone with a Mercedes and buying dealer parts.

Harpy20 24

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Wednesday 28 November 2012 9:48

28-I doubt I'll ever rock a Benz. I will not be THAT person. Besides, I love my VWs :)

sens3sfailing 24

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Wednesday 28 November 2012 10:08

Lucky! I'm from New York State so I have to deal with the fucking ridiculous taxes her. We usually go to Massachusetts for cloths shopping if we can though. Oh and thank you for your service!

onlychildFTW 33

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Wednesday 28 November 2012 10:10

How much is your tax? Here it's 13%. Nova Scotia is 22% I think.

Harpy20 24

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Wednesday 28 November 2012 10:14

We debated asking for a base on the NE coast because I love it there, but my husband hates snow. The taxes there are insane. Of the times I have been in the area, I have NEVER shopped there. And I'll definitely pass on the thanks :)

Harpy20 24

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Wednesday 28 November 2012 10:17

44- holy shit! I have a friend in Halifax. I never knew it was so expensive! I used to live in FL and it was around 6% there. Not much higher where I am now, about 9%

onlychildFTW 33

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Wednesday 28 November 2012 10:26

I believe it is Nova Scotia. I could have it mixed up with one of the other Atlantic provinces. I know one of them is (22+/-2)%

ksuth 25

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Wednesday 28 November 2012 13:26

Tax here in NS is 15% hahah.

Prolux_fml 23

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Wednesday 28 November 2012 15:31

Hah! Alberta's tax is 5%!

onlychildFTW 33

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Wednesday 28 November 2012 18:07

That's because Alberta has no pst. You guys with all your oil and stuff. But I've never seen an Alberta city #1 most livable city. ;)

sens3sfailing 24

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Wednesday 28 November 2012 19:02

im not sure of the exact number. but I know it is near one of the highest tax rates in America, but I believe California has the highest. and I am going to school 30 minutes away from the canadian border. I have family that lives even closer and they always shop in Ontario because of how much cheaper it is.