Today, a bunch of guys at work chased me down a corridor with a Febreze spray for smelling like I'd been "sleeping in a hollowed-out horse's carcass" and having "the personal hygiene of a billy goat." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had to train a new guy whose body odor was killing me. After he'd left, I had to run two industry size fans to blow the stench out of my office. FML
Today, I realized that I'd run out of deodorant. On top of that, I was late to work so I had to run, making me all sweaty and smelly. To cover it up, I used the air-freshener in the toilet at work. Everyone recognized the "Lemon Tree" scent and now all of my colleagues think I'm a cheap bastard. FML
Today, I found out I’m the “smelly girl” in the office. Now I understand all those passive-aggressive subtle comments about hygiene and showering made by my coworkers, and why a bottle of Dial body wash randomly appeared on my desk one day. FML
Today, I was running late for work and grabbed what I thought was my deodorant. Turns out, it was my husband's foot spray. Now I'm at the office smelling like a combination of roses and athlete's foot. FML
Today, I had to walk through the women's perfume section to get to my normal aftershave. A woman was trying out a perfume, which she squirted on herself and me. You can imagine the afternoon I had to endure after I got home to my wife and she could smell "some slut's scent" all over me. FML
Today, my coworker friend told me she was going to the restroom. Soon after, I did the same. Once in the stall, I could smell a stench emanating from the next one. I yelled, "Ew, you stinky bitch" and sprayed air freshener under the partition. As I left the stall, my friend walked into the restroom. FML
Today, I'm so chronically sleep-deprived that I sprayed a bathroom air freshener under my arms instead of my deodorant. FML
Today, my boss held his polo shirt one inch from my nose and asked me to smell it. He said that he was going into one of our tenants' apartment and wanted to smell him before and after so I could judge said apartment's cleanliness. FML
Today, we had an emergency lockdown in my gym class. As a result, we had to go into the boys' locker room, so naturally, it smelled like a fart in there. Some dumbass had a "brilliant" idea to spray a WHOLE FUCKING CAN OF AXE SPRAY in the locker room. I have asthma. FML
Today, I found out that someone had peed into the bottle of Febreze that we keep in the dorm bathroom. I found this out when I sprayed it onto my coat to get rid of a weird smell. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
RebornProblem 0
Maybe you should take a shower more often.
saIty 17
Psh febreze can't help you now. You're going to need to pull out the big guns. Yup I mean soap and water.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (117)
LaurenLeung96 15
S'okay dude, shower in cat piss, I'm sure it'll tone down the... horse carcass?
caitiebug1119 15
If your body odor is enough to start a manhunt with Febreze, you need a shower. Seriously though, by that point there's no shame in asking to borrow a bar of soap and some shampoo if you need to. Take a sponge bath in the bathroom sink if you have to. When I was younger, my cold water pressure was pretty much nonexistent; the cold water on full blast was a little teeny stream. Taking showers and baths hurt like hell and it took forever to wash clothes in cold water, but we womaned up and bathed as often as we could stand it. I know from experience there's no sense in letting it get that extreme.
AngelGoneWrong95 9
That's grody!
lucasjames22 8
Good god...take a damn shower. I would be mortified.
lucasj23 11
ewww. that is so gross. I would be so embarrassed. what's wrong with you?
TheSentinel05 11
I’m guessing you showered twice, wore copious amounts of deodorant, brushed your teeth and rinsed with mouthwash, and still stank. That’s what I always assume with these types of FML’s.