Work: Timing

Timing

By iliterallypoopedmyself - 19/01/2012 01:54 - Australia

Today, I anxiously waited 8 hours for an important phone call. The phone rang while I was sitting on the toilet. FML

agreeclassic 30 782

vote type 1 3 889

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By phonesnshit - 29/05/2010 04:04 - Canada

Today, I was expecting a very important work call. Today was also the day I got insuppressible diarrhea. As I was running to the washroom, the phone rang. I didn't make it to the washroom or the phone. FML

agreeclassic 31 226

vote type 1 3 498

By Anon - 25/08/2015 10:10 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, I took a phone call in the bathroom, since the rest of the house was too noisy. I sat down on the toilet and waited while they put me on hold. After a while, I must have forgotten the lid was down and my pants were still on, because I started peeing myself. FML

agreeclassic 21 651

vote type 1 9 155

Thanks dad…

By Anonymous - 26/09/2012 20:27 - United States - Fort Lauderdale

Today, I was on the toilet, when the girl I really like decided to call. I'd left my cellphone in my room and my dad answered. All he said was, "He's taking a shit. This might take a while." and hung up. FML

agreeclassic 29 660

vote type 1 2 616

By number2 - 18/10/2011 01:14 - United States

Today, while sitting on the toilet, my phone pocket dialed my boss's cell. He was in the next stall. He answered. FML

agreeclassic 34 449

vote type 1 4 043

By birdisnottheword - 11/03/2015 13:55 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, the phone rang while I was on the toilet. I asked my 3-year-old daughter to answer it, only for her to loudly say, "Mommy's on the toilet pooping." FML

agreeclassic 29 949

vote type 1 8 904

By needanewphone - 22/01/2012 22:03 - United States

Today, while I was getting ready to take a shower, I placed my phone on the counter next to the toilet. While I was washing my hair, someone called me. My phone was on vibrate, so I didn't hear it until it vibrated off the counter and into the toilet. FML

agreeclassic 18 933

vote type 1 32 361

By ShitHappens - 24/10/2011 05:04 - United States

Today, while on the phone with my boyfriend, I really needed to poop. Badly. He was in the middle of telling a story, so I figured I could get away with muting the phone while on the toilet. Halfway through, he suddenly went silent. I forgot to mute the phone. FML

agreeclassic 13 573

vote type 1 44 743

Hurry up

By lauren_rox - 08/11/2009 17:50 - Canada

Today, I was waiting at home for a phone call. While I was in the bathroom, the phone rang. I quickly stopped my business and ran out of the bathroom with my pants round my ankles. I leaped over the couch, tripping and then stubbing my toe while hopping to the phone. It was a telemarketer. FML

agreeclassic 25 446

vote type 1 13 716

I'm up here

By Pooped - 21/11/2022 17:00 - United States

Today, apparently my parents called 911 because I wasn't answering their phone calls, so they thought something was wrong. I was in the bathroom and didn't bring my phone, so I wouldn't distract myself and ended up sitting there forever. Looks like that wasn't the right choice. FML

agreeclassic 985

vote type 1 138

By Poopie - 29/01/2011 06:06 - Canada

Today, after suffering from constipation for three days, I finally took a dump. Just as things reached the point of no return, my land line and doorbell all rang. FML

agreeclassic 28 237

vote type 1 3 223

Victoria16_fml 0

Thursday 19 January 2012 8:54

I guess your shit outta luck

music_woman1 11

Thursday 19 January 2012 8:53

The worst time for that to happen

Comments

verkaderk 9

Thursday 19 January 2012 13:30

Cordless FTW!!!

BlueHue 0

Thursday 19 January 2012 13:38

I used to wait by the phone, then I got a cordless phone. Now my phone waits by me. :)

crzybtchxx 2

Thursday 19 January 2012 13:48

Lol should have taken the phone with you and stopped mid what ever to talk lololol

Indipringurl 0

Thursday 19 January 2012 13:59

Thatz why you take the phone wit u duuh

badam_fml 6

Thursday 19 January 2012 14:20

Cell's can be taken everywhere

dethbunny 0

Thursday 19 January 2012 14:57

Sittin' on the toilet!

oakland43 6

Thursday 19 January 2012 15:05

pinch it off

Clamcreepy 7

Thursday 19 January 2012 15:42

There she's blows!

screamo_neve 12

Thursday 19 January 2012 15:46

That's usually what happens. Actually happened to me yesterday... :o

CrankDatAsss 4

Thursday 19 January 2012 16:26

Do you not have a cordless phone that you can walk around with... or your cell maybe?

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Today, my fiancé broke it off with me on our 3-year anniversary at 12:01 a.m. on Thanksgiving morning. Guess who gets to go to family gatherings where everyone will be asking where he is. FML

agreeclassic 12 911

vote type 1 881

Today, I found out that when I go on Medicare in January, one of my medicines will go from $45 per month to $3000 for the first month, then $425 per month for the rest of the year. I need this medicine to stay alive. FML

agreeclassic 6 509

vote type 1 357

Today, I was at the grocery store with my five year-old son when I had to go to the bathroom. After doing my business and we started walking out of the bathroom, my son loudly announced to the whole store, "Mommy has diarrhea!" FML

agreeclassic 33 670

vote type 1 4 443

Today, my boyfriend and I were looking at engagement rings. When the store owner asked about our budget, my boyfriend said with a straight face, "Nothing too expensive, I have a big penis so I don't have to overcompensate by buying a big diamond." FML

agreeclassic 40 470

vote type 1 7 443

Today, I'm suffering with an acute and weird form of misophonia. I get irrationally triggered and angry whenever I hear someone say words and phrases like, "at a level that nobody's ever seen before", "radical left", "like you wouldn't believe", "nobody’s ever seen anything like it", and "drill baby drill." I need professional help. FML

agreeclassic 241

vote type 1 457

Today, I caught my little brother peeping at my friend getting dressed in the bathroom. When I asked him what he was doing he said "I'm just doing what Ray does to you while you're in the bathroom." Ray is my new step dad. FML

agreeclassic 139 865

vote type 1 5 459