Kids, Relatable, Parents and Teenagers: The war on drugs - FML

The war on drugs

By Anonymous - 29/09/2022 12:30

Today, my dad caught me vaping. From the volume of his yelling, you’d think he caught me sniffing cocaine out of a prostitute's ass crack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 436

You deserved it 1 159

Kids Relatable Parents Teenagers

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Same thing different taste

Ironic

By Anonymous - 20/03/2022 16:00

Today, my dad yelled at me for using legal marijuana to help treat my potentially terminal cancer, which is kind of hypocritical for the man who spent significant portions of my childhood in jail for selling cocaine to rich high school kids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 225

You deserved it 92

By hypercrite dad - 19/09/2014 18:34 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad found out I recently tried weed. He called me a useless waste of air and grounded me for the rest of the year. Then he went outside and smoked his third cigarette of the morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 119

You deserved it 15 532

By Anonymous - 22/04/2015 13:39 - United States - Columbus

Today, my dad sat me down and angrily accused me of doing drugs, all because he's noticed I've recently become a lot more energetic and emotional than usual. The truth is, I'd been smoking weed daily for 3 years and just decided to never smoke it again 2 weeks ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 793

You deserved it 6 042

By bbbeast - 28/07/2009 02:42 - United Kingdom

Today, my dad asked me if I'd started smoking, I gave him a big speech about how I never have and never will. Two hours later, he found my stash of cigarettes under my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 979

You deserved it 136 228

Crisis control

By Cuntlette - 11/04/2014 16:38 - Australia - Brighton

Today, my dad hit his mid-life crisis. When I came home and said hi, he told me to shut up, then went to the living room. He then lit up a cigarette and started muttering about having to put up with me, then went into a coughing fit, because he's never smoked before in his life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 554

You deserved it 3 367

By wah wah "you raised him" - 22/04/2014 18:59 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I walked in on my son holding a lighter to the end of a pen and sniffing the fumes. Apparently he thought it would get him high. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 781

You deserved it 5 264

By =( - 15/02/2015 14:52 - Australia

Today, once again I tried to convince my dad to stop smoking. And once again, while I was speaking, he lit up a cigarette and smoked until my asthma flared up and I was wheezing so hard that I had to leave the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 763

You deserved it 4 157

By Anonymous - 26/01/2016 03:44 - United States - Arcadia

Today, my grandma saw me putting some mints in my mouth when she walked by my room. Instead of confronting me, she told my dad I was doing drugs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 704

You deserved it 1 287

By Anonymous - 21/09/2013 04:07 - United States - Mccomb

Today, my mom found my dad's hidden stash of cigarettes. He told her they were mine and now I have to spend two hours at therapy for my "smoking problem" every weekend. I've never smoked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 165

You deserved it 3 520

Digging it

By blech - 08/12/2014 23:08 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I witnessed my dad rummage through his nostrils, thoughtfully examine the contents, and flick them nonchalantly onto the carpet. All of this he did with the biggest demented grin on his face. Sadly, this has become a regular occurrence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 754

You deserved it 2 557

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Top comments

WhataStrangeTripThisIs 23

Thursday 29 September 2022 13:29

How old are you? Just curious because it does make a difference if you are dependent or not. Once I became an adult I did very little to appease my parents. My life, my choices, if I fall on my face well then maybe I had a lesson to learn.

mattiagardin 15

Thursday 29 September 2022 12:37

Yeah he's right. Many things are unhealthy, you should at least look cool doing them

Comments

macone 30

Thursday 29 September 2022 12:34

Sniffing cocaine would at least be cool.

mattiagardin 15

Thursday 29 September 2022 12:37

Yeah he's right. Many things are unhealthy, you should at least look cool doing them

Anderling 32

Thursday 29 September 2022 12:50

At least we understand the risks of cocaine and a baggie of white powder is unlikely to explode with zero provocation.

WhataStrangeTripThisIs 23

Thursday 29 September 2022 13:29

How old are you? Just curious because it does make a difference if you are dependent or not. Once I became an adult I did very little to appease my parents. My life, my choices, if I fall on my face well then maybe I had a lesson to learn.

RichardPencil 30

Thursday 29 September 2022 16:03

"What the **** is wrong with you, kid?? You snort the blow from between her *******!"

Hangryko 27

Thursday 29 September 2022 18:31

You want to smoke at home, do so when you move out.

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The Top

Today, was my wedding day and I had been preparing my speech for my husband for about 3 months. At the wedding, I poured my heart out to him. Did he do the same? My husband forgot about it and right before the wedding, took his from his first marriage and changed the name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 057

You deserved it 4 181

Today, my mom ambushed me with my cheating ex-fiancé, thinking being in the same room would miraculously change the past and we’d get back together. When I tried to walk out, my mom screamed like a banshee and latched onto my leg. After this I’m putting her in a retirement home and never visiting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 902

You deserved it 83

The Top

Today, I was walking down the stairs holding a glass of water, when I tripped. I don't know what hurts more, that I'm still picking glass out of my hand or that my mum is still ranting about the water I'd spilt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 795

You deserved it 2 743

Today, I realized I have helicopter parents. They monitor my phone and don't let me have social media or get apps without their permission, give me a screen time limit, and snoop through my texts whenever they want. Then they expect me to trust them. I feel like my house is a prison. FML

I agree, your life sucks 836

You deserved it 316

Today, after getting up to press snooze on my alarm clock, I climbed back into bed. When I went to reach for the covers quickly because I was cold, I missed, yet still managed to pull back my fist with force punching myself in the face. I now have a bloody fat lip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 926

You deserved it 12 962

Today, I started work as the head engineer for a big civil engineering project. I met the rest of my team, in particular the environmental engineer who I'll need to get along with the most. As it turns out, I took her virginity when we were freshmen in college. She still thinks I'm an asshole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 999

You deserved it 38 237

Today, I got a phone call from my husband in jail. He was detained for statutory rape. The girl was his 15 year-old coworker at McDonald’s. He’s 42. I can’t tell which is worse, the fact that we have a daughter the same age, or that he actually wanted me to bail him out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 779

You deserved it 116

Today, I received an email saying, "Thinking of you and hoping you are taking care." It was from the love of my life. We broke up 20 years ago. Previously, we had contact every 5+ years. It's just too late. FML

I agree, your life sucks 673

You deserved it 123