Today, I went to a movie and a dinner with a girl. During dinner, she excused herself to go to the bathroom, so I checked my social media feeds while waiting for her to return. She'd posted on her Twitter "Worst. Ever." I thought it was going well. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went to the movies with a girl I like, then we went to grab a bite afterwards. She spent most of the time telling me how much she dislikes my best friend because he hooked up with a new girl. I then found out the two had been "talking" for a while. FML
Today, I went to see a movie with the girl I've liked for months. After the commercials, she told me she had to go to the ladies room. She never came back. FML
Today, I went on a Tinder date that was going surprisingly well. After dinner, she excused herself to the restroom… and never came back. I sat there for 25 minutes before realizing she had texted me: “Sorry, I saw my ex here and panicked. Hope you enjoy the fries.” I did not. FML
Today, after I invited my friend to a movie and she cancelled on me because she had to study, I obviously agreed and cancelled our tickets, I was scrolling through Instagram stories and came across hers, and saw she was with one of her friends in that same movie theater. FML
Today, I took a girl out to dinner. Halfway through, she sighed and asked if it was all an episode of Disaster Date. FML
Today, my girlfriend chose the most expensive restaurant in town, then spent the entire time facebooking, texting, and playing games on her phone while I dined in silence. This is the second time we've been out this week. She didn't even eat her food. I didn't even get a thank you. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were out to dinner. She had to use the bathroom, so she went, but the food came while she was in there. She came out, yelling at me for ordering the food to come that exact time, then she broke up with me. FML
Today, I went on a date. After we finished our meal, I had to use the bathroom really bad. When I said so, my date totally lost it and accused me of planning on climbing out a window and ditching her. "Fuck that and fuck you!" she said, then stormed out, leaving me with the bill. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I went on a date. I went to the bathroom. When I came back, she was sitting at a different table flirting with a guy that looked twice as old as her. FML
Today, I saw my girlfriend's mother tagged at a restaurant, the same one I had suggested we try earlier in the week. At the time, she quickly shut me down because "that place sounds terrible". I guess she forgot that she finally added me on Facebook. FML
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Top comments
deviable 9
Maybe it was the worst shit ever?
Mirorbo 27
Either young ladies' standards are getting too high, or they themselves are becoming too shallow.
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Comments (122)
cassi135t 1
Awe, ouch. Some people are jerks, they don't care about other peoples feelings.
Zaffro 8
This is to say that the guy isn't as boring as watching paint dry... And who takes a girl to a movie for one of the first few dates?!? You sit there in silence yes what a awesome way to get to know each other!!
mdizzl 6
maybe she meant the food? or the restaurant? or the movie? let's keep our fingers crossed for one of those
Mokiikom_fml 8
That's your cue to ditch the bitch right there, possibly with a nasty little note. Let's see who got pwned by social media then...
sxe_beast 11
But what if she was talking about the food or the movie? I And maybe she didn't know that he was e-stalking her so she was venting via the interwebs? Maybe she didn't want to be rude to him by telling him his choice of restaurant / movie completely sucked. She could totally like him, just not what they're doing? IDK.
sxe_beast 11
I would recommend bringing it up and try to be honest. Lashing out and not thinking everything through is not the best option. But its probably over and done with already...
leadsails320 0
Looks like you're not getting any tonight.
crushedone 7
That's when you post "What a bitch" or "My date smells like a putrid French prostitute's hairy armpit. #getmeoutofhere".
beebeeL 1
lollll
Mysanitywins 10
This isn't Twitter...
CruelGirl07 5
But what the OP was talking about was posted on twitter.
lerouxmaster 7
I request a moderator's help here...
buttercupp2137 0
awee); tough luck, you can't win them all.
lemothelemon 14
poor guy :( i hope you left her with the check!
roobin302 0
sounds like a girl i took out .. she was a bitch too .
sxe_beast 11
mc
captainfalcon7 0
post on you're Twitter "I wanna go home"
DrIDGAF 7
Thumb me down but it's YOUR! NOT YOU ARE
meeemo_ 0
Leave without paying the tab while she's in the restroom.