Today, I flew home early from a two-month trip to Europe to surprise my boyfriend on his birthday. When I got to his house with a home baked cake from scratch and a quilt with silk-screened pictures from my trip, his roommate answered the door and said, "Oh sorry, he's out with his girlfriend." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, it was my girlfriend's birthday. To surprise her, I told her that I was going away on business, and could not be there on her birthday. When I show up at her house to surprise her with a present and cake, she opens the door in her underwear, beside a man in his boxers. She was surprised. FML
Today, I was going to surprise my boyfriend at his family birthday celebration with a $2,000 trip he's always wanted, Ireland. Right before my gift, he had opened his mother's gift, an envelope containing a plane ticket. Guess where it was going? FML
Today, my boyfriend told me to stay home, because he wanted to come by to give me a birthday surprise. Later on, he came by, posted a note, rung the bell and left. The note was a break up note. FML
Today, I wanted to surprise my boyfriend by showing up at his place unannounced with some take-out food. I got there just in time to see him leave his block of flats with another girl. FML
Today, I planned a surprise birthday party for my boyfriend. I invited all his friends and made all his favorite food. He was running very late, so I called to ask what was taking so long. His response? He said he was at his house, with the very friends I was standing next to. FML
Today, I snuck into my boyfriend's house at 9am to surprise him on our 1 year anniversary. In the process, I gatecrashed another celebration he was having with his second girlfriend. FML
Today, after patiently waiting to see my boyfriend for a month because he was overseas, I excitedly went to the airport to finally pick him up, only for him to walk straight past me to greet his friends. He didn't even bring back anything for me, but brought back a suitcase full of goodies for his friends. FML
Today, I went to my boyfriend's apartment to surprise him with breakfast only to find that his other girlfriend had beat me to it. FML
Today, I threw an elaborate surprise birthday party for my boyfriend of four years. He thought we were going to a quiet dinner but when we arrived, thirty of his friends jumped out and surprised him. Instead of kissing me to thank me, he broke up with me because of how easily I had lied to him. FML
Today, I decided to pay a suprise visit to my boyfriend's house. I let myself in, walked up to his bedroom and found him dancing around. In the dress I had left the other weekend. FML
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Top comments
Capybara 0
At least you can keep the quilt. Pretty cool memento. Make sure you think of a creative way to dump him!
RodneySteven 0
OUCH!!! Now THAT'S a real FML moment. Your boyfriend's a real d-bag.
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Comments (96)
YallNoobs 0
the cake is a lie!!!
kissmyass_fml 0
omg kill that bastard fast!
artanis_neravar 0
bake him a new cake, this time bake ipecac and laxatives into it, and when he ******** and puking his organs out, say "by the way, we're through" then take pictures post them online
Chura 0
i like #18's idea. haha. maybe mix it with #24's idea.. take pictures of you putting laxatives into the cake with a big grin and a thumb's up.. too.. add that to the quilt.
_fthisshit 0
Aw, it's okay, he's a bastard. Haha, I agree with #25. That's brilliant! Well, you could have expected it, just saying.
Im_On_A_Boat 0
OK SO, bake him another cake and leave it at his door, but under the cake leave a DVD of you blowing his friend, spitting his cum into the cake mix, and putting the cake in the oven muhahaha I am awesome at revenge :D
you7 0
why did you leave europe you idiot
alex_vik 1
I love how I'm the only one who thinks the boyfriend might have just used it as an excuse.
alexa_rose 0
uhh..have NOT ONE of you people ever been in a relationship before? or do you not understand how life, or guys work.. i highly doubt hes gonna care if you make out with his roommate or his brother when he has a chick on the side.. and as for the people who say make another cake and put laxatives in it..umm i HIIIGHLY DOUBT i would eat a cake from my ex who just found out i was cheating.. just saying. but really, what a dick this guy is..i would have said okay roommate, im just gonna wait in his room until he gets home..and i WOULD wait in his room, in his bed, naked, wearing nothing but cake icing and hope he walked in with his new broad.
magicmarkers 0
that ****** sucks