Snowflakes - FML

Snowflakes

By Anonymous - 13/12/2020 10:58 - United States

Today, I bumped my head on a tool box. When it happened, I yelled, "Fuck." I got fired from my job for cussing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 026

You deserved it 286

Fête Nationale: Fireworks and Faux Pas
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Same thing different taste

Accidents will happen

By Anonymous - 27/04/2009 05:58 - United States

Today, at work, I managed to hit myself in the face with a large sheet pan. The force made me back into a shelf, which knocked a box off the top, which hit me in the head and knocked me out-cold. I now have a fat lip, a sore head, and bruises all over from the fall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 023

You deserved it 9 313

By bbbbb - 14/10/2012 05:29 - United States - Woodbridge

Today, I slipped on a crayon a little girl threw on the floor, causing me to drop the tray of water I was carrying, making me spill it all over her. After getting cussed out by her mom, I was fired for making a customer unhappy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 311

You deserved it 1 896

Boozing on the job

By paulcorrea95 - 21/09/2019 06:07 - United States

Today, I was at work, cleaning up a construction site. I picked up a beer can and accidentally spilled some of it on me. My boss came in to check on me and thought I was drunk. Instead of getting a raise, I was fired. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 809

You deserved it 196

Customer relationships

By UnemployedGirl - 02/07/2021 19:59

Today, I assisted a customer at work. She was asking me all sorts of stupid questions and acting like an entitled, spoiled brat. When she left, since I had a mask on, I meant to mouth, "Stupid bitch" but I blurted it out loud. Everyone heard. I was fired. FML

I agree, your life sucks 323

You deserved it 1 615

By gt - 23/09/2010 00:52 - Canada

Today, my boss fired me because I corrected him after he misspoke during a meeting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 812

You deserved it 35 796

HOW CAN SHE SLAP?

By sistermonster - 26/02/2014 09:45 - France - Salon-de-provence

Today, my boss fired me. I still can't really explain where the slap I gave him for it came from, though. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 450

You deserved it 37 903

By spreadburger - 21/11/2014 00:29 - United States - Tampa

Today, my co-worker threw a rubber mallet at my face, and I broke my finger in the process of saving my face. She then told me to "take it up with HR, bitch". She's the HR manager. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 966

You deserved it 2 847

By Ex-Employee - 31/07/2016 02:14 - United States

Today, my boss fired me for causing a "commotion" at work while running the vacuum. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 149

You deserved it 1 019

By BloodyHands - 17/12/2017 15:00

Today, my coworker and I were written up after we dropped a glass table, which shattered and left us with big cuts on our hands and arms. We weren’t written up for breaking the piece, but because a nearby customer heard us both swear in pain and reported us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 461

You deserved it 331

You're grounded!

By Break A Leg - 08/08/2022 14:00

Today, I accidentally slammed my leg against the coffee table. It was only after I went to the bathroom a few minutes later that I realized there's now a massive gash on my upper leg. I also got in trouble for yelling, "SON OF A BITCH!" as soon as the impact occurred. FML

I agree, your life sucks 779

You deserved it 140

Next

Top comments

RichardPencil 30

Sunday 13 December 2020 19:12

Well, you came to the right ******* website. **** is our first name!

Marcella1016 31

Sunday 13 December 2020 19:17

Come on down and make yourself at home here, where ****’s in the name and life is the game!

Comments

RichardPencil 30

Sunday 13 December 2020 19:12

Well, you came to the right ******* website. **** is our first name!

Marcella1016 31

Sunday 13 December 2020 19:17

Come on down and make yourself at home here, where ****’s in the name and life is the game!

Charlie Given 26

Monday 14 December 2020 5:40

well depending where you live that would be considered a wrongful dismissal time to talk to his boss or HR

lev 11

Monday 14 December 2020 8:29

depending on the job it could be justified. maybe it was a kindergarten?

BurnInDemonFire 35

Monday 14 December 2020 6:09

****!

phybreawptic 13

Tuesday 15 December 2020 12:13

I feel like there is way more to this.

phybreawptic 13

Tuesday 15 December 2020 12:14

I feel like there is way more to this.

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The Top

Today, I felt a horrible pain while having sex with my wife, and I had to stop. I thought it was a hernia or something, but she called me a liar and accused me of everything from not finding her attractive, to me cheating on her. It turned out I had appendicitis. She still won't apologize. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 596

You deserved it 3 056

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 794

You deserved it 1 901

The Top

Today, after I used to look down on my brother for being a nerd, he now creates computer software for a living making megabucks. Meanwhile, I deliver lorry loads of gravel and cement to building sites for minimum wage, one step above breaking rocks for a living. FML

I agree, your life sucks 220

You deserved it 1 860

Today, I spent all day watching sad cat adoption/rescue videos on Instagram and now I'm bummed out thinking about how mine are going to die within my lifetime. FML

I agree, your life sucks 579

You deserved it 577

Today, it's my birthday. I called my mom to thank her for the gift she'd sent. She was surprised and said, "Oh I thought you were waiting to open it." She ended the conversation with, "OK, I'll call you on your birthday." FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 175

You deserved it 1 372

Today, I sent my boyfriend a naughty pic. I then asked him if there was anything else he wanted before I got dressed. His reply? "No it's fine." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 029

You deserved it 15 652

Today, I actually googled whether masturbation could induce weight loss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 165

You deserved it 346

Today, I invited my deadbeat dad over for dinner, hoping we could resolve our issues and build a proper relationship. Just minutes after he arrived, I caught him stealing money from my purse. He actually said I owe him for raising me. He ditched my mom and me when I was 5. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 967

You deserved it 4 207