Today, I had to eat my breakfast in terrified silence, as my hungover mother staggered into the room, shouted at the kettle for not boiling fast enough, and after a few seconds, screamed that I'd sabotaged it. I'm now grounded for supposedly trying to fuck with her head. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mom tried to ground me. In the apartment that I own. Because I didn't eat enough of the dinner that I'd made. FML
Today, I was so hungover, I started yelling at inanimate objects. My mom walked in on me calling my cereal a "worthless piece of shit sent from the bowels of Hell." FML
Today, I was woken up to my mother screaming obscenities at me, all because I threw up last night after days of not feeling well, and the flushing of the toilet afterwards woke her up. FML
Today, I woke up early, went to the gym, then came home and showered. When I went into my room to change, my mom woke up and started pounding on my door, screaming about how lazy and useless I was for sleeping so late. When I tried to tell her otherwise, she grounded me for "talking back". FML
Today, my dad got so drunk that he had an intense argument with the microwave, resulting in him threatening to ground me after I tried to calm him down. FML
Today, my normally very modest and prissy mom came home, pissed off about something. I asked her what was wrong, but she wouldn't say, and snapped at me to "fuck off." She then grounded me for "making" her use that kind of "vile language." FML
Today, I woke up with a hangover from last night. Last night, I snuck out and went to a party at a club. To hide my hangover, I cleaned myself up and walked into the kitchen to get a drink. My mother looked at me and said, "What's that on your wrist?" I'd forgotten I'd left the wristband on from the club. I'm already grounded. FML
Today, I went to the kitchen to grab some cereal. I guess my mum didn't hear me, because as I entered, I heard her ranting to herself about her, "goddamn fucking Cheerios". I started to slowly back out, but I tripped over my own feet. She heard and yelled at me for "sneaking around". FML
Today, I briefly left my laptop while I went to use the toilet. When I came back, I found "I" had posted on Facebook, calling my mom a "stupid cunt who should just stay in the kitchen." The only other person home at the time was my grandpa. She didn't believe it, and permanently grounded me. FML
Today, I was waiting for the pan to heat up so I could make myself scrambled eggs. Just then, my mom runs up to me, cracks an egg open on my head, and runs away laughing. I only had one other egg. FML
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Top comments
Dblocker 18
Are you sure she was only hungover?
gracehi 33
Wait! You mean New Zealand has alcohol? And alcohol in New Zealand ***** you up like anywhere else? And it's just as addictive??? NO WAY!!!
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Comments (68)
InfiniIII 6
I think it's just PMS...
merrielp 13
Well, you might as well do something to deserve being grounded now...
Hellbound_Alleee 14
Don't enable her alcoholism by honoring her punishment.
moonbane 9
If its like that, or frequent at all, you should probably get AA for her :/
Bludmagnus 13
Obviously a "I am going on the rag, so I will drink some red wine tonight" hangover.
sorrowsangel89 1
I empathize with u...u need to get away. That kind of crazy only gets worse unchecked.
TcheQ 12
You have to talk very clearly and abruptly to people in this state. Tey can't argue against authority. Very obvious statements like "Don't get angry at me becuase you're still drunk" "Yes, of course, I sabotaged a kettle because I hate you and thought you wouldn't find out" That and, your mums a ****. Sorry you havea crappy homelife :(
B5B0N35 18
Awkward
worldclassrager 41
Well add a dash of salt it makes it boil faster still with that comment it doesn't surprise me