Today, a cop car was tailing me. I was scared, and trying to avoid any tickets, I drove straight through a huge pothole rather than swerving to avoid it. The cop pulled me over and insisted I was intoxicated, because, "anybody in their right mind would've dodged that pothole." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was driving home from work when I was pulled over by a cop. She asked why I was being pulled over and figuring she knew I said, "For swerving because of my alcohol problem." I had a broken tail light. FML
Today, I was driving home. I desperately needed the bathroom, so I was speeding a little bit. A cop pulled me over and gave me hell. He said he'd heard my story a hundred times and didn't believe me. I couldn't hold it and ended up marinating in my own piss while he ran my plates. FML
Today, I crashed into a pole on purpose as a cop pulled me over for speeding. I figured the officer would feel bad for me and that the cost of fixing my car would be less than a ticket. He gave me one anyway. FML
Today, I was driving on the freeway when I saw a car in front of me swerving across 3 lanes of traffic. Thinking he might be drunk, I dialed 911 on my phone, but I dropped it. I fished under my seat to get it, swerving, and got pulled over by highway patrol and given a field sobriety test. FML
Today, while I was driving, a police officer jumped out from the sidewalk and into my lane. I slammed on the brakes so I wouldn't hit him. He then gave me a ticket for "obstructing traffic." FML
Today, a policeman pulled me over and proceeded to flirt with me. After I had rejected him, he gave me a ticket for "not paying attention to the road". FML
Today, I was pulled over for a DWI. The police officer was drunk. FML
Today, while driving home I had to pee really bad, so I speeded up to get home quicker. I got pulled over for speeding and peed my pants. The cop, assuming I was drunk, made me take a sobriety test. I had to walk a straight line with piss all over my pants at 2:00 in the afternoon. FML
Today, I held my bag of burger and fries out the window while driving, to preserve that new car smell. Not only did I hit a pothole and lose my lunch, I got pulled over by a cop who suspected I was either littering or tossing drugs when I saw him. FML
Today, I was driving a little over the speed limit, when I saw a cop car waiting to join the road ahead of me. I quickly hit the brakes so they wouldn't have a payday with me. I hit the brakes too hard, lost control and almost ended up on someone's lawn. FML
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Top comments
MrConcise 35
Just act like a normal person when cops are tailing you, you'll look less suspicious. You think they don't know you're going five miles under the speed limit because they're behind you?
devildog562 33
Pot hole troll at your service .
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Comments (61)
caitlin547 13
If OP doesn't trust cops and one was following him, the pressure to act normal would be difficult
Thorzix 23
He's kind of right, you know. There's no reason you should get scared of having a cop follow you in the first place, just drive normally, do your stops and don't speed and nothing'll happen.
RayvenWhite 12
Lol sorry OP, that's just funny.
foxfur 25
I'm from Vermont XD We have the same thing here, birthing the joke "can't tell if its a drunk driver or dodging potholes." you know they are drunk if they hit them all.
ninjakreborn 1
What I normally do if a cop is following me is simple. If I'm not doing anything wrong or don't have anything in the car that's illegal then it doesn't matter and I don't worry about it. If I am carrying something I can't get caught with, or don't have insurance then I typically use the same tactic every time. If I get a cop behind me then I'll pull in somewhere. Race Trac to act like I'm going in or getting gas. Walmart, a store, whatever. I pick a random place, pull in and walk in. Very rarely will a cop follow you in. Normally if they do they won't bother giving you a ticket anyone once your parked. One time a friend of mine was with me and we had weed on us. We got a cop behind us and it was a strong smell. I didn't have car insurance either. I pulled into Racetrac and decided to get gas because he was behind us. He simply pulled up and told me to replace the broken tail light and drove off. Nothing else.