Today, after coming home from surgery, I discovered that the heating in my entire building had failed. I called my mom asking if I could come and stay with her for a few days. She told me to "think warm thoughts." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, anticipating another stressful day of work, I left my house with a cluster of thoughts in my mind. It was only when I heard my front door lock behind me, my hand still resting on the handle, that I realised I had forgotten my house keys. FML
Today, my family went on vacation. I had to stay home to take care of everyone's animals. I called my mom, who said she was too busy to talk to me. When my sister asked her who was on the phone, she replied, "The dog sitter." FML
Today, I wanted to spend the day cleaning my room. My mom thinks that I was lying just to stay home, so she yelled at me to go to her shop. At the shop, she yelled at me for not being any help. When we got home she yelled at me for having a messy room. FML
Today, I wasn't allowed to work from home, despite being ill enough to just take the day off anyway, all so there could be "someone to answer the phone." The phone didn't ring once all day. FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house waiting to surprise him when he got home from work. I was laying in his bed when he called to tell me we were over. I couldn't leave before he got home. FML
Today, I returned to my apartment to find everything reduced to ashes, hidden in black clouds of smoke. Turns out there was a blackout, and my fiancé lit a candle on top of a stack of all our wedding papers. When he smelled the smoke, he got hungry for a taco and left instead of calling 911. FML
Today, I was walking out of my front door in the town where I intern. I live alone and know no one. As I'm locking the door, I see a golf ball wedged between my mat and step. I notice that there's writing on it so I pick it up to read, "You look hot when you sleep." FML
Today, I found myself sneaking into my apartment to avoid the old lady who lives next to me. Funnily enough, I moved into my own apartment because I was tired of sneaking into it to avoid my mom, who lived with me. FML
Today, I woke up to my apartment filled with smoke, fire alarms blaring. My roommate set my kitchen on fire while making hot dogs. This is the fourth time this has happened. FML
Today, my mom had an appointment with my teacher after class. She never showed. My teacher ended up driving me home. FML
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Top comments
Pleonasm 36
It really brings my blood to a boil when parents don't give the slightest regards to their children. OP I hope you warm to the idea of disowning such a careless ice-queen.
badbadkitty 5
Wow. Sounds like your mother really cares about your well being! I'm so sorry OP! I'm sure you have friends who care more than your mother!
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Comments (44)
RZB 11
I have to warm you. Thinks like this chill me to the bone. Ice see why your life sucks.
morrissey41 7
That's why you should get a girlfriend so when a situation like this happens you have an excuse to share each others body heat :)
winkydog4056 16
As someone who's had 14 orthopedic surgeries, I feel your pain. It was only the last one did I have someone to care about me. Hang in there!
oxygenius 14
Reference from The Secret?
mario2012 18
Your mom is a bitch.
Shadow_Phantom 26
Eh... at least it's not 105'F (40.5'C) outside, with the air conditioning being broke. Hopefully you can get a few blankets to keep warm, and FYL for having a jerkface of a mother.
CallmeRyuzaki 0
Better hot than cold I say.
A7XCamaro 19
I always say better cold than hot, it is much easier to get warm than it is to cool off.
Enslaved 38
Cold showers, swimming in the lake, ice cold drinks etc... I'd think it would be easier to cool off. ***But I would rather freeze to death than burn. :P
starcrossddream 14
I agree, better hot than cold. Cold actually hurts. Heat will eventually dehydrate you or give you a heatstroke, but at least it isn't a painful, achy process.
sugarshane007 20
She's as cold as ice! She's willing to sacrifice! Your looove.
Enslaved 38
I thumbed you up! I love reading song references. (:
hama806 19
She sounds cold hearted to me so you wouldn't have gotten warm there anyway.
Enslaved 38
Your mom sounds colder than your building. ):
Kukironosuke 16
are you the "get ******" girl's brother?