I hate myself

By trixanne - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - Australia - Sydney

Today, anticipating another stressful day of work, I left my house with a cluster of thoughts in my mind. It was only when I heard my front door lock behind me, my hand still resting on the handle, that I realised I had forgotten my house keys. FML
I agree, your life sucks 28 716
You deserved it 3 947

Same thing different taste

Not a morning person at the best of times

By shouldhavestayedinbed - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, my doorbell rang while I was still in bed. I leapt out and immediately got a severe cramp in one leg, then, staggering around trying to throw some clothes on, I scraped the other leg badly enough to draw blood. When I got to the door there was nobody there, just a parcel on the doorstep. FML
I agree, your life sucks 13 697
You deserved it 2 180

Top comments

The worst! I've done that and had to unscrew a window and climb through. Fortunately I live in the middle of nowhere so no one saw.

you turn the lock and pull the door behind you..

Comments

Good Ol stress. Makes a bad day worse.

If you don't live by yourself, I really don't think it's a problem

Have you been locked out of your house before?

I think what #3 meant was that another member of the household would most likely have a key and it wouldn't be a problem getting back in :)

And why would OP post this if it wasn't a problem? Think people, think.

Call in sick. Don't even bother going to work.

kirbs19 37

DANG NABIT! I've done that before

The worst! I've done that and had to unscrew a window and climb through. Fortunately I live in the middle of nowhere so no one saw.

I'd be afraid to live in the middle of nowhere. What if someone else broke into your house and no one saw to report it? :O

Thing about the middle of nowhere is, there's not really anyone around to break into your house. Can't imagine a robber would be like, "Let's turn down this dirt road next to a cornfield and check out the prospects."

Yeah, but if horror movies have taught me anything, the middle of no where is home to backwoods, chainsaw-wielding serial killers. :o

How do you lock the door from the outside with no keys?

you turn the lock and pull the door behind you..

They never said they locked it from the outside.

My door doesn't have a handle, it has two locks and the top lock acts as a handle from the inside. Once you close the door, you need to use the top lock to open it. Basically put the key in, turn it and push the door.

Is it illegal to break into your own house?

xninix_fml 36

what? if its your house you're not "breaking in". here, how about you do it and call the police and explain how you broke into your own house. id love to hear what their reaction would be

#23 why are all your comments so damn condescending? Every time you post something it's either a rude reply to a joke, or a ******* paragraph telling somebody off because they made a joke. What happened to FML? This is supposed to be about making light of a situation with lame puns and witty joking. Stop being so serious!!

Not even sure why you'd break into your own house and then call the police unless you were in danger, such as someone locking you out of the house that shouldn't even be in your house.