Today, I witnessed a large woman pee on a pregnancy test in the middle of a Walmart parking lot, clean herself off, then wander around with the test hanging out of her mouth, waiting for her result. Where in the name of Christ do these people come from? FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I was at the mall with my young daughter. I hate pooping in public but I really had to go so I brought her in with me. Thinking we were alone, I started to go and my daughter yelled, "Good job Mommy, you're using the potty like a big girl!" I then heard laughing. FML
Today, I saw a woman breastfeeding her child at the local park. That would have been just fine if the child wasn't at least 8 years-old. FML
Today, I was driving when I saw someone pulled over on the side of the road. Wanting to help, I pulled over. In so doing, I ran over something that popped my tire. The guy had just pulled over to pee. FML
Today, I was in the toilet. Some idiots thought it was funny to throw a water balloon into the cubicle. The balloon didn't pop, but fell in the toilet, sending my own urine onto my shorts. I had 4 hours left of school. FML
Today, my wife, who has a drinking problem, looked me straight in the eye as she poured herself a "water" bottle to enjoy while at work. FML
Today, I got a new babysitting job. Every time the little girl goes to the bathroom, she screams and cries until I wipe her. She's 7 years old. FML
Today, my mother told my boyfriend a cute story about me when I was little. The one where my cousin and I were caught pooping in a urinal in the church basement. FML
Today, I was sitting on the toilet, pregnant as ever, and really sick. I asked my fiancé to bring me a pair of clean underwear. He did so and brought me some lacy underwear. They weren't mine. FML
Today, I got on the bus to go to work. I managed to get a seat, but an old lady who looked tired had to stand. I offered her my seat, but she glared at me, frowned and said, "Go fuck yourself." Everyone laughed as I sat there in dismay. FML
Today, I was in a public restroom taking a dump. It's difficult for me to do it in public, so to make it easier I kept telling myself, "Nobody's here, you're all alone." I then heard, "No, you're not." I didn't realize I was saying it out loud, or that I wasn't alone. FML
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Top comments
Blue_Black_fml 21
Dear God! I just hope that the test result is negative..
grahmagog 14
Im never suprised by walmart customers any more
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Comments (160)
SirMichael 13
They come from trailer parks.
csi_fml 19
Only at Walmart
Enslaved 36
Hey! I shop at Walmart and I'm not crazy. :P I just go for the cheap discounts and people watching. I like to play the game-- count the ones shopping in their PJs. Fun, fun!
booboohoney 12
#41 what's the point in changing out of pjs just to run to Walmart?! (asks the girl w the honey booboo inspired name)
perdix 29
#41, my favorite Walmart game is Name the Disability of the people using the electric scooters. I ring a bell when the answer is not sheer laziness and/or obesity. I rarely get to ring the bell.
andrekrivo 20
'murica
Tristyxxx 24
I hope it was negative :/
Jharrist89 12
Haha! Should have taken a picture and submitted it to "People of Walmart" on Facebook!!
heyhihello95 12
Kill it with fire!!
amifaiyaz 12
You tend to meet the most colorful people in Walmart.
Schiffy 18
They probably come from Walmart.
acrouch 9
I call them Wal-Marshions ...