Today, at the swimming pool, I thought it'd be funny to sneak up on my 5-year-old daughter underwater and surprise her. I grabbed her by the sides, and she shrieked. A moment later, a brown cloud erupted from her swimsuit. Cue screaming and a mass panic from the other kids. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I took my 4-year-old daughter to the local pool for swim lessons. As we walked onto the deck she turned to me and said "Mom, that lady has really big boobs!" The whole pool heard, even the man my daughter was referring to. FML
Today, I took my two-year-old daughter swimming. While sitting in the hot tub, my daughter pointed to the elderly man sitting across from us and mumbled something. I couldn't understand her, so I asked her to repeat it. After two more attempts, she shouted, "MOM! He has big boobs!" FML
Today, I was at a pool party. My friend's little sister pushed me in the pool, so when I got out, I pushed her in. She started screaming, and I started laughing because I thought she was pissed that I'd pushed her in. That wasn't why she was screaming. She can't swim. Her whole family witnessed it. FML
Today, my friend and I decided to go skinny-dipping in her pool just after we'd finished watching a scary movie. While we were in the pool, I heard something move in the bushes so I freaked out and ran onto the deck, slipping and falling flat on my back. Her dad saw the whole thing. FML
Today, I went to the pool. When I hit the water the top of my swimsuit came off so I tried to put it on underwater. The lifeguard thought I was drowning and pulled me out in front of everyone. Topless. FML
Today, I was swimming at the water park, when out of nowhere a lifeguard bombed into the pool, grabbed me, and hauled me to the surface, running his hands over my chest in the process. Apparently, the way I swim makes it look like I'm in my drowning death throes. FML
Today, I was stretching on the balcony, when I heard my neighbor's daughter scream. She was playing in their kiddie pool and thought I was peeping on her. And now her parents think so too. FML
Today, while at the public swimming pool, I gave my 2-year-old daughter a piggy back ride in the pool. We were having fun until I realized she had untied my swim top. FML
Today, I went swimming at a public pool. When I dove in, my speedos decided they’d had enough of me and slipped right off. I spent a minute underwater debating my life choices before realizing they’d floated to the shallow end, right next to a group of giggling kids. FML
Today, I went to the pool with my son. One moment I'm sitting down, applying sunscreen to my legs, and the next I look up to see him squatting on the diving board, seconds before dropping a deuce into the pool. As we got kicked out, he screamed that it was my fault. FML
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Top comments
nodeathtoall 19
You literally scared the shit out of her Bravo
MassiDelta 28
I will not make a horrible pun this time
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Comments (85)
wickedhyype 17
Scared shitless
Jnastayy 13
Well shit
Catvillanueva 9
ewww haha
nominaski 25
. . .
ohSNAPyall 27
KILLER SHART!
jadeleepenguin 29
I was waiting for "it wasn't my daughter"
XLTDX 0
OMG I totally thought the same thing! ?
alexanderavatar 24
you were right that is funny
IvyRizzzzoli 25
I feel for the kid though she was probably mortified
SS 31
Would've loved to see this on video!
zyero 9
And you just scarred your kid for life, congrats YDI
intertk555 11
Sneak Attack lol
darthhera 11
Reason #42 that condoms and birth control pills were invented.
Ichiya 29
No one has ever gotten pregnant from shit floating in the pool.
darthhera 11
If you had any modicum of intelligence, you would know I meant the OP should have never been a parent if this is how they treat their child.
chriss2015 13
Grow up, seriously? Did you not catch the sarcasm there? If u had any intelligence obviously you would know this was a silly practical joke gone wrong and it's in no way a reflection of said parents abilities to provide for their child. The person who responded to you was making light of the fact that youre an idiot.