Night terrors

By scared shitless - 24/06/2020 08:02

Today, I learned the hard way that my girlfriend’s young daughter sleepwalks. I got up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water, only to be greeted in the dimly lit hallway by her creepy silhouette. I yelped like a bitch and dropped the glass on my foot, breaking two toes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 753

You deserved it 359

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Same thing different taste

By RightInTheFace - 12/09/2015 16:16 - United Kingdom - Cardiff

Today, I found out that my girlfriend sleepwalks. Well, I say sleepwalks, more like sleep punches. Very, very hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 580

You deserved it 1 904

By Anonymous - 22/01/2014 00:55 - United Kingdom - Glasgow

Today, I learned that my girlfriend can sleepwalk. She got up, came into the living room where I was laying back against the sofa playing video games. I wasn't really paying much attention, until she stepped on my crotch, after which she left. She doesn't remember a thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 371

You deserved it 6 205

Too much

By Lost Reggie - 05/07/2024 05:00 - United States - Tulsa

Today, my daughter had her gall bladder removed after just having liver surgery, my girlfriend tripped and fell, breaking several toes and possibly her ankle, and I got almost no sleep between my night shifts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 415

You deserved it 94

By Anya - 17/12/2016 16:09 - Japan - Fukuoka

Today, after being fed up with my sarcastic, mouthy daughter, I decided to remove her TV from her room. I dropped it on my foot and broke two toes. She promptly said, "That's what you get." FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 690

You deserved it 1 828

Ouch

By Anonymous - 13/01/2013 12:41 - United States

Today, while trying to quietly sneak a midnight snack with my girlfriend, I was slowly opening the pantry door so I wouldn't wake my mother. My girlfriend came and swung open the door onto my foot, taking the top layer of skin with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 425

You deserved it 5 199

Freaky

By Anonymous - 28/01/2016 20:24 - United States - Honolulu

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom. I was there with the lights out when something ran across my foot. I freaked out, tried to kick it off, and ended up smashing my foot into the side of the tub. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 405

You deserved it 3 188

By Anonymous - 21/10/2014 15:49 - United States - Bedford

Today, I was woken up by my dog touching my foot, so I tried to push it away. Then I realized that I'd kicked my girlfriend in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 822

You deserved it 7 808

By ohdang - 12/08/2009 06:20 - United States

Today, whilst babysitting, I broke a glass. I explained to the kid that it was very important not to walk barefoot around where it had happened, because of the tiny bits of glass. He jumped back, scared, and while doing so tripped. I rushed to help him and ran through the broken glass. Barefoot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 365

You deserved it 12 877

By Kaz - 07/05/2011 06:40 - United States

Today, I snuck out to see my girlfriend in the middle of the night. When I got to her house, I decided to throw a rock at her window to wake her up. It broke a hole in the window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 586

You deserved it 50 276

By badmom101 - 16/05/2009 11:26 - Canada

Today, my 5 year old daughter thought it would be funny to wake me up by tickling my toes. I guess one of my reflexes acted out because I kicked her right in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 691

You deserved it 6 400

icalledhisname 12

Wednesday 24 June 2020 13:52

No joke, there is nothing scarier in this world than a little girl at night. My young daughter has scared the crap out of me so many times! When you aren’t expecting them to be there, it’s terrifying

Amy78_fml 11

Wednesday 24 June 2020 13:57

That is something to be told up front. My husband sleep walks to the "bathroom." Sometimes he actually gets to the toilet. He has opened closet doors then peed in the floor. I frequently have to rescue him because he is repeatedly walking into a wall like there is suppose to be an opening. I've threatened to cut off his liquids after 8.

Comments

icalledhisname 12

Wednesday 24 June 2020 13:52

Amy78_fml 11

Wednesday 24 June 2020 13:57

Bamisoep 9

Wednesday 24 June 2020 15:49

It does scare the shit out of you. My daughter did the same when she was like 7 or 8. Also sometimes when she had a nightmare she would get out hers and stand next to our bed, just waiting for that something-is-wrong father-feeling kicks in and I open my eyes and seeing a figure in the dark.