Intimacy: Misleading

Misleading

By KL. - 05/06/2009 19:46 - Canada

Today, I was at a club with a friend. A cute guy kept smiling and looking over at me. He left his seat and went to the bar and brought back two drinks. He waved me over and then said, "Can you tell your hot friend that I bought her a drink?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 494

You deserved it 5 013

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 23/11/2014 01:33 - United States - Chicago

Today, I was at a club and caught a cute guy's eye from across the bar. He smiled at me, got up and came over, then said "Oh shit! You looked way hotter from back there. Damn!" and walked away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 026

You deserved it 3 581

By darn it. - 20/02/2009 16:16 - United States

Today, I was at a bar with a friend. A guy came up to me, took my drink and drank it. I laughed and jokingly said "now, you have to buy me a drink." He said "I would rather buy your friend a drink." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 042

You deserved it 4 156

Reality check

By DerrickUhl - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - Napa

Today, I finally turned 21, so my friends and I decided to go to a club. There, I met this hot waitress and we were really hitting it off. I ordered a drink. She replied, "No problem, kiddo." FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 118

You deserved it 7 171

By 0ptimu5 - 11/09/2009 04:39 - Australia

Today, I saw a cute girl at a night club. When I approached her and introduced myself, she said "Don't you remember me? We danced here last weekend... but you were smashed that night". I cheekily replied "Oh really? That's hot, what happened next?" She said "You were hitting on me. So, I left." FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 692

You deserved it 43 452

Fishing

By notgoth - 27/07/2014 22:17 - Netherlands - Rijen

Today, I went to a bar with my best friend, and some guys came up to us and started flirting with her and offering her a drink. I felt a bit left out and started joking that "I'm thirsty too". One guy looked at me, cringed and said, "No, I don't buy drinks for weird girls." FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 643

You deserved it 8 419

Nice, thanks

By rmonk - 06/07/2016 12:17 - United States - Carpentersville

Today, I was hanging out with a friend at an ice cream place, and a guy started chatting with us. As he eventually went to leave, he told me, "That's a nice looking date you got there." Then he turned to my friend. "Wish I could say the same to you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 556

You deserved it 1 005

By hihipanda - 30/08/2009 12:58 - Singapore

Today, my friend and I went to a bar for drinks. I noticed this cute girl and went over to say "Hi." I had a great conversation with her and I asked for her number before she left. She passed it to me on a piece of paper with instructions specifying for my friend to call her and not me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 515

You deserved it 3 329

Pleased to meet you

By footinmouth - 13/09/2009 05:14 - United States

Today, I went to a restaurant with some friends. I noticed a very cute waitress about my age, so I walked over to her and asked if she had a boyfriend. The extremely fit, attractive waiter standing next to her immediately turned, held out his hand and goes, "Yeah. Meet me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 991

You deserved it 14 065

By ZAS - 22/08/2012 16:57 - Canada - Toronto

Today, while I was shopping at a store with my friend, I noticed a cute girl smiling at us. My friend said, "She's all yours," and walked away. When I approached her, she asked me if my friend was single. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 276

You deserved it 2 063

By grenade - 17/07/2011 06:24 - United States

Today, I was at a club with my friends, when a group of guys approached us. It got quiet for a second, and I heard one of them say, "It's okay, I've got the fat one this time," then walk over and start talking to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 012

You deserved it 7 901

seruulian 0

Friday 5 June 2009 23:06

geez! that's rude. he should have gone to your friend directly ... what a coward

AngelRaven89 0

Friday 5 June 2009 23:02

Aww, Im sure you are sexy too =)

Comments

fantasyworld 37

Friday 4 July 2014 3:03

He's a douche, couldn't even do it himself.

danny_doom27 6

Saturday 20 June 2015 20:44

well clearly you are FUGLY as shit so just be grateful he even acknowledged your existence and that you can help people get laid

Keywords

Weird Miscellaneous Awkward Shopping My ex Racism Family Relatable Kids AITA Love Cheating Work Break-ups Animals Cats Cute Sex Intimacy Relationship advice Alcohol Coworkers Mental health Health Psychology Cops Neighbours Stressed out Scary Parents

The Top

Today, my grandpa forgot that my aunt set up a baby monitor in his bedroom in case of a fall. I’m sitting in the living room with his wife - who is deaf - and I hear him moaning over the baby monitor. My grandfather was jerking off and forgot that someone could hear him. I wish I could forget too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 658

You deserved it 130

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting it on. At one point, he started to kiss my ear. Then, he stopped, went into the bathroom, and came out with about four Q-tips. He then said to me, "Just take care of your ears, then I'll continue." FML

I agree, your life sucks 860

You deserved it 2 006

The Top

Today, the guy who confessed his love for me also confessed that in his rage, he almost shot the last girl who broke his heart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 957

You deserved it 2 919

Today, I brought my dog to the vet for a routine surgery. The vets assured me that no dog had ever died during this procedure. Apparently my dog was the first. FML

I agree, your life sucks 129 721

You deserved it 5 344

Today, as I was sitting on my terrace, I was wearing neither bright colors, nor any perfume, yet two bees seemed convinced that I must've been some type of flower and persistently tried to figure out where I was hiding my nectar. FML

I agree, your life sucks 565

You deserved it 92

Today, my wife, a married mum of three boys, with a full time job, and a mortgage, burst into tears because, “Five minutes ago I was 20 years-old, getting high and drunk, with oodles of money” and, “What the hell happened to my life?” Gee, I never knew I ruined her life so much. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 274

You deserved it 348

Today, I was making out with this guy I had been seeing, and things start to get pretty steamy. As he paused for a second, I thought he was going to get up and find a condom, but instead he turns to me and says, "I think I'm going to go to the library." I wasn't invited. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 268

You deserved it 3 544

Today, a guy I genuinely hate more than anyone else in my life complimented my new haircut. I had to thank him or I'd be yelled at by my boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 393

You deserved it 209