Lonely, so lonely…
Today, my loneliness reached a new level when I befriended the fly in my apartment, Mr. Stickyfoot. FML
Today, my loneliness reached a new level when I befriended the fly in my apartment, Mr. Stickyfoot. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I was so lonely that I had a 3 hour conversation with a one-legged cricket I found in my room. I'm keeping him. He has a name. FML
Today, I put up one of those hanging fly catchers in my room due to the unsettling amount of flies in the house. I remarked how stupid flies were to land on them. Within an hour, I got up and walked straight into it. FML
Today, I walked past my fly strip while a fly who had been caught, but hadn't yet died, was on it. While I was there, I could hear his frantic buzzing and see his little arms flailing like mad as he tried in vain to escape. Great. Now I feel like shit for putting these things up. What kind of a monster am I? FML
Today, a small fly was harassing my face, then it landed on a book next to me. I waved at it to make it leave, but it didn't. I got my fingers closer to it, to scare it off. Instead, it jumped on my finger as a playful parrot pet, spent a moment there, and flew off. I cannot even intimidate a fly. FML
Today, I was stuck in a room with a man who was catching flies. That I could cope with, until he insisted on turning the lights out because it was 'stressing out' his flies. FML
Today, my friend bet everyone at my lunch table that no one could catch the fly that was flying around our table. I reached up and caught it. It was a wasp, and it stung me. FML
Today, my friends had ditched me for a party I hadn't been invited to so I was sitting home alone. The only other thing in my house was the mosquito I nicknamed Fred. I liked to watch Fred fly around and try to suck my blood. Twenty minutes later, I found Fred's dead body. I was actually sad. FML
Today, while I was eating, a fly kept pissing me off. After three minutes of it buzzing around, I caught it and killed it. Then, without realizing it, I smeared its guts all over the front of my shirt. FML
Today, I realized how bored I am with life in general, as well as how bad my ADHD has gotten, when I saw a fly eating a crumb I dropped on the floor and watched it for two minutes straight. FML
Today, I was drinking coffee at work, while being surrounded by a lot of flies in the area I was working. Later, in the evening, I found a fly under my bottom denture plate. It'd been there for about 12 hours. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
mothertruck 6
You are a friend to me too, JustAnotherFML23 - Mr. Stickyfoot
wowlolreally 12
Flies need love too
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (55)
bosox29 14
Ah yes Mr. Stickyfoot!! Thank you for letting this one be published! Made my day.
notsofriendly 17
This is kind of cute and really sad at the same time.
LegolasPrincess 10
This is really terrible, maybe a dog or a cat next time OP?
beanthemouse 13
This reminds me of when I was in grade 7. I had no friends and always sat alone in class. I was happy when a fly landed on me. Anyways, one day the fly was on the desk and some scumbag boy wacked it (and hit it would you believe?) and stuck the half dead body in MY electric pencil sharpener, and using MY pencil, stuck it in and grinded the poor fly up. Gosh I hated grade 7 :(
martin8337 35
All of my flies are named Marty.
Hazelino 25
I befriended a pigeon, I named her Louise..
ulissey_fml 22
You've no idea. Mine is a **** roach that slowly crosses the living room at about 3am every night. It's gotten used to me.
JoseIsAdork 31
awww , at least the fly has a cute name. I used to have a spider who would just kick back and hang with me while I was on the computer, he just relaxed in the corner, his name was Ernesto, one day he just disappeared though :/ I'll never know where he went to
Infinity1337 11
*you've got a friend in me* sings toy story tune
sirjuice35 11
this is so sad...