Health, Accident and Painful: Kitchen nightmare - FML

Kitchen nightmare

By Defeated by cups - 21/11/2023 09:00 - United States

Today, I tried to get a cup from the designated cabinet. As soon as I opened it, a glass cup fell down, which I narrowly saved from breaking by having it bounce off my foot. Obviously, that didn't feel good. But you know what also didn't feel good? The travel mug falling on my head immediately afterward. FML

I agree, your life sucks 421

You deserved it 121

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 11/11/2010 17:46 - United States

Today, I was drinking coffee out of my favorite mug, when it slipped out of my hand. I caught it, but not before most of the hot coffee spilled all over my lap. In reaction, I dropped the mug again, shattering it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 246

You deserved it 4 260

Cool moves

By UUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGHHHH - 09/11/2022 22:00

Today, I tried to open my water bottle, which is like trying to open a pickle jar, and after several seconds, it exploded all over my desk and clothes. Then, when I was going to get paper towels and a change of clothes, I slipped on the puddle and hit my head on my desk as I came crashing down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 771

You deserved it 188

Walnut head

By Anonymous - 16/03/2017 02:00

Today, after sweeping up a spill, I managed to break the cupboard door. With my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 778

You deserved it 547

By Anonymous - 14/05/2019 06:00 - United States - Mansfield

Today, I fell down the stairs with a cup of coffee. It gave me burns on my arm and I sprained my wrist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 619

You deserved it 239

Coordination malfunction

By Anonymous - 25/05/2024 05:00 - United States

Today, I fell down the stairs while holding a cup of hot coffee. Now I have burns all over me and a twisted ankle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 409

You deserved it 101

By Anonymous - 17/05/2012 21:54 - United States - Spring

Today, after having a pretty rough day, I decided a nice, hot shower would be great. Ten minutes in, the shower head apparently couldn't take the water pressure anymore, and it flew off and hit me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 335

You deserved it 2 191

By disheshateme - 18/11/2009 07:03 - United States

Today, it was my turn to do the suite's dishes. I was in the process of drying my roommate's coffee mug when the handle suddenly snapped off and the sharp edge left on the mug scraped down my arm. I now have a 3-inch long gash in my arm. I was attacked by a cheap coffee mug. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 706

You deserved it 3 986

Time out

By Starfucks - 17/12/2015 02:55 - United States - Bensalem

Today, I was in Starbucks with my daughter when she noticed a travel cup she liked. She picked one up and asked for it, but I said no because it was expensive. She angrily slammed it back into its stand and in the process, knocked over a display of ceramic mugs. I had to pay for each broken mug. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 875

You deserved it 4 541

By foolmetwice - 16/05/2011 14:28

Today, I spilt a very hot cup of tea all over a burn I got yesterday from spilling a very hot cup of tea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 093

You deserved it 40 109

Mad bastards

By oof - 13/10/2022 21:00 - United States - Steele

Today, my cats decided to start sprinting back and forth across the house while I was holding a cup of coffee. They both ran into each of my legs in unison, sending me crashing down on top of them. I also hit my head on the corner of a shelf and spilled coffee all over my neck, in addition to breaking the cup. FML

I agree, your life sucks 888

You deserved it 191

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Top comments

FluffythePink 22

Wednesday 22 November 2023 10:33

When inanimate objects are out to get you...

Comments

FluffythePink 22

Wednesday 22 November 2023 10:33

When inanimate objects are out to get you...

Keywords

Work Christmas You're fired AITA Love Poopoo peepee Embarrassing Miscellaneous Mental health Health Relatable Romantic Break-ups Annoying Money Gross Ironic Argument Awkward Friends Cute Haircut Intimacy Sex Lonely Holidays Bosses Capitalism Cars Covid

The Top

Today, my girlfriend’s dad has a sword he inherited from his dad that he claims links their family to the old Swiss nobility. I work in a museum so I know most of the makers' marks on swords, so I’m not sure how to tell him his sword is a reproduction made in Spain less than 100 years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 447

You deserved it 88

Today, one of my 5-year-old son's teeth fell out, but he's quite scatterbrained and he lost it. He did however find my vibrating duck under my pillow, and is now crying because he thinks that I stole his tooth so that the tooth fairy would bring me a toy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 145

You deserved it 7 104

The Top

Today, my girlfriend of 3 years who had taken a job in a new city last month came into town and told me that she had slept with a co-worker last Friday. Last Friday I was incredibly lonely but I turned down a very attractive woman because I didn't want to hurt my girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 932

You deserved it 5 831

Today, at work, a customer told me that my teeth would make a very pretty necklace. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 356

You deserved it 1 982

Today, I told my wife that she gets 100% of me and I keep nothing from her. She told me she doesn't want it and that I should get counseling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 712

You deserved it 1 284

Today, my mother sent my birthday present to me four days late. It was a handy keychain blood alcohol detector so I can make sure I'm sober before I drive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 851

You deserved it 7 701

Today, while on a tour bus, our guide told us that "Jimi Hendrix was like, uh, the Miley Cyrus of the '60s." I'm actually a committed pacifist, but I was already halfway out of my seat to choke the pimply-faced twat out before I managed to restrain myself. Now I'm scared of myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 450

You deserved it 6 176

Today, at work my boss called me into his office because he had received multiple complaints from coworkers about a prank sound machine I have been using to make inappropriate fart sounds at my desk. I wish it was a fart machine; I have a condition. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 724

You deserved it 2 480