Intimacy: Hott

Hott

By purple - 24/03/2012 05:30 - United States - Katy

Today, my girlfriend decided to pleasure me with a handjob. It was incredibly painful because she didn't understand that my foreskin isn't as flexible as she thought it to be. I didn't have the heart to tell her to stop until she asked, "Is it supposed to turn this color?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 140

You deserved it 12 374

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Same thing different taste

By southernluxe - 04/09/2011 09:36 - United States

Today, I got my first handjob. She ripped out a pube. It hurt so bad my eyes teared up. She asked what was wrong and not wanting to make her feel guilty I had to tell her it was "Just so good." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 935

You deserved it 10 641

Newbie

By Anonymous - 25/11/2010 18:18 - Singapore

Today, while I was having sex with my girlfriend, I was struck with a white-hot pain, and in the confusion thought her vagina had contracted hard. It turned out it was actually my uncircumcised penis retracting for the first time in my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 603

You deserved it 7 718

Traumatized knob

By Anonymous - 10/03/2015 19:11

Today, I got my first handjob. I also found out today that a girl can pull your skin hard enough to cause it to bleed profusely. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 991

You deserved it 4 602

By Anonymous - 02/01/2012 17:30 - United States

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job when she started crying. Despite my pleas for her to stop and attempts to comfort her, she insisted that she continue. I feel like a monster. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 268

You deserved it 7 883

What kind of sex are you having?

By Anonymous - 30/12/2022 00:00

Today, after being apart for a few weeks, my girlfriend made love to me so hard I got bruises on my penis and it hurts to pee out of it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 003

You deserved it 445

By Anon. - 01/03/2011 23:51 - United States

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to stick her finger up my ass during sex. I screamed like a little girl and barely managed to finish. Afterward, she said, 'Now you know how it feels.' FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 607

You deserved it 90 939

By Anonymous - 24/04/2013 18:56 - United States - Huntington Park

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend for the first time, and she reached down to feel me up. When her hands got there, she stopped and said, "You're not even hard..." I was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 82 433

You deserved it 9 835

Milking it

By mperrotta913 - 21/05/2010 15:46 - United States

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job, which was great, until she started saying, "Milk the penis… Miiiiilk the penis…" FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 138

You deserved it 14 881

By Anonymous - 18/01/2014 22:55 - United States - Somerset

Today, while I was fooling around with my girlfriend, she hurt her hand. It obviously wasn't very serious, so I told her to stop faking it. She responded, "Wanna know what I actually fake? My orgasms." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 658

You deserved it 64 542

Throbbing

By 2in longer - 01/11/2016 12:57 - United States - Coldwater

Today, while laying in bed with my girlfriend, I felt her grab my manhood through a layer of blankets. I got a bit stiff, just in time for her to clench tight, and pull violently. She didn't know "it" was in her hand, as she was trying to cover herself with the blanket. My manhood is now red and swollen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 966

You deserved it 1 169

mrphychrs 5

Saturday 24 March 2012 12:28

how can she knows she's doin it wrong if you don't tell her? gotta let her know that kinda stuff bud

teague95 16

Saturday 24 March 2012 12:30

Take extreme pain instead of just saying "hey babe use some lube and be gentle"

Comments

ilyrainbow 2

Sunday 8 April 2012 0:22

I just died. XD Your poor penis. :[

Tinkertoy 7

Saturday 25 August 2012 2:00

Just be greatfull she didn't make it bleed...

sammyjo06 14

Friday 14 February 2014 4:32

You can tell way more guys read this site than girls based on how everyone votes. On FML's like this, everyone votes FML when it's 100% YDI. He says he didn't tell her...How is that not his fault? All he has to do is show her how he likes it. It's not that hard. It's completely his fault he was in pain.

carbonbasedcynic 17

Monday 12 May 2014 0:55

bro you have to speak up!!! that was your DING DONG on the line back there!!!!

larajade 10

Monday 14 July 2014 15:15

you need to be open about what you like and don't like with each other.

fantasyworld 37

Friday 24 October 2014 3:14

You deserve to be comfortable during sex, don't be afraid to speak up.

fantasyworld 37

Saturday 21 November 2015 4:01

You have to tell her this stuff, it's your sex life too.

InfiniteSecret 20

Wednesday 20 September 2017 18:40

You deserve it, for not telling her. It is no one's fault but your own. Even though you were trying to be nice you were doing more harm than good. Instead of telling her so she can learn and do better you let her do it wrong and cause you harm.