Kids and Parents: HELLO?

HELLO?

By wooowmom - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - Canada

Today, I learned that if I don't give my mom attention immediately after she calls my name, she will throw a baseball at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 161

You deserved it 10 799

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Top comments

holymolybro 0

Sunday 5 June 2011 8:57

Think fast! :D!

just_a_dude_ 0

Sunday 5 June 2011 9:00

Better watch out, the flying objects become more hazardous as time goes on. Next is a set of kitchen knives.

Comments

SpectSelf 0

Sunday 5 June 2011 9:23

pay attention then dumbass.

jackiemoonthepro 5

Sunday 5 June 2011 9:25

maybe it's the in thing to do these days?

BamBarBiYaKergud 2

Sunday 5 June 2011 9:25

wake up lol

OrgasmicBunnies 9

Sunday 5 June 2011 9:27

Think fast.

rhysfucker 24

Sunday 5 June 2011 9:30

I'm sorry, what were u saying? my dad used to count...1...2...3...whack!

soulfulemo 0

Sunday 5 June 2011 9:30

hope you have good reflexes ..if not, yell her name, and even if she answers..throw it back

sheethapins 13

Sunday 5 June 2011 9:33

She's just trying to knock some sense into you.

sydneymwfca 10

Sunday 5 June 2011 9:36

omgg! throw it back(:

Ann23 7

Sunday 5 June 2011 9:39

im sure that taught you to pay attention !

thebestof1984 0

Sunday 5 June 2011 9:40

child abuse.....

Keywords

Health Poopoo peepee Awkward Jewelry Family Fight Kids Love Work Relatable Students Animals Noise Birds Sleep Mental health Medication Contraception Racism Pregnancy Relationship advice Cheating Teenagers Friends Embarrassing Intimacy Sex Revenge Food Boredom

The Top

Today, I told my husband to stop his friendship with our neighbor’s 17 year-old daughter. They claim they just play video games together, but lately he’s been uninterested in sex and barely shows me any affection. He vehemently said, “It’s not like we’re fucking or anything! Chill!” and stormed out of the house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 649

You deserved it 126

Today, after spotting my ex-boyfriend's truck in a desolate parking lot, I decided to "decorate" the muddy side of it with a rather large male appendage. After checking around me to make sure there were no witnesses, I got to work. I probably should have made sure he wasn't sitting in the truck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 280

You deserved it 49 809

The Top

Today, while shopping for some bananas at my local grocery store, an old woman came up to me and started rubbing my stomach. She simply asked when I was due. I am a 43 year-old man with a beer belly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 632

You deserved it 14 906

Today, I signed my own plaster-cast to make people believe that I actually have friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 855

You deserved it 7 695

Today, my husband of three years told me he only proposed to me because his favorite football team was winning and he had been drunk. I had our second child three days ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 93 517

You deserved it 5 332

Today, I paid $500 for a gym membership after moving into a brand new house, since 12 years of software development has taken its toll. When I told my instructor about my goal to lose 35lbs in two months, he simply said, "Yeah... That's not going to happen. Try another gym," and left promptly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 355

You deserved it 4 195

Today, my mother-in-law yanked my corset so tight that I shit myself. While wearing my dress. On my wedding day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 548

You deserved it 398

Today, after my wife said I could decide what to do with our spare room, I decided to make a home gym. She hasn't stopped ranting about "patriarchal diet culture" and "unrealistic body expectations" since. I just wanted to get fit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 117

You deserved it 123