Today, I was watching Ratatouille. Piece of advice for starving students: never watch it when you've only eaten two apples in two days, or you'll find yourself in the ridiculous position of being jealous of a fucking rat. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, school tuition has taken up so much of my paycheck that the only thing I had to eat for dinner was applesauce. FML
Today, my family and I watched Madagascar 2. When we got to the part where Gloria the hippopotamus is praised for her chunkyness, my little sister looked at me and said, "If you were a hippo, maybe then you would get a date." FML
Today, I spent the only money I had left for lunch only to take two bites before a seagull snatched my burger from my hands. I had to shamefully start walking back to work with a pair of girls laughing at me and an empty stomach. FML
Today, I realized I’m so lonely that I actually got jealous while watching Shrek. FML
Today, I ate an apple. My sister then walks in dressed as a witch, and asks, "Have you seen my poisoned apple?" She was playing at Snow White, and the apple had been dipped in the toilet, the cat's food bowl and the garbage can. FML
Today, I learned why the phrase "seafood taco salad" terrifies everyone in the school's cafeteria. What happened to me after eating it made Saw III look like a Disney movie. FML
Today, I dreamed a rat crawled up from the toilet and attacked me. Now I'm afraid to even enter the bathroom. FML
Today, I've been broke for so long that I felt a pang of envy when a character in a movie said that that they'd bought a tiny cup from a gift shop. FML
Today, I watched Gigli. FML
Today, after being robbed last week, I had no money to go to the store for food. Instead, my dinner consisted of two Tums chewables in tropical fruit flavors. After not eating all day, I thought they actually tasted pretty good. FML
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Top comments
Askzombie 14
Anyone can cook, but only the fearless can be great-gusteau
beaverteaser 16
living the whole apple a day ?
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Comments (75)
lousypotatoes 20
... jealous of a ******* ANIMATED rat.
Omniprism 15
Do you not have any free food places over there? Ask a church for help. Hope you get help soon.
MummyRavyne 14
Of course there's places/organisations in the UK that supply food to those that NEED it. But I have worked in soup kitchens and I've heard some of the food parcels that people get is either out of date or the receiver has no means of cooking. Get a job OP, you're just stupid if you've got access to internet and watching movies when you could be working and not complaining and feeling jealous of a cartoon rodent.
iluvferrets 13
He is a student, he could get a part time job I suppose depending on his schedule, but he needs internet and a computer of some kind for school.
Merylwen 24
Getting a job, especially one that fits around study time, is easier said than done.
Coeliacchic93 21
the foodbank gives 3 days emergency food when someone is in crisis. this may not be OP's fault. a lot of people can have a crisis, maybe they do have a job but had an unexpected bill. it can and does happen.
Thunderlaxus 10
could've seen that one coming
TawnyAnarchy 7
The people in this thread OBVIOUSLY missed the part where he said a few weeks. 'Duh!'
rbalboa76 5
Living on an apple a day gives the doctor pay
outoftown 27
Check your school's events calendar for events with refreshments. A little feigned interest and discreet snarfing can carry you over. Also, check with managers of campus eateries near closing time for leftovers; takes a bite out of your pride, but fills your belly. (And you won't be the first student to do it!) Good luck!
Manouu_fml 6
I'm French and I've heard that it was impossible for you to say "Ratatouille", so below the title was written "Rat-a-toe"... Is that true ?!
6piecechknuggt 4
Nothing wrong with going home and visiting mum for a bit(e).
Sparx1_1 16
Not sure where you go to school OP but most schools have programs to help students with food. My son's university has a food bank for students and a student run farmers market (extreme discounts on fresh food) and a bunch of other food programs run by various organizations at the school. You should be able to get more info at your student union. If you're using a dining card you can also make that last longer by taking extra food "to go" for later in the day to cut down on trips to the dining hall and make your punch card last longer - there are tips all over the internet about it.