Accident, Morning and Wake up: Good morning

Good morning

By Elliot - 22/07/2010 15:10 - United Kingdom

Today, I lifted up my blinds, only for them to detach from the wall, hit me on the head, knock a pile of paper over, spill a can of Pepsi, leave plaster all over the floor and a gaping hole in the wall above my window. FML

agreeclassic 36 164

vote type 1 4 338

The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. More…

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By Michael - 25/10/2011 15:00 - Australia

Today, while taking pills for a headache, I threw my head back to help get the pills down, and in the process, whacked it against the brick windowsill behind me. FML

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By 3lavyaa - 07/10/2009 12:31 - United Kingdom

Today, I woke up and the sun was blinding me through my attic window. I have no blinds so I got a poster from my wall and stuck it to the wood on my window with nails. Turns out I have wood rot, and my entire window fell out. FML

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Today, I tried to open my water bottle, which is like trying to open a pickle jar, and after several seconds, it exploded all over my desk and clothes. Then, when I was going to get paper towels and a change of clothes, I slipped on the puddle and hit my head on my desk as I came crashing down. FML

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By Anonymous - 03/12/2025 12:00

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By but why - 21/08/2018 23:30

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Thrashed

By Ringo McDingo - this FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, while I was sleeping, I managed to knock down the curtains by my bed. That would explain the gash on my head and blood on my bed. FML

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By Anonymous - 27/04/2009 05:58 - United States

Today, at work, I managed to hit myself in the face with a large sheet pan. The force made me back into a shelf, which knocked a box off the top, which hit me in the head and knocked me out-cold. I now have a fat lip, a sore head, and bruises all over from the fall. FML

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Walnut head

By Anonymous - 16/03/2017 02:00

Today, after sweeping up a spill, I managed to break the cupboard door. With my head. FML

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Make it stop!

By DBR - 23/04/2009 10:45 - United States

Today, my alarm went off. I reached to swat it, missed, slipped, smacked my face on my dresser, and fell on the floor. As I picked myself up off the floor, I hit my head on the open top drawer of my other dresser. In 30 seconds of consciousness, I was attacked by two pieces of furniture. FML

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I don't know my strength

By Anonymous - 09/01/2022 06:01 - Australia - Perth

Today, I gave the back door a slight nudge to make sure it was latched shut. Of course, it flew wide open, causing me to smash my face into the doorframe, fall out onto the back porch writhing in pain, and have blood pissing out of my face. FML

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MrCalves 1

Thursday 22 July 2010 19:19

sounds like a massive clusterf*ck

OwNowBrownCow 0

Thursday 22 July 2010 19:21

Should have had a V8 instead.

Comments

gabbster95 0

Thursday 22 July 2010 20:55

PESI !!!!

cantfightfate 0

Thursday 22 July 2010 20:56

mountain dew ftw!!

mobchick16 0

Thursday 22 July 2010 20:59

clutz much?

Chelberry 0

Thursday 22 July 2010 21:01

Epic faaaaaail

just_laugh_along 0

Thursday 22 July 2010 21:07

There goes a perfectly good can of Pepsi.

selenagirl_fml 0

Thursday 22 July 2010 21:22

smoooooooth.... ydi for trying to impress your neighbor... lol jk FYL op

mak3_1t_ra1n 0

Friday 23 July 2010 6:17

not to be a creeper or anything but ur definitely attractive. fact.

illmatic2 16

Thursday 22 July 2010 21:37

I would have loved to see this in real life.

spaceboyftw 0

Thursday 22 July 2010 21:49

whaaat the fuuuck. edit: mountan dew!!!!!

956TXking 0

Thursday 22 July 2010 21:53

No cry

zach55 0

Thursday 22 July 2010 21:52

YDI for lifting the blinds

love_musik 0

Thursday 22 July 2010 22:02

definatly dr pepper ftw

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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Today, my girlfriend broke up with me, and totally forgot about my existence. She doesn’t even text me, and I think there’s someone else, but she has my name tattooed on her body. Love sucks, I don’t recommend it. FML

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Today, I was in a quiet library, trying to stifle a sneeze. In the process, I let out an embarrassingly loud and dramatic snort that echoed through the room. Heads turned. Many stared. FML

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Today, I told my boyfriend about my foot phobia. To help me "get over it", he took his socks off, pinned me down, and rubbed his foot against my face until I started sobbing. FML

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Today, I went out for some very expensive sushi. Two hours later, I found myself on the toilet, violently voiding my bowels. I essentially paid to have liquid orange shit. FML

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Today, I passed by a cute girl who was staring intensely at me. When I glanced in her direction, she smiled. Taking this as a positive sign, I approached her. Before I could say anything, she handed me a flyer explaining the benefits of STD testing. Apparently, I look like I need it. FML

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