Health: Get out

Get out

By pipefitter28 - 27/12/2012 06:46 - Canada - Vernon

Today, I tried to impress a girl at the gym on the squat rack, but let out a big fart. She was grossed out and laughed at me with her friends. Her boyfriend came over and told me I was a dead man, and I'd better leave. I'm now the proud owner of a year membership at a gym I can't go to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 125

You deserved it 28 891

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Same thing different taste

By Mark - 30/03/2009 07:06 - United States

Today, I was working out at the gym doing squats. There was a girl there that I wanted to impress so I loaded up the bar with a lot of weight and began to do my squat. As I was going down I farted so loud that I began to laugh and fell backwards. Everyone in the room just stared at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 446

You deserved it 74 933

By Anonymous - 27/10/2009 10:28 - United Kingdom

Today, in the gym, as I bent over to pick up my weights an old man farted right in my face. The stench was appalling. To make matters worse, a girl I've fancied for ages thought it was me and reported it to the instructor. I was told to leave for 'anti-social behavior'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 614

You deserved it 2 938

By desigymrat - 25/12/2010 05:29 - France

Today, I was working out at the gym. A very attractive girl was watching me work out, so feeling like a stud, I tried to lift a really heavy weight. I failed, got trapped, and watched helplessly as she walked away laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 508

You deserved it 42 592

By YuckyDuckyLucky - 03/06/2015 17:36 - Norway - Oslo

Today, I attempted to break the record for the heaviest squat in my local gym. A small crowd witnessed me breaking the record as well as releasing a huge fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 837

You deserved it 5 826

By authorsubmit - 04/05/2012 12:49 - United States

Today, I was at the gym trying to impress a hot girl, so I put an extra 30 pounds on the bar, I lowered, pushed... and pooped. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 860

You deserved it 47 640

By Dancing King - 07/08/2014 15:36 - Norway - Egersund

Today, I went with my girlfriend to the gym for the first time. I knew I was in bad shape, but I bet her that I could lift more than her. Not only did I get my ass handed to me by a 5', 115lbs girl in front of the entire gym, I also have to attend Zumba in bright pink spandex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 355

You deserved it 43 230

By Farterella - 02/11/2016 20:30

Today, I was the only girl in gym class who couldn't lift the weight, and the only one to fart multiple times during the attempt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 771

You deserved it 1 552

Core

By Anonymous - 18/03/2023 16:00

Today, I went to the gym and accidentally farted during yoga class. Everyone looked at me and the instructor said, "Let's all take a moment to appreciate the power of core strength." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 101

You deserved it 157

Not funny, Graham

By Anonymous - 25/10/2023 22:00

Today, I was at the gym when my dad thought it would be funny to push me into the ladies' changing room. Over a dozen naked women didn’t think it was funny. I was slapped twice, police were called, I’m now banned from my favourite gym for life, and even my wife is giving me dirty looks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 922

You deserved it 125

By yogapants - 24/09/2010 20:21 - Switzerland

Today, I let out the most horrific, loudest, and most vile smelling fart I have ever had in my life while in the middle of yoga class. Out of embarrassment, I tried to lessen the tension in the silent room by giggling, but no one saw the funny side. I was given looks of horror, and avoided by everyone else for the rest of the class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 247

You deserved it 14 863

krizay 10

Thursday 27 December 2012 12:19

You can still go to that gym. You are not going by choice.

Arthurie 30

Thursday 27 December 2012 12:21

Now hold on a minute, you can't necessarily "never" go to this gym. Perhaps just go when the girl or her boyfriend isn't there? You could always tell management of some sort - if a guy is going to call you a dead man for accidentally farting, something isn't right in his head.

Comments

DenBriZel 31

Friday 15 November 2013 12:25

Just go to the gym, get buff and then take him down when he tries to fight you.

JoelsLastNight 18

Wednesday 1 January 2014 14:03

Really dont be a pussy just go.

Jebitesevsi 11

Wednesday 22 January 2014 13:07

Be adult about this! Go to the gym, and if the guy gives you problems, file harassment charges!

shaunr40k 20

Sunday 15 June 2014 15:52

Man up

Lunasis 14

Friday 18 July 2014 13:01

0-o for god sakes be a man. not gonna impress anyone by curling up in the corner

NostalgiaFreak9 41

Monday 19 October 2015 2:10

Does he own the gym? He can't threaten you out like that even if he does own it.

NostalgiaFreak9 41

Tuesday 22 March 2016 20:21

*doesn't

nellyphant 18

Friday 25 December 2015 11:20

Report him theres absolutely no reason for him to want you "dead" you farted in front of his girl friend so what?! Tell the gym owner he threatened you and get them to revoke his membership!