Today, in the gym, as I bent over to pick up my weights an old man farted right in my face. The stench was appalling. To make matters worse, a girl I've fancied for ages thought it was me and reported it to the instructor. I was told to leave for 'anti-social behavior'. FML
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By
2step
| 1
WTF? Reported and kicked out for farting? Is it some nazi gym?
By
FreddyLunch
| 0
"Fancied" is such a British thing to say, I'm glad that you are keeping it British and didn't say you had a crush on her.
Comments
By
Brave_Sir_Robin
| 4
You don't have to lie, OP. Just claim it proudly, leave your best SBD (Silent But Deadly) and haul ass.
That'll teach the snitch.
That'll teach the snitch.
Reply
blastvortex
| 3
Agreed. Of course, since the old duffer will probably (eventually) do it again, those three will also likely get their just desserts from their own stupidity as well.
Reply
pingpongpickle
| 8
they kick people out for farting?
By
FreddyLunch
| 0
"Fancied" is such a British thing to say, I'm glad that you are keeping it British and didn't say you had a crush on her.
Reply
violentturtle
| 0
LOL! YDI for being British.
By
duckorange
| 0
"He who smelt it dealt it"
Reply
wtfismyfml
| 0
said the rhyme committed the crime!
Reply
mcgugs
| 0
irony...
By
2step
| 1
WTF? Reported and kicked out for farting? Is it some nazi gym?
Reply
violentturtle
| 0
LMAO @ #12. They are British...
Reply
Darrus
| 0
In Austria, some guy got fined for farting next to a police officer^^.
I'm not sure if he really had to pay in the end though...
I'm not sure if he really had to pay in the end though...
By
956TXking
| 0
this reminds me of pineapple express... was that a fart.. I can taste it lol
By
AdviceDog
| 0
▒▒▒▒▒EAT FARTS░░░░░
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░░░░░░▓▓█▓▒▒▒▒▒
░░░FOR NUTRITION▒▒▒▒
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░░░FOR NUTRITION▒▒▒▒
Reply
toink
| 0
Aww! Cute dog! Here, have a cookie!
By
FerrariCake
| 2
Why would you bend down to pick up weights near an old man's ass? Couldn't you have chosen some other weights?
Sounds like you chose the weights you did so that when you farted you thought you could blame it on the old guy.
Sounds like you chose the weights you did so that when you farted you thought you could blame it on the old guy.
By
theshow8812
| 0
kicked out for farting. that sucks. "When you pick up weights,you fart" that happens. At least it means you have perfect body. lol
By
Jewelofagal
| 2
While amusing, this is not a believable story in many respects. Nice try, though.
By
perdix
| 29
Sherlock Holmes on the case! Have the instructor make the girl smell your ass and the old man's ass. She might have to wedge her nose into your cracks to positively ID the fart. The guilty party must leave.
Elementary, my dear Watson.
Elementary, my dear Watson.
Reply
Brave_Sir_Robin
| 4
I am intrigued by your ingenuity, perdix, and would like to subscribe to your newsletter.
Reply
bsias4ever
| 0
ahahahahahahahah...good one!!! lmfao. xD
Reply
koribis
| 0
Made my day. Easily :)