Today, I went on a date with a very cute girl. It went well, until I accidentally called the blueberries in her dessert Oran Berries. I sheepishly explained that they're a berry from the Pokémon universe, at which point she excused herself, never to return. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I went on a date with the world's biggest lightweight. She got blind drunk on wine before dessert, and slurred, "You look like... like a black... blueberry." Amused, I said, "You mean a blackberry?" She stared at me for several long seconds, confused, then passed out. Check please. FML
Today, I was on my third date with a really hot girl. A guy walked by singing the Pokémon theme song. She started making fun of the guy, mocking his immaturity. I joined in, in order to keep the conversation going. Everything was going great but then my phone rang. It's the Pokémon theme song. FML
Today, I had to explain to my friend that a blue raspberry is not a blackberry, and that blue raspberry is an artificial flavor, not a fruit. This explanation took much longer than it should have. FML
Today, I went on a date to the zoo. I soon found out that my date had eaten several hash brownies before entering. FML
Today, I went on a date. Met the guy at the restaurant, everything seemed to be going OK, but then he spent the entire dinner talking about Pokemon GO, and wouldn't let me say a word. He suddenly stops talking, gets up, says he, "doesn't feel a connection" and leaves. I had to pay the bill. FML
Today, I went on a date with a fun, attractive girl. She ordered off the kid's menu, drowned her food in ketchup, and said my burger with blue cheese and bacon was disgusting. FML
Today, I ended up in the hospital by accidentally eating poisonous berries, from a plant that I've known since childhood to be poisonous, which I also recognized as belonging to the nightshade family. I still don’t understand what made them look tasty. Brain fart of the century, I guess. FML
Today, I went out on a date with a cute girl. Everything was going great, until the food arrived. She not only shoveled food into her mouth like it was going to run away, she also smacked, sucked her fingers and laughed out loud with her mouth completely full. It was like dining with a 5-year-old. FML
Today, I took a girl on a date. Her and her imaginary friends. FML
Today, I was on a date with this girl. I attempted to put my arm around her, but I elbowed her in the face instead. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thank you, your FML was submitted, and will appear the moderation soon!
Top comments
rikitsumiatsu 11
If she doesn't respect pokémon she doesn't deserve respect.
alexhaz64 4
You're better off this way. You need someone who can appreciate Pokemon!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (159)
monkiki62 5
I would have been impressed op. shes apparently stuck up and not worth it.
ThePieGuy0817 29
Looks like you won't be touching her Watmel Berries tonight, if you know what I mean. Yeah, that was really bad...
HyvaaPaskaan 3
Real women play Pokemon
saywhaaaaaaaaa 1
I would have taken you home.
jami3m 4
but but but Pokemon is amazing.
eyesmile27 7
Nerds will soon be a commodity. Don't worry. Her loss.
ekki8975 3
Guess she doesn't deserve your Poke balls.
xxsakuraxx 29
Don't feel bad. She doesn't deserve you anyway. Once while I was at school waiting for my ride, I was reading The Hunger Games and bee flew in my face. I screamed "tracker jacker!" at the top of my lungs and freaked out.
menzoenlacabeza 2
never mention pokemon in a date
envyelric 6
Sounds like a stuck up bitch.