Health: Fresh and not Fit

Fresh and not Fit

By Anonymous - 14/06/2011 01:08 - United States

Today, I ran out of breath while mowing the lawn. I was on a riding lawn mower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 815

You deserved it 54 625

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 09/05/2009 15:50 - United States

Today, I had to mow the lawn with a weedwacker because it rained a lot the past week and the push mower was broken. I started "mowing", and forgetting that I am mowing where the dogs go to the restroom, I absent-mindedly weedwack over dog poop. Which got flung into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 966

You deserved it 26 208

By Anonymous - 02/04/2012 02:25 - United States - Binghamton

Today, while mowing the lawn, I ran over a hornet's nest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 941

You deserved it 3 434

By What. - 14/08/2013 00:08 - United States - Pawtucket

Today, my father bought a riding lawn mower. We don't have a lawn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 064

You deserved it 3 561

By jobless - 16/05/2012 07:36 - United States - Groton

Today, I found out that I am allergic to grass, and not supposed to mow lawns. My job is mowing lawns. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 052

You deserved it 2 402

Mowed down

By ThatsNotGrass - 10/08/2014 01:30 - Canada

Today, I was mowing the lawn while wearing gym shorts. Because I had no pockets, I tucked my phone into the waistband of my shorts. I didn't notice my phone had slipped until the lawnmower started making an awful sound. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 290

You deserved it 22 504

Health is overrated

By Anonymous - 16/03/2022 12:00

Today, trying to get into shape because I run out of breath after walking more than 30 minutes, I started to hit the gym. Too bad my legs didn’t want to cooperate and decided that it would cause limping-worthy pain for every step I took on the treadmill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 772

You deserved it 182

By Jack Shart Jr. - 08/07/2015 15:16 - United States

Today, I'm so out of shape that I got winded from getting out of bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 058

You deserved it 18 029

Yesterday's news

By rofld - 14/07/2010 16:47 - United States

Today, I ran over a newspaper with the lawnmower, instantly volunteering myself to pick up confetti for hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 851

You deserved it 28 053

By waltzy777 - 26/04/2009 08:12 - United States

Today, we were having a family get together at my house. Because of this, i had to mow our lawn to make sure it looked nice. I got a little bored and decided it would be funny to cut a rather large penis into my yard. right when i finished, i ran out of gas. My 83 year old grandmother saw. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 608

You deserved it 83 019

By tash - 24/05/2011 12:33 - Canada

Today, while I was mowing the lawn in my backyard, I ran over a glass bottle. My legs looked like a disco ball. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 968

You deserved it 9 452

kut19 6

Tuesday 14 June 2011 8:37

how fat are you?

Keffin 0

Tuesday 14 June 2011 8:42

"gotta work out my muscles with my steering wheel" -pants-

Comments

IvoryDragon 0

Wednesday 15 June 2011 7:54

Today, I realised im a fat lazy slob that nobody will ever love, because I ran out of breath on a ******* RIDEING LAWNMOWER

vRaw 0

Wednesday 15 June 2011 8:23

Thats kinda sad actually... :'(

msabot 0

Wednesday 15 June 2011 9:15

If you also have wheezing or chest tightness you're probably having a bad allergic reaction.

MsMeiriona 2

Wednesday 15 June 2011 11:13

severe allergies or asthma are the only justification for this.

okieraider71 4

Wednesday 15 June 2011 12:20

You are a heavy smoker--right??

Mish44 3

Wednesday 15 June 2011 14:50

Jenny Craig that body!

kike66 0

Wednesday 15 June 2011 15:37

damn that sux loose some weight

LifeIsCruelFML 0

Wednesday 15 June 2011 16:36

LOL.

FuckOurLivesFOL_fml 0

Wednesday 15 June 2011 18:05

maybe u should push the riding mower meg

seanjuro 0

Wednesday 15 June 2011 18:47

u should probably see a doc

Keywords

Miscellaneous Weird Shopping My ex Awkward Family Relatable Racism Love AITA Kids Cheating Work Break-ups Animals Cute Cats Sex Intimacy Relationship advice Coworkers Alcohol Psychology Health Mental health Neighbours Cops Scary Stressed out Parents

The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. I'm extremely uncomfortable with eye contact, but he kept staring into my eyes the entire time. I had to sing the F.U.N. song from Spongebob in my head to stop myself having an anxiety attack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 207

You deserved it 6 457

Today, I was getting it on with a girl I've been talking to for three months. She's a year younger than me and it was her first time. So, I went easy. After five minutes she started crying. When I asked her what was wrong, she said that I reminded her of her dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 81 390

You deserved it 7 418

The Top

Today, I went to work 300 miles away from where I live. I couldn't find my customer's address, so I decided to call him. I'd picked up my wireless house phone instead of my mobile. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 362

You deserved it 9 621

Today, after thinking I smelled the aroma of stale alcohol, I asked my husband, who is a recovering alcoholic, if he has been completely honest with me about all that he has been doing. Bracing myself to hear about his fall off the wagon, I instead heard a confession of adultery. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 095

You deserved it 4 458

Today, I was laid off on the day I was about to put in an offer on a house. This company promised me the world, and I broke myself working to prove my worth. Turns out, I wasn't getting paid for the lunches and breaks I didn't take either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 111

You deserved it 152

Today, without realizing it, I just overstepped what is known in business as "The Competence Zone." Now any work that needs to get done properly (AKA all of it) is foisted off onto my overworked ass because I'm the only one who can do the work both competently and quickly. All I did was do the work I was given. FML

I agree, your life sucks 770

You deserved it 133

Today, I was drinking coffee at work, while being surrounded by a lot of flies in the area I was working. Later, in the evening, I found a fly under my bottom denture plate. It'd been there for about 12 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 693

You deserved it 130

Today, I realized that the homeless people I give change to all dress better than I do, including the one that doesn't believe in pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 062

You deserved it 25 342