Sex, Weird and Intimacy: Enticing - FML

Enticing

By Anonymous - 20/06/2014 21:19 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, I was feeling frisky and asked my boyfriend if he wanted a blowjob. He said, "Fuck no", then rolled over to go to sleep. FML

agreeclassic 57 331

vote type 1 9 646

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Similar FMLs

Double standard

By NoSexForMe - 13/07/2014 07:46 - United States - Rancho Cucamonga

Spicy

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he could finally go down on me. He said, "No, that's disgusting" and then asked me for a blowjob. FML

agreeclassic 67 857

vote type 1 8 666

Make your mind up!

By nextcontestant16 - 19/11/2012 15:12 - United States

Spicy

Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend by waking him up with a blowjob, because he had always told me that it was a sexy fantasy of his. When he finally woke up, he got pissed off, rudely accused me of interrupting his beauty sleep, then soundly lay back down and fell asleep again. FML

agreeclassic 41 666

vote type 1 5 143

By Anonymous - 14/03/2011 19:16 - United States

Spicy

Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He responded by asking for a blowjob. FML

agreeclassic 50 023

vote type 1 14 605

Gimme the D

By Anonymous - 07/02/2024 11:00 - United States - Citrus Heights

Spicy

Today, I wanted to have sex with my boyfriend, but he kept falling asleep while I was giving him a handjob. Ugh, no sex. FML

agreeclassic 364

vote type 1 283

By omgwhyme - 08/01/2012 14:36 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend asked me for a blow job. After I said "no" over ten times, he decided to get up and slap me across the face with his penis. FML

agreeclassic 56 478

vote type 1 49 371

Major red flag

By Anonymous - 25/02/2023 05:00 - United Kingdom - Ashfield

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend has been super nice to me all day and I was enjoying the attention. At bedtime, he asked me if I was happy, I said yes, he asked if was I happy enough to try butt stuff. I said no, like I do every time he asks for butt stuff. He turned over and went to sleep. So much for being nice. FML

agreeclassic 1 616

vote type 1 631

By Anonymous - 07/04/2015 21:00 - Canada - Calgary

Spicy

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend repeatedly whispering in my ear, "You want to give me a blowjob". Yes, he actually thought it would work. FML

agreeclassic 35 059

vote type 1 4 690

By dummy - 17/02/2012 00:03 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting frisky in bed. He mumbled something that sounded like "I love you." I replied "I love you too baby", to which he laughed then said, "I said I wanted you to blow me." FML

agreeclassic 32 755

vote type 1 5 672

So generous

By noway - 10/08/2011 17:47 - Singapore

Spicy

Today, I got into a fight with my boyfriend. The only thing he could think of to cheer me up was to give me "permission" to give him a blowjob. FML

agreeclassic 40 200

vote type 1 7 115

By anon - 27/07/2015 04:43 - United States

Spicy

Today, I tried to wake my boyfriend up to sex. When I went to touch his penis, he elbowed me in the face, mumbled an apology and began snoring again. FML

agreeclassic 29 598

vote type 1 5 973

Next

TOP COMMENTS

Kamon97 23

Saturday 21 June 2014 5:36

Maybe he was really tired? :s

EdenCrystal 21

Saturday 21 June 2014 5:39

This isn't really relevant but next time he does this you should say "Fine, then can you give me one?" and see his reaction

Comments

blackychan63 12

Sunday 22 June 2014 15:20

you must suck at sucking then -.o

monagro 22

Sunday 22 June 2014 16:39

I presume you've never denied sex to him?

morpanda 9

Sunday 22 June 2014 16:57

**** much?

ridl_14 3

Sunday 22 June 2014 18:03

Are you really calling this girl a **** for offering her partner a ********? Good luck with your future wife/girlfriend who you'd presumably need to hate sex, ya freak

ridl_14 3

Sunday 22 June 2014 18:04

Unless you're a girl, in which case, good luck being single and celibate forever if you've got so many issues with sex...ya freak

morpanda 9

Sunday 22 June 2014 16:59

I'd say he's perfect... I'd rather snuggle than get a ******** if I was a guy.. I'd call you a **** and tell you to find a man ***** for you, not me...

jayjaybusby 13

Sunday 22 June 2014 17:53

He's gay

Thatguy334 7

Sunday 22 June 2014 18:07

Maybe you suck at ********?

RainbowBitch15 11

Sunday 22 June 2014 19:41

My fiancé said, "What an idiot." about your boyfriend declining the *******. xD

shufflyn 16

Monday 23 June 2014 2:44

tell him **** no next time he wants one.

Hackzorer 8

Monday 23 June 2014 4:17

I wouldn't want one because then I would feel disgusted if I kissed her ever again

meatpop1965 3

Monday 23 June 2014 4:34

Either he was real tired or maybe turning gay or you just suck at giving blow jobs

7
8
9
10
11
12
13
14

VDM sur Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Top

Top

Today, I met with a friend who had gained some weight since I saw him last. After a friendly hug, I put my hand on his new man boob and, without thinking, left it there way too long. I realized that I was groping him and, in a panic, did the only thing I could think of. I patted it. Twice. FML

agreeclassic 18 016

vote type 1 54 729

Today, it's been two years since I graduated with my master's. It's also been the same amount of time since I've been looking for a job. I got an e-mail yesterday from a company for a telephone interview which I was happy about. The day of the interview, my phone is disconnected. FML

agreeclassic 11 007

vote type 1 1 019

Today, I'm stuck at my future brother-in-law’s Bachelor party. Ten guys I don’t know, who are all younger than me. It turns out two of them have been fucking since High School, and it’s an open secret in their group. I won’t out them, but only cause I don’t care enough to remember names. FML

agreeclassic 496

vote type 1 854

Today, after I was invited to a party a few days ago, I was removed from the group as the “maximum was 35”, but the host promised me to add me back if there was space left. I was just informed by my other friend that there’s now 60 people in the group, and that the host simply didn’t want me to come. FML

agreeclassic 1 152

vote type 1 124

Today, my girlfriend and I had an argument about wanting kids, as I want to have kids but she doesn’t. I explained the situation to my sister. She just kicked me in the nuts and said, “There, problem solved.” FML

agreeclassic 1 602

vote type 1 485

Today, I achieved a personal goal by completing a half-marathon for charity, despite being overweight and unfit before training. When I finished I cried, not because I was proud of myself, but because I ran the last 2 miles while being followed by kids on bicycles calling me a "fat cunt". FML

agreeclassic 71 539

vote type 1 5 650