Um, I'm a moron who has bought into this idiotic trendy idea of a "soulmate" and am willing to trash a normal marriage to pursue a lust-driven fantasy because it's more exciting. That's how you do it.

soulmate doesn't always mean romantically

Once you make the “purchase” you stop shopping because continuing to shop will only leave you feeling unhappy. That applies to a lot of things… In my observation, there is no such thing as a “soulmate” or “the one and only person who is destined to be your ideal mate.” There are better and worse compatibles between people. There are multiple potential people who you will love and who will love you… You don’t usually “find” another “soulmate” unless you are looking - Which means OP already was shopping for a better deal than their spouse. And that’s not a good thing. If your relationship or marriage is making you unhappy and if with honest communication you cannot correct things, then it’s time for a breakup or divorce. In my view only a morally disreputable person stays in a relationship while looking for a better option.

you don't tell your wife. you leave your "soul mate." the fantasy and lust will die down before long and you'll realize you ruined a happy home for nothing

sounds more like lust to me. grass isn't greener it just seems like it from afar. if you've already been seeing someone else your a scumbag. Hopefully not. you need to first date your wife. fall back in love. marriage is work and you fall in and out of love with your spouse many times over many years. mostly due to boring mundane life. you get in a rutt. if you truly want out of your marriage you need to earn your way out. don't be a douch