Today, I celebrated my birthday. My mom invited a bunch of my relatives over, and they started telling funny stories of when I was a kid. My mom decided that then was an appropriate time to talk about how she caught me looking at porn the other night. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my dad uploaded his porn collection onto our family server. My mom was convinced I did it and sat me down for a long talk. FML
Today, I went to my friend's house because his family was having a move away party for him. Everything was going good until his dad decided to give a toast. Including an anecdote about how he walked in on us watching porn together. FML
Today, it's my 18th birthday. I was telling my friends a story when my mom started talking. I simply said 'Mom...' so she'd realize she interrupted me. She gave me the finger and called me rude in front of all my friends. FML
Today, my girlfriend's family came over and I thought it would be fun to watch old family videos of when I was a kid. A few minutes into my fifth birthday party, I excused myself and went to grab some snacks for everyone. I returned to realize I had recorded porn over my family videos. FML
Today, I turned 18. My dad congratulated me and gifted me his collection of old porn magazines. Not bad, dad, but perhaps not during family dinner next time. FML
Today, it was my birthday. I only got one message, from my dad, which was a sexual image meant for my mother. FML
Today, it's my birthday. After a day out partying, I came home to find all my stuff smashed in the yard, even my 42" plasma TV. After asking my girlfriend what her problem was, she said a "slut" left a message on the machine stating how fun last night was. It turned out to be my mom. FML
Today, my mom had a talk with me while my dad was out. She said to stop using her lotion for my masturbation sessions. I asked her how long did she know. She replied with, "Ever since we put up that camera in the living room for burglars, where you happen to watch your porn." FML
Today, my mother came into my room and had a thirty minute long conversation with me. She kept looking very nervous and uncomfortable. Only after she left did I realize that a porn site was open on my computer screen. The entire time. FML
Today, I was watching porn and found my mom on a webcam. When I told her that I saw her, she just took away my computer and told me to get off porn. FML
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Top comments
suppressed08 2
Good times...Goood times...
Serec 0
ahem, I watch **** on my iPod all night.
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Comments (158)
GarryG 0
I've been watching **** since I was 8. now I'm 17... still haven't been caught. o.O
mdog13 1
**** is meant fit the iPhone and iPod touch case closed
livetodisco 0
hhahahaaha!
BreezyEffBabehh 0
DAYUM! Desperate Muchh? Get A Blow Up Doll(:
mycomment 0
it's funny because you guys are hitting on 16 but her picture isn't really all that lol hideous actually :)
fiery_ginger 0
I love how I found this in the intimacy category
kay729 7
it's my birthday today too! :D
dickster 0
What the hell? WHY IN GOD'S HOLY NAME IS TGIS UNDER INTIMACY?!?!? So did you watch **** while doing your mom or are you a believer that riding solo counts as sex? I hope it's the latter.
xXshotsXx 0
hahaha I'm with 75
Kuuroneko17 2
Was it Alec ****?
Mumbellosity711 0
I would have shown the realtives the ****. they would have understood