Lol you deserved it for trying to, "get some action," from women at a bar. Stuff like this is why women think guys are scumbags.

Some girls go 'to get action' too you you know. Not all, but enough.

No 42, stuff like that isn't why women think guys are douche bags. Douche baggery generally only comes into play when the guy (or girl, it goes both ways) is way too aggressive, and doesn't seem to understand the concept of rejection. Going into a club filled with young people looking for a good time with the hope of getting laid doesn't make him a douche bag.

Exactly, a quiet night at home with a small group of friends is all I need.

Chip, penny, and used napkin. The gangs all here

All I need is my imagination. Not much else to do here in my padded one room apartment. Isn't that right Mr. Sock hand? (Goofy voice) "Uh yup yup Mr. Saxon, you got that right" . Mwahahahaha.

Low expectations named matched his comment so accurately.

What's that magical place where no one gets hurt? Oh right ! INDOORS .

#11 all I need is some food and a computer

No it won't...

Hey kids one time in 2014 60 years ago I went clubbing to get drunk and have sex but instead I got vomited on by a drunk man

what does OP mean ?

Original poster in this case meaning the person who wrote the FML on a thread you'd call the person who make the thread an OP since they're the first person to post aka the original poster

It's a new look, don't you know?

That would almost be ok, aside from spelling and the fact that OP is male.

Dammit! I always think of a clever comment, then I forget one vital detail.

I wouldn't go as far as saying "clever comment".