By Unreasonable - 23/3/2020 14:00 - United Kingdom - Bath

Bridezilla vs. the Coronavirus

Today, I received a threatening DM from my so-called best friend, telling me that she wouldn't be calling off her wedding next week, despite everyone telling her to postpone due for health and safety reasons, and would claw my eyes out if I stayed in quarantine with my sick mum instead of coming. FML

I agree, your life sucks

2134

You deserved it

135

Tweet

Share

Whatthefuckaburger

Everyone's an expert

Empathy hurts

By Wex - 9/1/2009 09:02 - Chile

Today, I went to the UK for the first time, and had the most amazing time with my girlfriend, catching it all on tape. When I got back to South America, I realized someone had stolen my camera. FML

I agree, your life sucks

24821

You deserved it

2633

Tweet

Share

By swmmr - 7/8/2011 19:41 - United States

Today, my dad suggested that as an alternative to buying me new school clothes that actually fit, I should just join the swim team, lose some weight, and wear my stuff from last year. FML

I agree, your life sucks

26354

You deserved it

14049

Tweet

Share

By maniac11 - 11/10/2012 00:58 - United States

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house. I really had to use the bathroom, but decided to wait. After about an hour, I went to the restroom. I pissed for so long that when I walked out her family all started clapping. FML

I agree, your life sucks

31400

You deserved it

6543

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 5/9/2019 06:06

The old switcheroo

Today, I was unable to go on my dream vacation because I thought I'd lost my passport. Feeling incredibly stupid, I had no choice but to watch my plane depart without me. Shortly after, my brother handed me passport, saying that since I wasn't going on my trip, I could use my refund to pay for his cat's surgery. My trip was non-refundable. FML

I agree, your life sucks

2400

You deserved it

163

Tweet

Share

By Aiaiii - 3/6/2010 07:55 - Germany

Today, I spent some time in a sun-bed to prepare myself for a very special reunion with my boyfriend, who I haven't seen in 6 months. I hope he likes crispy red butt-cheeks, and I wonder whether they will start peeling before or after he returns. FML

I agree, your life sucks

9423

You deserved it

36634

Tweet

Share

By Jaybird1587 - 3/8/2009 12:43 - United States

Today, I was just about to get in the shower, when I heard a loud crunch. I thought to myself, boy the neighbours next door must be doing some heavy construction. Two seconds after that thought, my brother knocked on the door to inform me that the neighbours tree had just fallen on my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks

50890

You deserved it

2477

Tweet

Share

By me - 4/11/2011 04:38 - United States

Today, I sent my grandma a naked picture instead of my girlfriend. While attempting to delete it, I sent it again. FML

I agree, your life sucks

19671

You deserved it

54574

Tweet

Share

By SmellyLeg - 20/11/2017 15:00

Today, my bike slipped on ice and I slid spectacularly for several meters. While my helmet saved me from a cracked skull, nothing could protect me from landing leg-first in the dog poop somebody hadn't bothered to pick up. I had to go to school like that. FML

I agree, your life sucks

3215

You deserved it

295

Tweet

Share

By partygirlxxx - 24/5/2009 03:01 - United States

Today, for my birthday, my brother gave me some of those fake 'Harry Potter' edible cockroaches. I ate one. It wasn't fake. FML

I agree, your life sucks

59597

You deserved it

9686

Tweet

Share

By Almost Fired - 15/8/2019 12:00

Today, I got written up for insulting a customer last week, who then rang up to complain about my bad attitude. I was on vacation all last week. My boss doesn't believe me. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1796

You deserved it

110

Tweet

Share

By JuggaloSlasher15 - 8/8/2013 23:03 - United States

Today, at the pool, a kid no older than 8 was sitting on the diving board, not letting anyone else use it. I went over and tried to reason with him, but he wouldn't listen. My uncle stormed over, said "I got this!" and punted him over the edge. We both got thrown out for "bullying" the kid. FML

I agree, your life sucks

51622

You deserved it

6749

Tweet

Share

By emmmbo - 19/12/2011 15:40 - Australia

Today, my brother and I proposed to our girlfriends at the same time. We had perfect synchronization after practicing for days. My brother's girlfriend said yes, mine said no. FML

I agree, your life sucks

55681

You deserved it

5426

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 4/4/2009 14:44 - Canada

Today, I logged onto my computer to access a video from my porn stash. However, the folder was empty except for my favourite file. Thinking that a virus deleted everything, I was thankful my favourite file remained. When I opened it, I saw a video of my parents telling me not to masturbate. FML

I agree, your life sucks

104366

You deserved it

45037

Tweet

Share

By talhabilal - 11/3/2010 14:28 - Pakistan

Today, I found out that my entire family thinks I have no friends, am expressionless (to quote, "a robot") and that my monotonous voice hints at the suppressed depression hidden deep inside me. According to them, I need psychic evaluation. It all came out at a family reunion. FML

I agree, your life sucks

25677

You deserved it

3423

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 31/10/2015 00:47 - United States - Pensacola

Today, my parents searched my younger sister's phone because she had been acting suspiciously. I asked my mom if she was going to search mine too. She laughed and said, "Sweetie, your phone is probably even duller than mine!" FML

I agree, your life sucks

23719

You deserved it

2825

Tweet

Share

By Username - 28/9/2010 16:16 - France

Today, my mum suggested that I should take self-defense lessons just in case I ever get attacked. Jokingly, I said, "As long as I walk under street lamps, no one is going to touch me." She replied, "Well, you never know, they might mistake you for someone good looking." FML

I agree, your life sucks

32263

You deserved it

4823

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 27/1/2016 16:35 - United States - Overland Park

Today, at my daughter's fundraiser, I noticed that a guy with a face only a fist could love kept staring at her. I said "Beautiful, isn't she?" Before I could tell him to keep it in his damned pants, he replied "Hah. She's my girlfriend, dude. Total beast in the sack." Complete news to me on both counts. FML

I agree, your life sucks

28628

You deserved it

3298

Tweet

Share

By "willkftw" - 14/4/2019 16:00

Today, despite putting all the food in the fridge, taking all the rubbish outside, cleaning the house top to bottom and setting up bait, we're still dealing with a bloody huge ant problem. I've now got a rash all over from being bitten while I sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1847

You deserved it

143

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 30/11/2010 15:23 - United States

Today, I lied when my therapist asked why I preferred Tuesday morning appointments. It's actually because World of Warcraft is down for regularly scheduled maintenance. FML

I agree, your life sucks

12697

You deserved it

37613

Tweet

Share

By Jes - 28/6/2016 00:44

Today, my father called me to ask what my middle name is. He apparently needed to know it to remove me out from his will. FML

I agree, your life sucks

15794

You deserved it

1112

Tweet

Share

By Cody - 19/7/2010 13:59 - United States

Today, my kids surprised me when I got home. One of them played the Rocky theme song on the stereo, and the other came up to me and said, "Daddy, let's go. We need you to drop about 15 pounds before you appear in front of all of our friends at our play." FML

I agree, your life sucks

33648

You deserved it

8015

Tweet

Share

By moodyreallyrocks - 9/7/2012 00:30 - United States - Mayfield

Today, my wife is giving birth to our first born. I am an officer stationed overseas. Apparently, I am not only missing the birth, but I also missed the conception. FML

I agree, your life sucks

62703

You deserved it

2906

Tweet

Share

By WIno - 1/9/2010 02:46 - United States

Today, I have discovered things not to do while drunk. Like shaving my legs. FML

I agree, your life sucks

9263

You deserved it

40839

Tweet

Share

By Holls - 12/4/2012 13:47 - United Kingdom - Bristol

Today, I met a guy while out with some friends. He kept blowing up his cheeks, so I did it back to him and asked him why he did it. He pulled out a card from his wallet and pointed at it. It was a card saying he may have speech or facial difficulties because he had a stroke when he was 12. FML

I agree, your life sucks

27743

You deserved it

14094

Tweet

Share

By nobabies - 10/12/2017 01:30

Today, I attended my husband's holiday brunch at a company I also used to work for. I was excited to see former coworkers until one raced up, grabbed my belly, and in front of a crowded room, exclaimed, "You're pregnant!" Nope, just older and a bit fatter. FML

I agree, your life sucks

4136

You deserved it

445

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 24/7/2015 11:58 - Germany - Paderborn

Today, I asked my boyfriend to go to the airport with me, to see me off for my three-month stay abroad. He said no because the two-hour drive is "too boring". FML

I agree, your life sucks

25494

You deserved it

2521

Tweet

Share

By Dean - 15/12/2009 05:23 - United States

Today, after months of constant encouragement from my friends, I went and entered a singing contest. I sang and was booed off stage. Later on I found out my friends lied to me about my ability to sing, just so I could give them a cheap laugh. FML

I agree, your life sucks

31789

You deserved it

6556

Tweet

Share

By foreverashamed - 4/11/2011 06:57 - Canada

Today, my father decided that since I'm 21 and have never had a girlfriend, he would buy me a book on how to talk to girls. The book is written by a 9-year-old kid. FML

I agree, your life sucks

33546

You deserved it

6795

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 25/8/2015 17:44 - United Kingdom - Saint Leonards

Today, I shaved my pubes while staying at my senile grandma's place. I guess I didn't clean up properly, because she found some hair and insisted someone must have broken in while we were out and used the shower. I had to play along to spare myself embarrassment. FML

I agree, your life sucks

20456

You deserved it

7144

Tweet

Share

By nothing is sacred - 23/2/2017 12:00 - United States - Reynoldsburg

Today, I caught my mom using my toothbrush and washcloth again, despite her having both her own bathroom and supplies. I asked her to please not use mine, to which she called me an ungrateful bitch. My dad agreed. Yet they wonder why I've been desperately saving money to move out. FML

I agree, your life sucks

7411

You deserved it

480

Tweet

Share

By helen - 10/5/2011 03:44

Today, I realized that I give the computer screen a thumbs up whenever I see something cool. I work on computers in front of people all day. FML

I agree, your life sucks

15451

You deserved it

26634

Tweet

Share

By anonymous - 18/12/2010 09:11 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were playing around. He threw me over his shoulder and turned around, smacking my face against the wall. Then he smacked my head into the fridge after turning round to see "what that loud bang" was. FML

I agree, your life sucks

39283

You deserved it

4446

Tweet

Share

By MLZ - 30/7/2010 20:00 - United States

Today, while at the restaurant I work at, a bunch of kids came in. They all gave incredibly complex orders, laughed at everything I did, and made a huge mess by "spilling" hot sauce and water all over the floor. After they left, I was tipped eleven cents. FML

I agree, your life sucks

46180

You deserved it

3524

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 1/12/2015 09:49 - Australia - Corrimal

Today, I couldn't see my car in a crowded car park. I pressed unlock on my keys and saw the lights flash. As I walked over I also saw someone run from my car with an armful of my stuff. FML

I agree, your life sucks

25614

You deserved it

6562

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 12/11/2013 23:56 - United States - Westminster

Today, working as a cashier, I had a customer come through and ask to purchase a bag of ice. I asked, "Eight pound or twenty pound?", referring to the clearly marked weight of the bags. He replied, "What's the difference?" FML

I agree, your life sucks

39184

You deserved it

3252

Tweet

Share

By Calimero - 26/4/2019 02:00

Today, I forked over a hefty sum to stay the night in a beautiful, luxurious hotel room, because back home I have a baby that doesn't sleep through the night yet. Never would I have imagined I would be staying directly next to the town nightclub. I'm still awake. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1613

You deserved it

1131

Tweet

Share

By 4am blues - 13/7/2015 04:39 - United States - Lehigh Acres

Today, my cat thought it was appropriate to bring a bird into the house at 4am; the bird thought it was appropriate to attack my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks

25231

You deserved it

2519

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 7/9/2009 21:20 - United States

Today, I ran into my parents bedroom after I heard my name and what sounded like painful screams. When I opened the door my parents were on top of each other laughing hysterically. They needed me to find the key to the handcuffs. FML

I agree, your life sucks

61011

You deserved it

3419

Tweet

Share

By fuuuuck - 28/1/2010 00:27 - Canada

Today, I had a very important test. Last night, I'd had such bad leg pains that I couldn't sleep, so I took two very strong painkillers and went to sleep pain-free. I apparently accidentally overdosed, because when I woke up, I couldn't see properly or even stand up. And I missed my test. FML

I agree, your life sucks

25945

You deserved it

8672

Tweet

Share

By Anonymous - 22/4/2020 08:03

Old Man Blues

Today, I seriously strained my back picking up my daughter. I’m only 22 and now I have a bad back a man in his 70s would be proud of. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1267

You deserved it

240

Tweet

Share

Add a comment

You must be logged in to be able to post comments!

Create my account Sign in

Top comments

By Shzusuziq | 15

#7891690 - Monday 23 March 2020 14:29

I still wouldn’t go, if she can’t understand why, you don’t need her as a friend anyway!

By Cooper201288 | 16

#7891686 - Monday 23 March 2020 14:12

your friend is an asshole

COMMENTS

By Cooper201288 | 16

#7891686 - Monday 23 March 2020 14:12

your friend is an asshole

By Shzusuziq | 15

#7891690 - Monday 23 March 2020 14:29

I still wouldn’t go, if she can’t understand why, you don’t need her as a friend anyway!

By Kurliez408 | 32

#7891694 - Monday 23 March 2020 14:36

call the cops on her wedding

By chyiochan | 30

#7891706 - Monday 23 March 2020 16:02

She may not have a choice if she's renting a location/items for the wedding itself.

If shes hosting at her house, Show up in a beautiful yellow hazmat suit!

Reply

RichardPencil | 28

#7891719 - Monday 23 March 2020 16:32

Nah, you're crazy!

Obviously, a white Tyvek biohazard suit is what she should wear! Yellow?!?! Are you from the 60s? Ha!

Reply

chyiochan | 30

#7891744 - Monday 23 March 2020 20:01

I was respecting the bride being the only one who wears white!

Reply

DoctorPALO | 7

#7891999 - Tuesday 24 March 2020 18:26

Bullshit. If an event center or caterer won't work with her in the midst of the Coronavirus event, they don't deserve her business. If she's crazy enough to try and FORCE people out, screw her. The health of her family is more important than any outside events.

Reply

JuliaKay14 | 31

#7892065 - Tuesday 24 March 2020 21:50

No gatherings over a certain number people are supposed to happen, so a catering company is not at all obligated to serve her wedding

By RichardPencil | 28

#7891714 - Monday 23 March 2020 16:15

Looks like you have to go, and you'd better bring a good gift, too.

This is the downside of having friends.

By ThatOneLonelyAsian | 31

#7891739 - Monday 23 March 2020 19:18

Seems like she could have coronavirus and wants to pass it on before it kills her

By lifeis4me | 20

#7891776 - Monday 23 March 2020 21:31

Tell her to have fun alone at her wedding

By Fiona Ashe_1844920076 | 3

#7891778 - Monday 23 March 2020 21:51

inform the authorities for safety reasons.

By TomeDr | 21

#7891805 - Tuesday 24 March 2020 0:41

I would call her a “friend“, especially since your mother is sick.

By Suzi_d16 | 26

#7891811 - Tuesday 24 March 2020 1:29

Joke’s on her. Lockdown from tonight and all weddings cancelled. I bet she wishes she had wedding insurance now.