Intimacy: Bovine - FML

Bovine

By harambae - 11/09/2016 17:10 - United States - La Grange

Spicy

Today, I accidentally mooed during sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 228

You deserved it 3 181

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

By Bug5992 - 09/12/2012 22:46 - United States - Kent

Spicy

Today, I was getting intimate with my current bootycall when he thought it would be funny to make animal sounds. He "baa-ed" "moo-ed" and "gobbled" until losing his erection from intense laughter, leaving me there very confused and unsatisfied. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 861

You deserved it 10 318

By Anonymous - 20/06/2009 11:13 - Switzerland

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with a girl. Things were getting pretty hot, so I decided to smack her butt. I missed. I smacked my balls instead. Real hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 801

You deserved it 97 655

Honky

By Anonymous - 05/08/2015 14:06 - United States

Spicy

Today, while my boyfriend and I were getting intimate, I let out a moan that can only really be described as sounding like a clown car horn. He ended up laughing so hard that he couldn't continue. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 024

You deserved it 5 032

SORRY!

By imsorry - 14/01/2015 23:57 - United States - Oakland

Spicy

Today, I found out how whipped I am when, at the climax of sex, I moaned, "I'm sorry!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 181

You deserved it 7 812

By Anonymous - 28/05/2017 20:00

Today, my boyfriend and I were finally alone and things were starting to get intimate. I was on top of him trying to be sexy, when in my excitement I giggled and called him a "silly girl" by accident. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 856

You deserved it 1 776

Barf

By Danielle - 25/10/2020 11:02

Spicy

Today, I threw up during sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 190

You deserved it 188

By KO - 12/10/2014 16:45 - United States

Spicy

Today, in the middle of sex, my husband accidentally headbutted me, almost knocking me unconscious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 829

You deserved it 4 378

Turn of phrase

By MiniJeans - 30/04/2015 02:25 - United States - Casselberry

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend for the first time. I moved my leg to wrap it around him and accidentally hit his penis. Without thinking, I said, "Sorry little guy!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 301

You deserved it 12 293

By Anonymous - 14/12/2018 14:00

Spicy

Today, after weeks of no sex, my boyfriend finally decided to have sex with me. While we were getting into it I accidentally farted in his face while his mouth was open. No more sex for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 656

You deserved it 2 130

By eeh - 07/05/2009 14:45 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. I really get off on hearing her say my name so I was imagining her doing so more often than she actually was. I then called out my own name by accident. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 638

You deserved it 103 433

Next

Top comments

bigbagofnope 25

Saturday 1 October 2016 3:01

did your partner give you any beef about it?

emeraldarcher74 30

Saturday 1 October 2016 3:02

There was an FML like this a while back. In it, a dude was having sex with an overweight girl when she blurted out "milk me like a cow. " Also, I hope you didn't kill the MOOd.

Comments

MitchRapp 20

Saturday 1 October 2016 6:58

Now very Cow-collated

notjordansime 12

Saturday 1 October 2016 7:27

At least you didn't moo like a family guy European cow... SHAZOOOOOOOO!!!!

Ruskiy_Cherep 18

Saturday 1 October 2016 7:50

Ha-ha, that may be the funniest thing ive ever heard anyone do during sex

MulticoloredSlug 18

Saturday 1 October 2016 8:27

How do you accidentally moo

Baron_Kaz 15

Saturday 1 October 2016 8:54

How do you "moo" during sex... What really was going on in your mind when you inadvertently made cow noises during copulation??!!

InnocenceBlue 37

Saturday 1 October 2016 9:36

How does one "accidentally" moo exactly?

r1has 28

Saturday 1 October 2016 10:23

It's okay. If a little moo kills the mooed, then that person needs to move away from you. A moo is such a silly thing to crow about

species4872 19

Saturday 1 October 2016 19:49

So your boyfriends a cowpoke?

TheGamerXYZ 19

Saturday 1 October 2016 19:56

That is utterly hilarious.

verysmarmy 11

Saturday 1 October 2016 23:01

Illinois.

Keywords

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The Top

Today, my husband and I were role playing to keep our marriage alive. His character was a deranged stalker while I was the helpless girl. My neighbor thought I was really being chased so she called the cops. Once they came we explained the whole story and got a fine for disturbing the peace. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 849

You deserved it 7 890

Today, I realized that whenever I use emoticons, I tend to make the same face in real life. My coworkers gleefully showed me various pictures with my tongue out, face scrunched up, and so on, while staring at my phone. They've already made their way around the office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 006

You deserved it 21 832

The Top

Today, I was debating weed legalization in drug awareness. I was thoroughly unleashing arguments: how marijuana turns normal citizens into criminals, how the government spends billions to enforce drug laws, when I lost my train of thought. My teacher grinned saying, "My point exactly." FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 137

You deserved it 49 778

Today, I told my girlfriend over MSN that we had to talk. I log on to facebook and the first thing I see is that she changed our relationship from "In a Relationship" to "It's Complicated." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 634

You deserved it 11 469

Today, my neighbour casually mentioned that he sold my car's GPS that I'd let him borrow. He figured I wouldn't be needing it anymore since I lost my license. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 398

You deserved it 5 531

Today, after being told two weeks ago that my contract would be renewed, my boss managed to tell me that actually he had other applicants for the job. I will be let go, but he offered me two months extra so I could finish the projects he had me working on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 848

You deserved it 738

Today, I returned to work after a restful week-long holiday. Before I left, I'd finished a huge assignment which is due this week. I walk in to find a water pipe has burst just above my desk, flooding our office with water and ruining my computer. Happy New Year to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 983

You deserved it 2 616

Today, I was dressing in front of my boyfriend. He was looking at me in wonder and I assumed this was a good thing. Then he muttered, "God damn, you're awkwardly shaped." FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 019

You deserved it 3 871