Today, my step-mom stole over $100 in cash from me, dumped dirty cat litter all over my clean bed sheets, and called me a whore for having a polite conversation with my boyfriend. I confronted my father about it. He told me to forgive her, because she's "on her period." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my mom cleaned out my bank account, saying my "no-good dad" owes her child support and that she'll get it one way or another. FML
Today, my boyfriend's mom is talking shit about me to anyone who will listen, all because I refused to stay at her house and help her with a few chores she said she would pay me for. She keeps leaving out the part where I saw dozens of bed bugs not even 5 minutes after I got there. FML
Today, I discovered that the reason my mom hasn't been noticing the extra cleaning I've done lately is because her boyfriend took credit when she asked about it; and was rewarded for it in bed. I helped him get with my mom. FML
Today, I caught my mom using my toothbrush and washcloth again, despite her having both her own bathroom and supplies. I asked her to please not use mine, to which she called me an ungrateful bitch. My dad agreed. Yet they wonder why I've been desperately saving money to move out. FML
Today, I was talking to my mom about my issues with my girlfriend. While she was sympathizing, she slowly picked up my wallet, took $100 and left. FML
Today, I invited my deadbeat dad over for dinner, hoping we could resolve our issues and build a proper relationship. Just minutes after he arrived, I caught him stealing money from my purse. He actually said I owe him for raising me. He ditched my mom and me when I was 5. FML
Today, I found out that my mom bet my dad $100 that she could pay my boyfriend ten bucks to break up with me. She is now $90 richer. FML
Today, I caught my dad stealing my money again, after I'd warned him he was on his last chance. I threw him out, since he’s been sleeping rough on my sofa. He reported me to the authorities for "elder abuse" and showed them fresh bruises I know the conniving old bastard gave himself. I was handcuffed. FML
Today, my mother screamed at me because she thinks I peed on the toilet seat. Not my dad, me. I’m a girl. FML
Today, my dad threatened to kick me out and cut me off if I didn't apologize to his girlfriend, whom I don't get along with. She found the heavily used textbook I bought from a second hand bookstore, which is full of funny doodles and tons of harsh hate messages to a certain "Susan", which coincidentally is her name. FML
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Top comments
howdeedoo 22
Blow up her car and say "I'm on my period"
pvtmeives 4
Quick Cinderella run before the evil stepmom makes you her slave
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Comments (113)
martialeng 1
Id go to her room and nail myself in and if they try to complain that they need to get to sleep Id say "Oh I'm sorry but I'm taking your bed....someone dumped shit all over my bed!"
Kitten_Calderon 14
Not all women are terrible on their periods. Heck I know this one girl who, when on hers, you wouldn't even know unless she told you. She's still sweet and pleasant and tells me all the time she hates when girls use the period excuse to be mean.. Your mom should attempt to relax. I hope she does
Hammer01 8
Go pee on bed.
rubsin 15
Yes do it
chrissylovesyou 7
At least now you have an excuse to be a bitch to her while you're on it xD
Cilleemaan 4
How a woman acts "on her period" is how she acts. It isn't as if she'd had some external tragedy happen, how she acts on her period is a part of her character. Fortunately for you, you'll grow up and leave home in a few years. Your dad married her. Your dad is stuck. I guess he is bent on going from one bitchy looser to the next. If he ever leaves her, try to get your dad into "cognitive therapy" so he doesn't spend the rest of his life like this.
CallMeCasey 6
she needs midol
Beva_fml 15
Are there any clean cat litter?
BeefyMeaty 8
Just imagine when she hits menopause!.. Haha
valigzz 4
Stepmoms are ******* bitches