Today, we had bingo. Three rounds into it a group behind me started to yell, "BINGO, BINGO!" I looked around and saw no one was coming to verify that they had a bingo, so I turned around and said "Stand up." The girl was a dwarf, and she was standing up. FML
Collection
College Life
Packed lecture halls, a sketchy roommate and frat parties: welcome to college, the real thing.
Today, I was playing at a bingo hall, when I got a bingo for $50. I got so excited that I accidentally yelled, "Holy fuck!" They kicked me out. I didn't get the money. FML
Today, my social anxiety hit a new low. I was playing bingo and, although I won, I didn't shout "bingo" because I thought too many people would look at me. FML
Today, I was cashier at work. The line came to a stop, but there was still people there. I kept saying next, but no one moved. I finally looked over the counter where there was a lady who had been standing there the whole time. She was a midget. FML
Today, I went to a bingo club with my gran and won the second game and a butthurt old lady accused me of cheating. I ended up being taken aside by an apologetic member of staff and asked to leave. I'm still trying to figure out how you can even cheat at bingo. FML
Today, I was volunteering at a nursing home calling bingo numbers. One woman stood up and started making noises, so I assumed she had won and started clapping. She then fell on the floor and died of a heart attack. I essentially applauded her death. FML
Today, my friends and I go to a bar and get wasted. I walk around and see a kid. I start yelling, "There's a child in this bar! There's a CHILD in this BAR!" She turns around. She was a midget. FML
Today, I was visiting my grandmother at her retirement community. Bingo is really popular there and she loves it, so I went thinking it would be a fun activity for us. I won the jackpot and my car got keyed by a group of angry old people. FML
Today, I finally won at bingo after playing every Thursday night for months. It was a $750 bingo. I split with 85 other winners. My share was $8. FML
Today, the girl I like at work surprised me in the otherwise empty break room. She caught me taking part in what might as well have been the Ball-Scratching Olympics. I didn't notice she was behind me until she cleared her throat to get my attention. Shit. FML
Today, I was at the cinema. There was a really tall woman in front of me and whenever I leaned to the right or left she would lean to the same side I do. Later, she started laughing. They guy next to her was telling her where I moved. FML
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Top comments
f_alltheirlives 3
Did she use her big girl voice?
screwtaylor 0
She's not a midget! She's fun sized.
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Comments (86)
beany212 0
Little person. But munchkin works too, Dorothy.
waterynuggets 0
Your life isn't ******, it was just a..small mistake.
redbluegreen 41
Hehehe.
pinkpoproxx 0
At DMS, playing bingo is a euphemism for sex ^_^.
crazeh_monkeh 0
waitwaitwait... You're telling me that this FML wasn't about having sex with a dwarf? Great. Now I have to go find some good dwarf ****.
posampo 0
trust me it exists, and its so funny
orlandogirl4life 11
lmao. oh well. honest mistake. im sure she wasnt too fazed
plexico 4
I thought the right term depended on whether you were talking about a Hobbit or an Oompa-Loompa.
bloodyhell9398 0
who plays bingo??
allmidnighteyes 11
midgets play bingo
allmidnighteyes 11
They gamble out in Reno
CyclonePsycho 1
Is that a song? If not, it should be. Those replies just flow too well with each other. D:
allmidnighteyes 11
Where a man plays a piano
allmidnighteyes 11
rofl. ...in the middle of the Alamo
allmidnighteyes 11
That makes me want to turn comments from FML into shitty indie music The hipsters would eat it up with their 20 word coffee orders and mobile blogging.
william0090 0
to start off, that rhyming thing was gay. to finish, whoever the two before me are obviously don't know anything about music.
allmidnighteyes 11
59 can suck 37 dicks. in a row.
haleypiejune20 4
Y'all need to get together and write a song! That was pretty cool!
wingedspiritus 0
How is your life effed up in any way? -___- Ugh. Couldn't you have cared to put a bit more attention?
prshusl0l 0
aww mann, FYL
SHTFCKINGHAPPENS 0
umm the proper term is "little person" LOL
pepper2394 0
You should have picked her up and screamed she has a bingo! That would get their attention.