Miscellaneous: Today, my friends and I go to a bar and get wasted. I walk around...

By frenchy - 06/02/2009 00:55 - United States

Today, my friends and I go to a bar and get wasted. I walk around and see a kid. I start yelling, "There's a child in this bar! There's a CHILD in this BAR!" She turns around. She was a midget. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 125

You deserved it 55 452

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Same thing different taste

By jules - 17/04/2009 17:05 - United States

Today, I was in the supermarket when I saw a little boy trying to reach for something on the top shelf. I went over to him and asked if his mom knew where he was. The boy turned around. He was actually a very angry midget. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 579

You deserved it 57 170

By insomnitude - 05/03/2011 06:55 - United States

Today, I got mugged by a midget. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 774

You deserved it 13 804

By Anonymous - 06/02/2011 17:53 - United States

Today, while waiting on a customer at a restaurant, I accidentally asked a midget if she'd like a children's menu. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 757

You deserved it 30 577

By Anonymous - 08/02/2017 19:00 - Ireland - Navan

Today, at work, I bumped into what looked like a small child and said, "Sorry, little man". Turns out he actually was a little person. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 240

You deserved it 1 155

By mybad - 11/09/2014 03:57 - United States

Today, at work, a midget came in to buy beer. Not only was he almost as tall as me, he got offended when I had to card him and explain that the manager told me to card everyone, and that it wasn't because he was short. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 406

You deserved it 3 279

By DrunkParents - 31/03/2015 23:32 - United States - Billings

Today, a really drunk couple staggered into the store I work at. One of them yelled at me, "Hey you! Kid! Tell us where the booze is at!" This would have been funny if these people weren't my parents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 847

You deserved it 2 728

Gratitude

By srsly_what - 28/04/2011 23:13 - United Kingdom

Today, a little girl wandered into the glass-cleaning area of the pub I work at. It's a dangerous place for a little kid, so I took her hand and asked where her mum was. The kid starts screaming and the mother appears in the doorway shouting "GET AWAY FROM MY BABY!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 950

You deserved it 3 536

By Redhead4life - 18/03/2012 00:48 - United States - Miami

Today, a little girl looked at me and yelled "Mommy look, there's a real leprechaun!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 883

You deserved it 2 885

By saraleerocha - 02/11/2010 06:20 - France

Today, I was cashier at work. The line came to a stop, but there was still people there. I kept saying next, but no one moved. I finally looked over the counter where there was a lady who had been standing there the whole time. She was a midget. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 876

You deserved it 14 319

By fourfootnine - 07/03/2011 13:47 - United States

Today, I discovered that I'm short enough to be legally considered a midget. My daughter now wants to bring me to school for show and tell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 724

You deserved it 4 389

dirty_hoes 0

Friday 6 February 2009 19:31

being under 5 ft myself, this sorta things happens to me. it's worse for the little person than for you, get over yourself.

sillyfox 0

Friday 27 November 2009 13:18

Idiot

Comments

dirty_hoes 0

Friday 6 February 2009 19:31

being under 5 ft myself, this sorta things happens to me. it's worse for the little person than for you, get over yourself.

quiksta 0

Saturday 14 February 2009 12:59

i would say the term "little person" is just as, if not more offensive than "midget". The correct nomenclature is "dwarf" assholes.

egaonogenki 0

Tuesday 3 March 2009 10:52

I'm 6'0", but knew a 14-year-old who was about 6'7" (or was it 6'5"?) I would take that as a compliment as I'd want to look younger. (But it's best if they say, "There's a high schooler in this bar!") On the other hand, if a bar bouncer starts not to check my ID, then that's a passive insult to how old I look.

haseenasays 0

Thursday 19 March 2009 2:31

#13 That is toooottally something i would have done if i WASNT drunk... and i would still do it if i even knew it was a little person ahhah

sillyfox 0

Friday 27 November 2009 13:18

Idiot

RenoTheRhino 30

Monday 11 November 2013 3:10

Dick.

Shownis182 0

Thursday 19 March 2009 15:00

Haha this is funny, the same thing happened to me in a bar, except for I was extra drunk and a little person like ran across the front of me and I went "AHHHHHH", I dont why , but I think its funny . haha .

fymother 13

Friday 27 April 2012 4:45

"Someone get these motherfucking children out of this motherfucking bar!"

Dalarsco 0

Tuesday 31 March 2009 6:27

I know a chick who is 4'10" and could totally kick you ass. She's a hockey player.

nazooer 11

Friday 17 April 2009 8:03

RETARD

freber120 0

Monday 25 May 2009 7:27

At least you were looking out for the "kid"... with a crappy turnout

girlnamedkris 0

Sunday 7 June 2009 7:25

Oh for the love of god! USING THE WORD 'PROCEEDED' DOES NOT MAKE YOU SOUND SMARTER OR MAKE THIS FUNNIER. Freaking everyone uses it in their FML's for some dumb reason, but what's worse is that it is used inappropriately. Learn English. It may have been funny once, but as with all things funny, it doesn't become more humorous with repetition. You're beating a dead horse here. Jesus.

Sushimomo 0

Wednesday 6 October 2010 20:06

Isn't the defanition of proceeded to go from one thing to another? If so, it's right. The first event was going to the bar then they proceeded to get waisted. One event to the next.

stonessm 2

Saturday 10 November 2012 23:55

*Wasted* *definition* I find it truly humorous when people try to correct someone else's grammar and end up failing worse than the person they were correcting