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Come on, man

By Anonymous - 06/03/2026 00:00

Today, my parents said that we're never going to see our grandparents again because my grandpa hit my asshole little brother with a belt for calling him a boomer. I love my grandparents so much but my parents won't listen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 309

You deserved it 259

Hangry

By Anonymous - 18/03/2026 12:00

Today, I realized that my diet has gone completely bust. If I try to limit the amount of food that I eat, my stomach is growling and keeping me up at night, when my sugar isn't crashing and turning me into a food vacuum cleaner eating everything in sight. I'm not starving myself, I'm trying to control my portions. FML

I agree, your life sucks 333

You deserved it 94

Slam dunk

By Yuk - 29/06/2026 22:00 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I was pissing in a bathroom and I tossed my empty energy drink can into the toilet for laughs. The unnecessarily powerful flush sucked it up where it got stuck and caused me to get sprayed with toilet water while I frantically tried to open the stall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30

You deserved it 1 233

Family man

By Anonymous - 24/08/2026 00:00 - United States - Louisville

Today, I found out that yet again I'm having twins. Sounds great and all, but the only problem is that my mother-in-law is the one pregnant. Oh boy, I'm fucked! FML

I agree, your life sucks 66

You deserved it 771

Freeloader

By Anonymous - 23/10/2025 22:00

Today, my boyfriend said he OD’d twice because of me, got sober because of me, and is done “trying.” I bought him a car yesterday and he hasn’t paid rent or bills in almost two years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 147

You deserved it 516

Grandma knows best

By Anonymous - 08/11/2025 20:00

Today, I’m beyond pissed off and downright repulsed that my daughter is still in her stupid rebellious phase. it's bad enough that she does shit herself but now she’s involving our grandchildren. She showed up to our annual gathering and my 10 year-old granddaughter had bright purple dyed hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 137

You deserved it 887

Twitter (currently X)

By MF - 21/12/2025 12:00

Today, because now Twitter shows the "For you" section automatically, the first thing I saw was some guy saying childless women are useless and pathetic. I wanted kids but had a hysterectomy because I was developing cancer. Seeing that brought back the pain and made me feel like crap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 528

You deserved it 116

Billie Jean

By Anonymous - 28/11/2025 15:00

Today, despite my warnings, my mother continues to go see my ex's son and encourage her to get more child support from me. They both say that because I signed the birth certificate, that makes that baby mine. I don't think he is, and I'm currently with someone else, with my first real son on the way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 153

You deserved it 625

Happy New Year!

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2021 but it's good stuff

Today, my New Year’s Eve consisted of four things: being home alone, drinking cheap alcohol out of a tooth mug, getting an upset stomach from that, then going to bed early with ear plugs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 951

You deserved it 368

Short fuse

By Anonymous - 03/01/2026 00:00

Today, two days after losing my temper with my smart mouthed 7 year-old son and slapping him across the face, I tried to apologize by buying him a treat and telling him if anyone found out, I would get in trouble. Today, I got a call from social services about the "bruise" on his face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 91

You deserved it 1 234

Hand it over

By Anonymous - 23/04/2026 15:00 - United States - Maryland Heights

Today, my girlfriend totally emasculated me and made me a laughing stock when we got mugged and, instead of just handing over her purse like the guy said, she took out a stun gun and used it on him while I freaked out and cried. Now all my friends are laughing at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 133

You deserved it 823

Dad jokes, part #23555

By Lizzie - This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom - Birmingham

Today, my boyfriend came over for dinner for the first time. As a joke, my dad answered the door wearing the white church robes that he wears when he is lay-reading during a church service, and said, "Welcome, child of God." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 920

You deserved it 359

Bitter

By Oshi - 02/05/2026 15:00 - United States - Miami

Today, I got a Venmo request from a guy who I friendzoned when I announced my relationship with another guy on Instagram. He’s backcharging me for all the dinners, auto repair bills, etc., he apparently spent on me. It’s over $4000. I don’t have that kind of money and he’s threatening legal action if I don’t pay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 316

You deserved it 545

Let the man have his hobbies

By hildi - 07/06/2026 09:00 - Switzerland

Today, my husband is such a cheap-ass that he spent two days underneath his old beater car with an angle grinder and a welding rig, grinding off some old rusty supports, and welding on new ones. He makes enough money to throw that thing in the scrapyard and buy a brand new car. I don't get it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 98

You deserved it 534

Zero to a hundred real fast

By Ron - 09/02/2026 12:00

Today, I asked the girl I’m seeing to make me some chicken soup because I was sick. She replied, “If you’re sick, go to the doctor. I’m not doing wifey shit if you’re not gonna make me a wife, let alone a girlfriend.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 132

You deserved it 1 039

Breaking mom

By Fuck motherhood - 01/03/2026 03:00

Today, I'm so sick of being a mom. I have a screaming toddler and a squalling infant, tearing up the house and stinking up every room, and my husband still has the balls to not only be happy, but ask for ANOTHER. I'm about to walk, dump the kids with his smiley ass, and take his rich family's money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 204

You deserved it 686

Link please!

By barbecued goat anyone? - 05/04/2026 20:00 - United States

Today, I borrowed a goat from a coworker to clear out an overgrown section of our yard. It worked great, except for the part where the goat butted me on my ass. Of course my wife was filming and laughing, and later put it on Instagram. FML

I agree, your life sucks 172

You deserved it 320

I can't get behind that

By Anonymous - 20/05/2026 12:00 - United States

Today, my whole family turned on me because I absolutely refused to attend my son's wedding, even though he really wanted me to walk him down the aisle. He married the woman he cheated on his ex-wife with, and abandoned their kids. That's why I refused to attend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 574

You deserved it 85

They're all out to get me

By Anonymous - 21/06/2026 12:00 - United States - Rialto

Today, we drove for four days across states. My dad refused to let us go into the amusement park or check into the hotel we'd traveled for. The park is now cashless and he swears that it’s a government conspiracy to monitor and control us. He made us sleep in the car before going home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 452

You deserved it 69

Clean break

By Bad thing? - 09/09/2026 15:00 - United States

Today, my not-yet-even girlfriend dumped me in front of her family, as they all mocked and laughed at me because of my pointless and ridiculous "quirks". I'd told them that I shower and change into fresh clothes every day. I'd also said do not wipe after I poop, but I wash, soap, rinse, and dry. FML

I agree, your life sucks 130

You deserved it 378

Suspicious activity

By Anonymous - 26/09/2025 22:00

Today, a guy cut me off on the freeway, so I followed him, intent on confronting him. He turned off and went down a side road… right to the gate of a government base, which opened. I did a U-turn and hauled ass, only to get stopped by cops and grilled relentlessly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 97

You deserved it 812

Broke boy

By Anonymous - 19/10/2025 00:00

Today, the cashier asked if I wanted to donate $1 to help hungry children. I said, “Not today, thank you.” The man behind me loudly said, “Wow…” Now everyone thinks I hate children. I'm just that broke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 514

You deserved it 80

Single dad struggles

By Just kids being kids - 02/12/2025 12:00

Today, I lost yet another girlfriend because of my kids’ behavior. The last one told me, “I’d rather get fisted by Freddy Krueger than deal with those hellspawn of yours!” At this point, I’m going to be a single dad forever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 113

You deserved it 697

The more you know

By My mouth tastes like blood - 14/12/2025 22:00

Today, I was able to get dental care for the first time in 4 years. I had been going through all the hygiene motions, but without professional input all that time, no one was there to warn me about the sour candies I had been eating, and how they ruined your teeth anyway. My teeth are well beyond salvageable now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 157

You deserved it 406

Red flag

By FML - 14/02/2026 22:00

Today, I'm getting married in a week. I was sashaying around the kitchen talking to my friend on the phone, saying, "No more diets, no more blowjobs, and if he complains I get half his money!" when I turned and saw my fiancé in the door. He won't believe that it was a joke and now wants a prenup. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71

You deserved it 1 141

Proud mama

By Anonymous - 02/05/2026 20:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my darling first born 23 year-old son just called me, a single mum who works full time, disgusting because I’ve gained weight and been too busy to go to the gym. He’s living at home and not paying rent, despite working. FML

I agree, your life sucks 468

You deserved it 128

The Times They Are A-Changin'

By Anonymous - 16/09/2026 20:00 - United States - Pasadena

Today, I thought of this website for the first time in like 15 years. I wanted to laugh but now people just post actual sad shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 255

You deserved it 138

Unrequited

By Cannneverwinsmh - 30/09/2025 15:00

Today, I once again listened as the girl I've loved for the past three years ranted about how she’s gonna be single forever and give up on dating. She asked, “Isn’t there one guy out there, just ONE GUY who will love me and cherish me?” When I brought up that I, once again, would love to do so, she rejected me; AGAIN. FML

I agree, your life sucks 216

You deserved it 615

Tasty treat

By Anonymous - 09/10/2025 12:00

Today, I discovered that the delicious beef jerky strips I’ve been eating all week are actually the dog’s teeth cleaning chews. FML

I agree, your life sucks 139

You deserved it 461

Breathtaking view

By Anonymous - 04/11/2025 00:00

Today, my husband farted while he was naked and bending over to pick up his clothes, so me lying on the bed got a perfect view of his butthole twitching and flapping around as the gas escaped. Who says romance is dead? FML

I agree, your life sucks 419

You deserved it 139

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The Top

Today, this girl and I were chilling in my apartment. Things got heated up and we started making out. One thing lead to another, and the next thing I knew, she was giving me head. I was getting ready to bust when she stopped, looked up into my eyes and said, "Do you believe in Jesus?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 224 312

You deserved it 35 846

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend whilst straddled on top of him. He started to undo my bra. I was fine with this but he stopped kissing me and looked at me with a slight smile. He then said, "I know this is going to kill the mood... but I feel like I could milk your boobs right now" FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 629

You deserved it 1 565

Random

Today, we had a school reunion. The guy who bullied me throughout my high school career is now rich and married. I'm broke and single, and he specifically came up to me to point it out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 093

You deserved it 2 248

Today, after I sent around 300 entries to a competition hosted by a deodorant company where the main prize is a trip to Hawaii, spending around 5 hours sending the entries, I won a deodorant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 450

You deserved it 37 005

Today, I went to Walgreen's for a tub of Vaseline. The old guy at the counter looked at me, winked, and said, "Not having too much luck with the ladies, eh?" He was right. FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 096

You deserved it 13 989

Today, I'm lying in a hospital bed with two broken leg bones, a reattached tendon, and four screws holding my leg together. Why? Because I wanted chocolate milk and some asshat didn't see me walking across the road. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 995

You deserved it 541

Today, to add to the pointlessness of my existence, not only have I been rejected from the Army, the Air Force, and the Navy, I received a rejection notice from the Army Reserves. FML

I agree, your life sucks 839

You deserved it 243

Today, after a week wondering why my bedroom smelled faintly like oranges, I cleaned the sheets, washed the curtains, checked the trash, and even moved the furniture, I found the source: one orange I'd put in the pocket of a winter coat months ago. It was so gross, I had to toss the coat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 126

You deserved it 290