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Name that tune!

By Anonymous - 06/09/2025 15:00 - United States - Toledo

Today, I signed up for karaoke at a bar, thinking I’d picked a fun, easy song. When it started playing, I realized I'd unknowingly chosen the eight-minute extended remix with two full guitar solos. I had to awkwardly sway on stage for five minutes while everyone drank their beers silently. FML

I agree, your life sucks 141

You deserved it 358

What?

By Candlestick Maker - 07/03/2024 05:00 - United States

Today, I went to a doctor's appointment to figure out why I've suddenly started going deaf. As it turns out, for some reason my ears now produce wax at an alarmingly fast rate. "Enough to make an entire candle before long if you save it up," the doctor said when she cleared them out. I guess this is my life now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 487

You deserved it 86

EXPLAIN YOURSELF

By Anonymous - 11/09/2025 03:00

Today, I was summoned by the big boss and I was bricking myself waiting in his waiting room, wondering what job he wanted me to do, or if I’m getting fired. Turns out he heard I watch a lot of anime and wanted me to teach him about it so he can talk to his teenage daughter about her interests. FML

I agree, your life sucks 323

You deserved it 82

Awkward conversation ahead

By Anonymous - 12/03/2024 16:00 - United States

Today, as a tax preparer, I had to deliver the bad news that a lady owed a very large sum in taxes. I even had my supervisor check my work as this was serious. Apparently she has been claiming exemptions she doesn't qualify for for years by going to another local tax office that closed down last year, due to fraud. FML

I agree, your life sucks 537

You deserved it 80

Today I learned…

By Anonymous - 15/03/2024 00:00 - United States

Today, I found out that the little bumps on the child seats in the Wal-Mart shopping carts are spaced just enough that they can crack my brand new phone's screen past its screen protector in two places. FML

I agree, your life sucks 322

You deserved it 212

No pain, no sleep

By Anonymous - 29/09/2025 09:00

Today, after going to the bathroom I went to bed. I have a very sturdy bookshelf that sticks halfway to the right of the door as I enter my bedroom. I had dumbly turned off the lights as I didn't want to bother with them before bed. I ended up kneeing the bookshelf, hard, now I'm wide awake and in pain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 163

You deserved it 263

Impatience

By Anonymous - 15/05/2020 02:00

Today, my dad asked me to help him buy a laptop by searching online. He explicitly said, "When you have time." I decided to shower as I had just woken up. While showering, I was startled by loud banging and my dad angrily asking why I wasn't looking for his laptop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 769

You deserved it 151

Kitchen nightmares

By Clumsy - 24/08/2021 11:01 - Brazil - Niterói

Today, I accepted I can't cook at all. Why? I burned myself cooking popcorn in a microwave oven. I accidentally burst the package open and a scorching kernel flew into my bra. FML

I agree, your life sucks 778

You deserved it 206

Dungeons and dragons

By Anonymous - 23/11/2022 06:00 - Germany

Today, I had terrible nightmares and woke up several times because of them, as well as my roommates having a pen and paper session downstairs. I had to get up at 6:30 a.m. and sit through a whole day of team training at work, barely staying awake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 641

You deserved it 128

Technology hates human

By I HATE THESE MACHINE - 12/10/2025 22:00

Today, I went through a self-checkout at a grocery store. The machine kept repeating, “Please remove the unexpected item in the bagging area.” After five attempts, an employee came over and discovered the “unexpected item” was my own elbow resting on the counter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 116

You deserved it 400

You took your time!

By Rejected - 01/09/2021 10:01

Today, almost 7 weeks after the second interview for a job I really wanted, and hearing nothing from the job or the staffing agents, I got an email saying they won’t be hiring me. I gave up my search a few weeks ago when I started the third trimester of my pregnancy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 770

You deserved it 229

I told you so

By Anonymous - 07/04/2024 23:00 - United States

Today, my dad sent me back and forth repeatedly to the auto parts store for a replacement headlight bulb. He kept insisting that what I brought back was the wrong bulb. I had to drag him there to show I was getting the right one by asking the clerk. He's wrong, but is mad at me for embarrassing him in front of the staff. FML

I agree, your life sucks 523

You deserved it 89

Unfair!

By sean - 09/04/2024 21:00 - United States

Today, I got a warning at work for wearing my ear studs. Not only have I worn them the whole time for the last year I was here, I was unaware of this “rule.” I also was just told that the female employees are allowed to wear them, but men are not. “It looks unprofessional.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 530

You deserved it 155

The sweet smell of…

By Anonymous - 14/04/2024 11:00 - United States - San Diego

Today, my coworker and I greeted each other with fist-bumps as usual. He said, "Damn bro, someone got some pussy last night." I asked what he was talking about and he stated my hands smelled "fishy". This morning I threw out some fish in my fridge and even the strongest degreaser doesn't complete the job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 448

You deserved it 146

Brat

By Anonymous - 25/10/2025 03:00

Today, my bratty stepdaughter ruins every picture possible by flipping off the camera. She either does it outright or slyly to the side. We recently paid hundreds of dollars for a professional family photoshoot and had to pay extra to Photoshop out her finger. He won’t discipline her at all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 346

You deserved it 138

Fixer upper

By failure - 29/10/2025 15:00

Today, my successful, attractive daughter gave me the "Daddy I can fix him" speech about her boyfriend. He brings in no money, exclusively wears old ratty T-shirts and sweats, and always stinks of BO and cheap beer. I have failed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 467

You deserved it 91

Carpe Diem

By Anonymous - 01/11/2025 12:00

Today, at the Y, someone told me I had a cute ass. I liked that until I realized: a) a woman said it; b) I'm a woman; c) I'm straight; d) it's my first compliment in 2 years even though I'm 25; and e) I'm so in need of positive attention I ran after this woman to ask for a date. Me desperate much? FML

I agree, your life sucks 293

You deserved it 274

Kinky

By Anonymous - 29/04/2024 13:00 - United States

Today, I was asked to pick up something from my parents' house, only to be greeted with the horrid surprise that my elderly dad has taken to wearing women's pantyhose and garters. He claims it's for his knees, but that doesn't explain the boner I had to see peeking out of his panties. FML

I agree, your life sucks 506

You deserved it 131

Escape goat

By Anonymous - 12/12/2022 16:00 - United States - Helena

Today, I found out that several coworkers had been complaining about me behind my back for a couple of weeks, including to my manager. When my manager finally brought the issue up to me, he realized that I hadn’t done anything wrong; there was an error in our computer system. Nobody has apologized. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 314

You deserved it 131

It's complicated

By Anonymous - 01/05/2024 10:00 - United States - Lenoir

Today, I found out that my ex-boyfriend, whom I'd been in love with since I was 19, wants to be back with his baby momma. His dad, after finding out that he has cancer, offered to marry me and adopt my kids to collect his SSI checks in case he dies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 445

You deserved it 144

Lovely

By Zorro - 14/11/2025 20:00

Today, I told my mom I was feeling depressed and needed motivation. She hugged me and said, “Honey, you just need to get out there and find someone who loves you for who you are.” Then she added, “...but maybe lose the mustache first.” I’m her daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 329

You deserved it 136

And then it hit me

By Anonymous - 06/05/2024 01:00 - Russia - Moscow

Today, there's a company I want to get a job at, and I've worked for a long time to get in. However, I realized that in the test task I'd been doing for almost a month, there was a small mistake in my calculations that makes all my results false. And, of course, I'd already sent this task to HR two days ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 417

You deserved it 171

DST FML

By Anonymous - 06/10/2021 08:00

Today, my partner and I spent the last 3 days transitioning our 19 month-olds bedtime by 15 minutes each day for daylight savings, only to find out we've been going the wrong way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 369

You deserved it 1 306

Rehab blues

By Anonymous - 30/11/2025 15:00

Today, a week after my girlfriend of 6 years checked herself into a rehab program 5 hours away, she called me and said I was too much of a toxic enabler and not good for her mental health, so she ended it and I have to move out before she gets home. I was going to propose when she came home. I’m completely broken. FML

I agree, your life sucks 412

You deserved it 131

Bollards!

By Anonymous - 20/05/2024 16:00 - United States - Indianapolis

Today, I proudly drove my new car to work, feeling on top of the world. As I parked, I noticed everyone in the lot staring at me. I smiled and waved, thinking they were admiring my car. It wasn't until I got to my desk that my boss informed me I'd dragged an orange traffic cone under my car the entire way to the office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 151

You deserved it 556

Five bucks

By DreamZ - 24/05/2024 20:00 - Canada

Today, I walked into work feeling confident in my new outfit. It wasn’t until lunchtime that a colleague pointed out the price tag hanging from my skirt. I’d been flaunting my ass's price all morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 210

You deserved it 368

AI is going to destroy us all

By AI hates me - 28/05/2024 17:00 - United States

Today, I was messing with an AI art generator. As luck would have it, it generated a nasty NSFW image just as my mom happened to walk by, despite my prompt being 100% innocent. It was also just after I got a nice, wholesome result, so I was smiling at the screen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 199

You deserved it 480

You idiot!

By Anonymous - 02/06/2024 13:00 - United States - Wentzville

Today, I delivered a bottle of alcohol to my crush, since I finished her bottle a few nights ago. Turns out, they'd caught my friend and I talking about giving her backshots on their Ring doorbell footage. She brought it up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 100

You deserved it 751

Alexa, play 'Communication Breakdown' by Led Zeppelin

By Anonymous - 08/08/2020 17:02

Today, my man complained that I was "not easily approachable", sexually speaking. To clarify, his usual way of signalling his desire is to just lie there, quiet and not moving, and (probably) thinking exciting thoughts. I can't tell if he likes me touching him, unless he signals a lack of interest by falling asleep, that is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 871

You deserved it 225

Lovely

By sigh - 18/11/2019 01:00 - Singapore - Singapore

Today, my parents forgot it was my birthday. They ordered me to scrub the common bathroom, and when I asked if they'd remembered, my dad's reaction was, "Oh! Really?" My mom's was, "I thought that it was next week." What lovely parents I have. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 362

You deserved it 203

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The Top

Today, after spending 6 hours straight working on a project at school, I decided to call it a night. The instant I set foot out of the lab, the building started screaming. The maintenance guy had set the alarm without telling me. The police had to let me out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 027

You deserved it 264

Today, my man complained about having to listen to my "emotional problems for hours." Yeah, we did talk for two hours, 90% of which was him asking for my advice on which new mattress to buy for his bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 980

You deserved it 146

Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend of 4 years in front of the sell-out crowd at the baseball game, but at the security checkpoint, the security guard made me take the ring out and open it after I walked through the metal detector. No need to say it, worst proposal ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 009

You deserved it 1 907

Today, my girlfriend was flummoxed as to why someone named Renny would be texting her at 1 a.m. Funny, because she used to have “Renny” tattooed on her ass when we met. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 202

You deserved it 194

Today, it was my first day of work, and I was wondering why everyone was staring and laughing at me. I looked down and I realized that the fly on my jeans was open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 955

You deserved it 492

Today, my mother snapped and took her frustrations out on me. Whenever she has a problem with other family members, it falls on me because she can't show them her true face to them. And she wonders why I hide away all the time… FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 019

You deserved it 106