Miscellaneous: Today, I asked my dad if he could fix my bed. It had been squeaking...

By Noname - 24/02/2009 18:13 - United States

Today, I asked my dad if he could fix my bed. It had been squeaking for some time. He shook his head no. He then continued with, "Your bed is a security system and as far as I can tell, you haven't gotten any in weeks". FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 678

You deserved it 5 271

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By anonymous - 22/09/2010 05:38 - United States

Today, my dad gave me a twenty minute lecture about responsibility and how lazy he considers me to be. He then yelled at me for not making his bed and getting his clothes off the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 900

You deserved it 2 544

Enough!

By pissed off - 02/07/2014 21:52 - United Kingdom - Milton Keynes

Today, my dad finished installing our new home security system. One of the features lets him control any light in the house from his phone. He keeps trying to piss me off by turning my bedroom light on at random intervals. I don't know how to make it stop, and I can't sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 871

You deserved it 4 959

Neglect

By Very caring parents - 26/02/2024 05:00 - United States

Today, I'm staying at my parents' house. I was woken up by the fan in my bedroom falling down. I calmly picked it back up and went to bed, wondering why my parents weren't concerned at all. My mom said she figured it was nothing, and when my dad tried to say something, she retorted, "You didn't even wake up!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 366

You deserved it 94

By Rapunzel - 18/03/2012 20:02 - United States - Tucson

Today, I watched as my step-dad put locks on my window, because he's convinced that I've been sneaking out at night. All my mom did was casually remark that I'm fucked if there's ever a fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 112

You deserved it 3 064

Just go already!

By i…… - 07/11/2022 14:00

Today, I told my dad to go to the doctor, as he’s been hacking his lungs up every minute for a month, and I've not had a decent night’s sleep since then. He insists he’s not sick, and my mom yelled at me because she sleeps in the same room and is able to sleep through it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 852

You deserved it 76

Impatience

By Anonymous - 15/05/2020 02:00

Today, my dad asked me to help him buy a laptop by searching online. He explicitly said, "When you have time." I decided to shower as I had just woken up. While showering, I was startled by loud banging and my dad angrily asking why I wasn't looking for his laptop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 744

You deserved it 136

Spooky!

By Anonymous - 16/01/2015 16:22 - Australia - Sydney

Today, my dad was fixing my wardrobe and pushed too hard, causing stuff to fall from the top shelves. I saw it happen with my own eyes, but he's dead-set convinced that it was some kind of poltergeist fucking with him, and now he doesn't want me to go in my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 060

You deserved it 2 354

By emperor - 21/07/2009 05:38 - Bangladesh

Today, I woke up screaming. Why? Well, I was complaining to my dad yesterday about how I always hit the snooze button and just roll over when my alarm goes off, and how that results in me being late for morning classes. My dad thought he'd help out by placing a mousetrap on the snooze button. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 487

You deserved it 30 656

His house, his rules?

By kikajsns - 29/04/2021 07:59

Today, it’s been a week since my dad has decided I’m only allowed to sleep with my door open. Guess how long it’s been since I’ve slept. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 019

You deserved it 107

By FirehouseShowersAreGross - 05/07/2019 00:00

Today, I’m showering at a local firehouse. Why? Because our shower is broken and my dad refuses to fix it, or get someone to fix it for us. It’s been a year and a half since I've showered in my own home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 895

You deserved it 170

bobdole 0

Tuesday 24 February 2009 23:08

i want to meet your dad. hilariousss!!!

wishfulamanda 0

Tuesday 24 February 2009 23:55

haha sorry that sucks, but its halarious

Comments

bobdole 0

Tuesday 24 February 2009 23:08

i want to meet your dad. hilariousss!!!

woojun 0

Sunday 24 January 2010 16:52

D4ni3l96 5

Sunday 16 May 2010 2:41

hello

Metzler31 17

Friday 9 July 2010 16:24

risako 7

Thursday 21 April 2011 2:37

hey

69_jackson_69 0

Saturday 18 June 2011 1:12

C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER!!!

HideouslyHuman 10

Sunday 25 September 2011 0:38

C-C-C-COMBO STARTER!

okaypineapple 0

Tuesday 24 February 2009 23:31

Dude not cool! Your dad sucks, man.

wishfulamanda 0

Tuesday 24 February 2009 23:55

haha sorry that sucks, but its halarious

Pudgygrunt 0

Wednesday 25 February 2009 0:15

you COULD try W-D 40. if you know where it is, how to get it, how to use it. or someone who can. But just do it when they arent home! ;) or somewhere else, eh?

suckerz 0

Wednesday 25 February 2009 0:28

your dad is the best lmao

ilawlzatyou 0

Wednesday 25 February 2009 0:57

haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

genius_man16 0

Wednesday 25 February 2009 0:59

lol, that's the most hilarious thing i have ever heard. You could, you know, fix the bed yourself no? It's not that hard. Like #8 said, get some WD-40 and lube that son of a gun up (the bed now you pervs)