michellemoyah
United States
Today, I went to a dance with the boy I like. To my delight, he tried to pick me up. To my dismay, he couldn't. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
United States
The Lady in Red
Today, I was at a party. The music changed to a slow dance. Everybody grabbed a partner and I was left on the dancefloor alone. Suddenly, this guy walked up to me. I swore that he was going to ask me to dance. He then said, "Could you hold me my drink?" and went to dance with another girl. FML
Anonymous
Salem, United States
Today, a guy I like asked me to a dance. Trying to act modest and at the same time compliment him, I told him, "You could do so much better, though." After thinking for a moment, he replied, "You're right, I could. Never mind," and walked away. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, I went to my Homecoming dance. I had a great time until some fat girl kept trying to dance with my date, even though he politely asked her to stop. I decided to intervene. I found myself pinned to the floor by a fat girl crushing on my date, who was cheering her on as she tackled me. FML
kylie
Canada
Today, my boyfriend and I were in my backyard goofing around when he tried to pick me up. He couldn't. I jokingly tried to lift him. I did so without much effort. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, I was at my senior dance dancing with this guy I really like. He was telling me how he likes a strong woman who's not afraid to make the first move. Empowered by what he said, I asked him out. He said no because he thinks girls shouldn't ask guys out. FML
poorclubgoer
United States
Rave on
Today, I decided to go to a club with my friends. I was flattered when an attractive guy started dancing with me. Later, I went to grab my money to pay for my dinner and realized while dancing, the very sneaky man pulled my forty dollars out of my pocket. FML
IcantDance!
Daphne, United States
Today, although I can't dance, I decided to go to a club. A really cute girl asked me to dance, and I politely declined. She kept insisting, so I finally said okay. A few minutes in, she stopped, looked at me, and said, "If you're going to make fun of my dancing, I'm leaving." FML
Anonymous
Doncaster, United Kingdom
Mixed signals, mixed results
Today, the guy I'm in love with invited me out to a gig with him and his friends, only to then try to set me up with his friend. FML
Anonymous
Neustadt, Canada
Today, I went to a dance and saw a really cute guy. Glow sticks were everywhere, so trying to be cute, I took a broken one and dripped some of the glowing liquid on my chest. It made him notice me, but only for him to point out that I'd managed to cut myself and was bleeding badly. FML
clumsy
This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff
Murfreesboro, United States
Nice try
Today, I tried to "trip" and fall into this guy I've had a crush on. I missed and fell on my face. He stepped over me and kept walking. FML
Top comments
ambowew 7
I like 'em round, I like 'em chunky.
jerseyboy732 16
someone didn't eat his wheaties
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Comments (89)
ambowew 7
I like 'em round, I like 'em chunky.
RawEndo 1
u should rip her friend a new one
fireice22 0
Cookies? It would explain the problem.
K_kanaka 26
Don't worry OP may be he's just really really weak...hopefully.
deviable 9
Cookies don't cause problems, they solve them!
j_cat187 20
Chunky monkey!
studdmuffin1990 7
That's the second time today that I liked a comment and it turned to 69 lol
KeyboardWarrior 10
56 Is the number 69 really that funny?
sickjairo 7
The name so nice you say it twice Moto Moto
ohxdamnxkay02 12
He couldn't pick you up because you are fat, your fat because he couldnt pick you up..... I failed.
RawEndo 1
tell him to do some push ups
tttt122345 0
Since when do push ups help you carry people?
stevenJB 25
Back and bicep muscles help you here...and legs obviously
jerseyboy732 16
someone didn't eat his wheaties
fireice22 0
Maybe because she finished it all.
Superstitious 6
'Cos you gotta watch out for the calories in those Wheaties...
CheckItOutItsYou 7
Hmm, are you to heavy or is he to weak?
narrowords 18
*too (x two). EVERYONE'S THINKING IT, might as well write it...
CheckItOutItsYou 7
I know right
dhardesty23 8
don't let it get you down. maybe he has a bad tendon or sprained his shoulder the day before...or maybe he's just weak
smileypoop 2
how could it get her down if she couldn't even get up?? :D
CaliGali 9
Sounds like you both could use some working out
GoW_Chick 15
...or he could use some working out.
Furrywhiplash 14
...or he can stop fooling around and absorb android #18 already and achieve his perfect form. Then hold a tournament to decide the fate of Earth. (sorry, I've been watching dbz lately..... I have no life, don't worry, I know.)
ZooMzy 9
28- I don't see a problem. I couldn't lift up my girlfriend before I achieved my perfect form. Now that I have absorbed Android 18, I can twirl her around with both hands tied behind my back.
CryMoreFMLs 15
30 - Which limb are you using then?
ZooMzy 9
42- Exactly.
GoW_Chick 15
Now time for some awkward conversations around the punch bowl!
perdix 31
Why did this comment get so many thumbs down? It's quite good! Please judge a comment on its content, not who wrote it. If you have a problem with GoW_chick, deal with it some other way than keeping the rest of us from seeing her work. My suggestion is that you skip over her comments and don't let your hatred of her corrode your soul. The rest of us want to see what she has to say.
l0v3p4in 7
Who doesn't like GoW_Chick? Her comments are cute, fun, and quite innovative. Perdix, I think your defense of her made enough people thumbs up all the thumbs down. Good work. ;)
TuLegit 4
Agreed
thisisafunnyname 12
I thumbed up her comment before I read Perdix's comment. Cause I'm a fearless ******* savage
Savra_fml 17
Do, or do not. There is no "try" - Yoda. As a subtle hint, suggest he watch the movie "pumping iron". Unless of course, his strength is not the problem. FYL either way.
tygerarmy 35
At least the boy you like likes you. Exercise and practice will help.
ICATiger 13
You need to put your back into it boy!!! And bend your knees!