Today, a first date with a guy went so badly that he actually paid me to never call him again. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I went on my first date with a guy I really like. He completely ignored me. FML
Today, I went on a date with a guy who seemed to be quite the gentleman. I was proven wrong when he told me to "shut it" during dinner, stiffed me on the bill, and then left me at the restaurant so he could get his own taxi home. FML
Joe Smooth
Today, I went on a blind date. My date spent the whole time at the restaurant on his phone and didn't even try to show interest. Thankfully I'll never have to deal with this individual ever again. FML
Bitch move
Today, I went to the movies with this guy I'd started dating. During the movie, I thought it would be cool and funny to make sarcastic comments. When he dropped me off home, he told me that it was the worst date ever and to not talk to him again for being "annoying and obnoxious." FML
Crafty
Today, I was supposed to be going on my first date with a guy I really liked. He never showed up. I just found out my dad was outside washing the car when my date showed up. He told him he didn't have a daughter and to never show up on his driveway again. FML
Today, I went on a date for the first time in ages, only to realize that the guy I was seeing chose to take us to a specific restaurant in able to stalk his ex. FML
Today, my date made me pay him for picking me up, and taking me back home. FML
Creeped out of here
Today, I went on my first date in six years. The guy was unbelievably creepy, and I couldn't wait for it to be over. Right after we finished eating, he told me he loved me, then tried to lean in for a kiss. He looked like he was going to cry when I turned him down. FML
Today, I was on a first date. When the bill came, he refused to pay for my $6 salad. I had to go ATM-hunting to pay for my $6 salad. FML
Today, after weeks of being hounded to go out on a date with this guy, I finally found the time and invited him over, fully intending to hook up. He stood me up. FML
Top comments
dumboears 8
Look on the bright side, you can make a business out of this!
Pelreskovich 11
How much? Either way free money is free money! Just keep trying!
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Comments (166)
dumboears 8
Look on the bright side, you can make a business out of this!
Bball_boy15 3
You deserve better OP
smartypants96 3
Don't take it personal OP, you'll find someone who deserves you. (:
melchibr_fml 0
Just know that if you ask me out that I don't pay with money. If you know what I mean.
HeartnSoul 3
YDI for being gay OP
HeartnSoul 3
YDI for being what you are
Fmeonce_shameonu 15
40. You do understand OP is a homosexual male...right?
davidbdb485 0
#78 you do understand that the OP's sexual orientation has nothing to do with 40's comment, right? It's a joke, the OP being homosexual doesn't matter.
Fmeonce_shameonu 15
83. I really don't think you're correct. I believe he thought OP was a female. We can settle this 1v1 CoD to determine who is correct.
bamagrl410 31
Who cares what OP's orientation is? It was just a joke...
Fmeonce_shameonu 15
I don't think anyone cares he is gay. They shouldn't. Go gators!
RadikulRam 16
#78 your comment does not make sense, women are not the only gender who can substitute paying for a date with sex. 2) I think OP is homosexual, I've come to this conclusion because OP has specified its gender as male, and has name its self Lonely Gay, although it is possible that OP gave the wrong answer for the gender option. " by Lonely Gay (man) " #83 was spot on. #95 I think OP is a male as mentioned above, and because OP have specified their gender as male.
urdirtyolduncle 15
105- Your pic seems like kinky masturbation gone wrong.
Fmeonce_shameonu 15
111. Bare with me. We know OP enjoys dick, there is no doubt to that. The guy who made the joke about paying with sexual favor instead of money, was indeed making a joke. I believe he made that joke with the intention that the OP was a female. So here's where I'm going with this. When he posted that joke, he was being sexual, towards what he thought was a female. I don't think he would have made that joke unless he himself is also gay or knew the OP was a male. The writing is on the wall, literally. My first post does make sense. Read the OP. Read his. Then read mine. It might click second time around. And I don't have anything against gays. My buddy from high school came out, and he is still my buddy.
Fmeonce_shameonu 15
113. It was an epic fail
CRC_101 31
Femeonce Shameonu - I'm highly curious as to why you would point this out in the first place. Do you have a particular obsession with correcting people's misperceptions? I agree that your interpretation of melchibr's comment is the most likely, although only they could say for sure. However, why did you think this worth pointing out? If you have any perception of the world, which it seems you do, you should have realized it would cause an uproar. Mainly, if melchibr's comment was a joke, as you say, they likely don't care whether OP is a homosexual male or not. Why do you?
CRC_101 31
*Fmeonce Shameonu. Do not take offense to my misspelling of your name; I couldn't edit it in time.
Fmeonce_shameonu 15
I dont take offense to typos. No worries. I was just pointing it out to him. Lets use a real world situation. Say two guys are at a bar. One guy starts hitting it off with a girl. The other guy puts together that the the girl his buddy is hitting on, is actually a transvestite, post-op of course. It is his friends duty at that time to save his friend from doing something he maybe didn't want to actually do, knowing in reality the chick was once a guy ( I would hope my friend would save me in this situation at least, majority of guys would). I know it's not an identical situation, but the reference is there. I was just saying to this guy who made the joke, that he his hitting on a tranny (or gay guy in this instance) and didn't know it. I was just being the friend at the bar.
RadikulRam 16
#114 if you're talking to someone in a public forum then it'll help if you could type in their comment number like I do or their username. Otherwise people will assume you're making an individual comment by commenting on #1 to get your comment noticed.
Fmeonce_shameonu 15
####137**** sorry broseph. Didn't know there were rules. Don't think anyone was confused though. Thank you for your genuine concern. Rest easy tonight mi amigo.
Havin 19
#140 I think I love you
Fmeonce_shameonu 15
I'm genuinely flattered. Thank you for the first compliment I've ever gotten on here :) A lot of these people heavily dislike me lol
legit0817 4
I'd 1v1 MW3 & win so bad it wouldn't even be funny. & Who care's wbat OP is.
loserman67 36
WOW, that's a first. This should be in the running for FML of the year!
melchibr_fml 0
Forever A Loan. ;(...
markrs 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Bad sex?
slick5880 22
Don't think it got that far.
Pelreskovich 11
How much? Either way free money is free money! Just keep trying!
melchibr_fml 0
It wasn't free money. She had to suffer through one of the worst dates ever to get payment.
Pelreskovich 11
He* ..and you don't know that it wasn't partially OP's fault.
melchibr_fml 0
Well, I was assuming that if someone you were dating was having a shitty time, that you yourself wouldn't enjoy the date. You've got a point though.
thiscrazything 1
Suffering through a bad date is no fun, but at least she got paid. Could have been a lot worse. Better luck next time, OP.
cradle6 13
He*
Pelreskovich 11
HE* it was two guys.
Pelreskovich 11
Or the sex distinction in the upper right corner, many FMLs have it.
thiscrazything 1
Ok, damn, don't feed me to the wolves, I'm sorry, I didn't read the user name. Ok, that makes the FML a little bit worse, still, better luck next time, OP. Everyone else please excuse me for my erroneous ways.
Havin 19
#118 just read your profile, I'm a ***** too! Now watch the judgmental comments roll in
Pelreskovich 11
I'm a *****..?
baseballplaya5 7
At least you got a free dinner.
amberbby69 6
And spending money!
Doortje 30
Who says it was a free dinner?
Mearemoi 14
What's so bad? Free money! How much did he give you?
DrMime 10
69 dollars??
SaMmIMonster96 6
Oh, DrMime your humor gets me every time *sighs*
jerseyboy732 16
try e-harmony
LaughinStock 16
**** e-harmony come to Chicago Op..I'll take you to Boys Town
ShroomsOnAcid 17
Even if you're not gay, Boystown is great for people watching. I have a hard time keeping my eyes on the road when I pass through there, because there's always something interesting happening in my peripherals.
crimsonprodigy 15
OP needs to visit Bankok, with a drug dealing friend ;)
yahoowizard 16
That costs money while OP is making it. Stick to the original plan
emvictoria 9
Don't stress, there's plenty of fish in the sea :) this one was clearly not worth it!!
chili_is_good 0
No there's not, BP killed them all
tilltheendoftime 0
It was worth it, she got paid.
PlaySpades 21
The OP is a guy
electrorange 13
As long as you don't feed the fish mashed potatoes!!
SeemsToFail 0
Did you keep the money I wouldve felt so awkward
Pentium_4 27
might as well...
HolaJessicaHola 0
Ehh, at least you know he's not the one for you AND you got some money. I say win win situation.
WCARlover 35
I imagine if it went that badly then you wouldn't have called him again, anyway. I'm sure it wasn't all you.
draegbomb 5
It was obviously all her fault...