Love: Today, a first date with a guy went so badly that he actually... - FML

By Lonely Gay - 22/02/2012 09:37 - United States

Today, a first date with a guy went so badly that he actually paid me to never call him again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 494

You deserved it 5 389

May Day: Lily of the Valley and Misunderstandings
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Same thing different taste

By crapcrapcrap - 14/03/2010 07:00 - United States

Today, I went on my first date with a guy I really like. He completely ignored me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 139

You deserved it 4 772

By OhDear - 24/02/2011 20:03 - United Kingdom

Today, I went on a date with a guy who seemed to be quite the gentleman. I was proven wrong when he told me to "shut it" during dinner, stiffed me on the bill, and then left me at the restaurant so he could get his own taxi home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 833

You deserved it 5 084

Joe Smooth

By Anonymous - 09/01/2022 04:59 - United States - West Covina

Today, I went on a blind date. My date spent the whole time at the restaurant on his phone and didn't even try to show interest. Thankfully I'll never have to deal with this individual ever again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 068

You deserved it 130

Bitch move

By Ineedtoshutup - 19/08/2021 16:01

Today, I went to the movies with this guy I'd started dating. During the movie, I thought it would be cool and funny to make sarcastic comments. When he dropped me off home, he told me that it was the worst date ever and to not talk to him again for being "annoying and obnoxious." FML

I agree, your life sucks 243

You deserved it 2 246

Crafty

By Anonymous - 07/08/2010 23:41 - United States

Today, I was supposed to be going on my first date with a guy I really liked. He never showed up. I just found out my dad was outside washing the car when my date showed up. He told him he didn't have a daughter and to never show up on his driveway again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 499

You deserved it 3 204

By Anonyme - 06/04/2019 02:00

Today, I went on a date for the first time in ages, only to realize that the guy I was seeing chose to take us to a specific restaurant in able to stalk his ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 307

You deserved it 152

By bad date - 13/06/2012 04:42 - United States - Bennet

Today, my date made me pay him for picking me up, and taking me back home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 363

You deserved it 3 725

By Anonymous - 28/11/2015 05:25 - United States

Today, I went on my first date in six years. The guy was unbelievably creepy, and I couldn't wait for it to be over. Right after we finished eating, he told me he loved me, then tried to lean in for a kiss. He looked like he was going to cry when I turned him down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 963

You deserved it 1 966

By wolfwolfy - 13/03/2010 07:18 - Canada

Today, I was on a first date. When the bill came, he refused to pay for my $6 salad. I had to go ATM-hunting to pay for my $6 salad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 079

You deserved it 13 298

By Anonymous - 12/05/2019 02:00

Today, after weeks of being hounded to go out on a date with this guy, I finally found the time and invited him over, fully intending to hook up. He stood me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 760

You deserved it 465

Next

Top comments

dumboears 8

Wednesday 22 February 2012 15:56

Look on the bright side, you can make a business out of this!

Pelreskovich 11

Wednesday 22 February 2012 15:59

How much? Either way free money is free money! Just keep trying!

Comments

jeremy4719 0

Wednesday 22 February 2012 18:58

How ugly are you???

chels1994 11

Wednesday 22 February 2012 19:33

Ya know, some people don't want to date others because of their personality...not looks :)

ImSoEffedUp 10

Wednesday 22 February 2012 19:05

Wow, that had to be a TERRIBLE date... He PAID u not to call him again, that means he's not even gonna bother trying to sleep with u on one of those drunk, lonely nights....

idontknowanythin_fml 5

Wednesday 22 February 2012 19:07

he didn't deserve you. But you got money so....

youliia 0

Wednesday 22 February 2012 19:19

This makes me want to know what you Did that made him pay you..

pagullarka 9

Wednesday 22 February 2012 19:23

Do people usually pay you to do stuff

Dcm210 19

Wednesday 22 February 2012 19:24

what did you do

Sumo69 9

Wednesday 22 February 2012 19:43

You've created a new paying profession.

gizmo62_fml 1

Wednesday 22 February 2012 19:46

what an ass

luvstrckprncss 5

Wednesday 22 February 2012 19:47

I wouldn't be complaining. Free moneyyy

nabila21 0

Wednesday 22 February 2012 19:58

I only have 3 REAL friends(counting Ben the REAL invisible flying moose). You have a better life than me. And I'm 11. Enjoy your life while you can.

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Keywords

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The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, when his condom came off inside of me. We couldn't get it out, so I had to tell my mom, who didn't know we were sexually active, and then go to the ER. After an unsuccessful visit, we came home only to find the condom in my sheets. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 242

You deserved it 37 869

Today, I took my hoodie off in public and my shirt accidentally lifted up with it. I've had bad skin problems since I was 12 or 13, and my chest looks horrific as a result. Everyone in my vicinity reacted with horror and called me all sorts of awful names. Nice to know that my appearance makes me that repulsive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 569

You deserved it 89

The Top

Today, I learned that all the caffeine my body can handle and boundless energy will not stop me from yawning. Thirty times in an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 557

You deserved it 131

Today, my doctor said I "might" have an enlarged heart and an irregular heartbeat. It "could" be seriously life-threatening and I "should" go to a specialist for further tests. My insurance refuses to cover my consultation with the specialist because the doctor's wording is too uncertain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 434

You deserved it 1 289

Today, I was vomiting after an evening of drinking. My boyfriend was kind enough to hold my hair back while I spewed chunks into the toilet. Apparently he got bored though, because his hands made their way down to my boobs, which he started jiggling while singing Jingle Bells. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 931

You deserved it 29 655

Today, I was babysitting a 5 year old boy. When I was on the phone with my mom, he called 911 and started to cry. When I got off the phone the police were at the door. It turns out that the "emergency" was that the VCR was not working. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 184

You deserved it 9 727

Today, it's been a week since my husband woke up with what the hospital says is transient amnesia. He’s lost about 15 years of memories and thinks he’s in his 20’s. We’ve only been married 5 years, and dated 3 years before that, so he has no idea who I am, has no idea his parents are dead, or who our son is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 700

You deserved it 83

Today, my boyfriend and I were discussing sports injuries, and I mentioned that I pulled a muscle in my crotch last year. He snorted and called me a clueless idiot because according to him, "girls don't have crotches". He's a med student. I sense malpractice lawsuits in our future. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 334

You deserved it 4 023