By Anonymous - 19/6/2021 19:01 - United States - Los Angeles

Workers of the world unite

Today, the day before I was supposed to go back to work after I got sick, ended up in the hospital, and primary doctor put me on medical leave, I got fired. FML

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Work

Health

You're fired

Capitalism

Walk on the wild side

Broken heart

Surrounded

By Yudor - France

Today, my girlfriend told me that she woke up after yesterday’s party with someone else’s trousers. FML

I agree, your life sucks

26394

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2417

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By BulldogHoops - United States - Broken Arrow

Today, I decided to buy a meal for a homeless man who was being shunned at an intersection. When I went to hand it to him, I realized it was my dad, wearing a tattered old shirt and pretending to be homeless to make some money. FML

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38273

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2421

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By mszoe - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was checking the family's computer history, and found that "Shrek Porn" had been searched multiple times. FML

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33089

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By TuT - France

Today, I found my husband in the bathtub, which was filled with blood-red water, motionless and staring blankly at the ceiling. I started screaming and crying, and he burst into laughter at his "hilarious" prank. He only seemed regretful that his video camera hadn't been recording properly. FML

I agree, your life sucks

41894

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4155

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By unhappyelf - United States

Today, my boss insisted that we get in the holiday mood by putting up lights, playing Christmas music, and wearing bells on our uniforms. It's not even Thanksgiving yet and I can't even have a tinkle without full-blown jingling. FML

I agree, your life sucks

24838

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2716

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By Laura

Today, I caught my daughter attempting to stick pencils up our cat's butt. FML

I agree, your life sucks

43956

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5355

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By lol123 - Norway

Today, it was the premiere of a huge play I've worked on for months. The latest week we've practised a lot, resulting in little sleep. In one of the scenes I'm just lying there pretending to be asleep. Guess who actually fell asleep? FML

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48639

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10435

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By Anonymous - Canada - Winnipeg

Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He replied by telling me to fuck off. FML

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27570

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3453

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By sm702 - United States

Today, I took my mom to Victoria's Secret to help her find a bra. She made me try one on to see if it looked good on me. Turns out we have the same cup size. I'm a guy. FML

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23426

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52239

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By Anonymous - United States

Today, someone came into the store I work at, laughed at my name on my name-tag, and left without even buying anything. FML

I agree, your life sucks

41697

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3925

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By Satan's Mum - United Kingdom - London

Today, to teach my 14-year-old son a serious lesson for bullying a child at school again, I grounded him for the rest of the year. He just snorted and said, "Cool, I'll just jack off all year then! Thanks, mum!" and happily retreated to his bedroom. FML

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48503

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9085

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By Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, my dad started his mid-life crisis. Instead of a Porsche or a Ferrari, he bought a tractor. Goodbye summer holiday. FML

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23614

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2394

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By inboxbuddies - Saudi Arabia

Today, my daughter asked me if we can make sticker art. Of course I said it was ok so she went to get some stickers. I wondered where she was going when she walked into the bathroom, but I didn't ask. I left the room and when I came back, her paper was blank and my pads were stuck to the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks

40445

You deserved it

5934

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By Anonymous - United States

Today, I was walking along when I saw this girl kissing her boyfriend. I thought to myself "I wish I had a boyfriend like that". I'm a guy, and straight. At least I thought I was. FML

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39268

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14301

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By poopsthegame - United States - Honolulu

Today, I walked out of my apartment to see that someone had climbed onto the hood of my car and taken a shit on my windshield. I only moved in a couple of weeks ago. FML

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25905

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1815

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By Anonymous - 30/6/2021 16:01

Kinda heartless, but OK

Today, it’s been almost a month and a half of no intimacy between my boyfriend and me. To spice things up, I started going down on him. He burst out crying after a couple of minutes because he "misses his sister." The funeral was nearly 2 months ago already. FML

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344

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2332

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By ForeverLost

Together, forever

Today, my wife asked me for a divorce, shortly after I found out she's been having an affair. Then our county placed us on quarantine for Covid-19. Now I'm stuck living with her until it goes away. FML

I agree, your life sucks

2291

You deserved it

132

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By purpledp12 - United States

Today, I was eating in the food court at the mall by myself but then a cute guy from my school offers to sit by me, I say yes of course, he then asks me for a french fry. Later on I realize he has eaten half my meal. He only wanted to sit by me for my food. FML

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29390

You deserved it

6829

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By Anonymous - 7/8/2020 17:01

Like a virgin

Today, at 26, I bought my first vibrator. I've never really masturbated before, because I've always been with a guy. I used it for the first time, and orgasmed in under 3 minutes. I guess this whole time the guys I've been with hadn’t in fact made me cum as much as I thought. FML

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1593

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426

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By LetItRip - Czech Republic - Prague

Today, I nailed every single move in my routine at a gymnastics competition. I then finished off with a perfect split, letting out a fart loud enough to wake up a kid in China. FML

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39464

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By Anonymous

Fear factor

Today, at about 3:30 a.m. I awoke to the feeling of something dropping on my head. Startled, I turned on the light. It was a gigantic cockroach. I thought I'd killed it, but when I went to collect the body it was gone. I'm too scared to sleep. Even my dog now refuses to be in the bedroom. FML

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1630

You deserved it

153

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By Anonymous - United States

Today, I was at the airport to catch a plane. It was very crowded at the gate and there was nowhere to sit except for a flat metal bench, so I sat on that. Turns out I was sitting on a luggage scale, so my weight was displayed for everybody to see. FML

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20223

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By MasterMcrib - United States - Highland Park

Today, while walking down the street I thought it would be funny to moon a crowd of old people taking a photo, in a few seconds a couple of them started pointing in my direction... Turns out they were pointing at the car that ran me over shortly after. FML

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7809

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By ihasnoafroanymore

Today, I was working at my job at a McDonald's. I was on my break, so I went to use the restroom. When I finished, I tried to open the door, but the lock broke. I was stuck in the basement bathroom for 20 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1632

You deserved it

140

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By Thongy - Canada

Cultural differences

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. Why? My Australian friend sent me a message saying I'd left my thongs at his house. My boyfriend still refuses to believe that they call flip-flops thongs in Australia. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1960

You deserved it

539

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By afraidtosleep - United States - Houston

Today, as I was rushing to get out for work, I opened my door just in time to witness a large snake slither into my home. I had no choice but to lock it inside and go to work. I've now spent several hours searching for it with my friends, and we can't find it. I'm scared to go to sleep. FML

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28887

You deserved it

6306

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By boyfriendisatoss - Australia

Today, I had two surprises for my boyfriend who was at work. One was a dessert and the other was sexy lingerie. He chose the dessert. Then told me I was an idiot. FML

I agree, your life sucks

23356

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5066

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By PoachedFish - Lebanon

Today, was very chilly. My little sister felt sorry for my two goldfish swimming in the cold water. She decided to put them in hot water. They died. FML

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34253

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3042

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By shorty - United States

Today, I told my mom I was going through a growth spurt. She said "Yeah, horizontally." FML

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34698

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6943

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By notadoorman - United States - Elmont

Today, I held the door open for a woman and her kids on my way out of the bank. She started accusing me of patronizing her, and when I just let go of the door in protest, she deliberately leaned in so it hit her in the face. I felt the glares from the entire bank as she pretended to cry. FML

I agree, your life sucks

51029

You deserved it

4001

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By AndyAnonymous - United States

Today, I brought several bags of soda cans to the store to cash in. I hadn't shaved, and my coat had fur all over from my cat rubbing on it. The lady in front of me turned around, looked at my bags and me and said, "It's a lot of money people throw away, isn't it?" Apparently, I look homeless. FML

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12768

You deserved it

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By damn - Australia - Sydney

Today, I had a fight with my boyfriend over a girl he is close to. He later arrived with flowers for what I thought was an apology. He was actually breaking up with me; the flowers were for her, he just didn't want to leave them in the car. FML

I agree, your life sucks

31041

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7305

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By kinky pinky - 2/9/2020 05:02 - United States

Lowkey

Today, my husband threw a fit because I dyed my hair bright magenta. Funny, I actually dyed it three days ago. He literally just noticed. Shows how much attention he pays me. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1659

You deserved it

223

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By wwasmer - United States

Today, I hit a car while trying to answer a phone call from my mom. I quickly answered the phone and shouted "What!?". To which she replied, "I just had a bad feeling in my gut about you so I wanted to make sure you were ok." FML

I agree, your life sucks

50779

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By jaymaag25 - United States - Saint Joseph

Today, it seems like everyone in my family knew about my boyfriend's new engagement, all except me. FML

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12074

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930

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By thegoldenboy3 - Spain

Today, I'm in Spain, and told the kids with whom I will be working that I was excited to be working with them. Only the form of excitement I used apparently refers to sexual excitement. Basically, I told the kids I was sexually aroused to be working with them. FML

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49136

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By Anonymous - 27/7/2021 07:02

Grow up

Today, my son rejected a job offer because it interferes with the streaming schedule of some Twitch dirtbag. He's 19. FML

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731

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By dykerino - Canada - Vancouver

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because I cut my hair short and he didn't want people to think he was gay. FML

I agree, your life sucks

38620

You deserved it

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By nerderer - United States - Duluth

Today, my dad decided that the best way to alleviate my crippling depression is to talk to me in a baby voice. FML

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31814

You deserved it

3323

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By Guuu - France

Today, I aimed at the little blue thing placed at the bottom of the urinal. I learned the hard way that it splashes off it and makes little blue stains on jumpers. FML

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9304

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Top comments

By bobsanction | 16

#8002502 - Sunday 20 June 2021 9:05

Lawyer up, cus that's illegal.

By Max Gahmer | 2

#8002556 - Sunday 20 June 2021 15:53

Definitely illegal.

COMMENTS

By bobsanction | 16

#8002502 - Sunday 20 June 2021 9:05

Lawyer up, cus that's illegal.

By Max Gahmer | 2

#8002556 - Sunday 20 June 2021 15:53

Definitely illegal.

By Chazzster | 21

#8002595 - Sunday 20 June 2021 18:41

California has specific laws to protect workers who get sick or injured. There are exceptions, but you need to find out how the law applies to you and your situation.

By Regis Bent | 11

#8002618 - Sunday 20 June 2021 21:22

You might be screwed because you got injured before you started working at the place, but you could try and fight it

By DeuceLoL | 2

#8002619 - Sunday 20 June 2021 21:39

If you were in FMLA from the job that is something that is meant to protect your job from something like this. I encourage getting in touch with your HR department.