By one cock too many - 04/08/2020 05:02
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It's hard to tell what specifically happened from a 240 character blurb. We don't know if she was doing adult films while they dated, or if she had stopped and had a change of heart, and was trying to put things straight in her life. Still, this is a major thing to keep hidden and lie about. Moreover, if she was filming adult films while they were dating, it's a pretty strong betrayal on top of the lies. I guess you have to examine your feelings and the situation and decide 1. if you still want to be in the relationship at all, and 2. if you think you can get by the issues and come to trust your wife again. If you think you can, I'd definitely get some counseling (individually and as a couple, because you need to work through some of it on your own too.) If you're not okay with it, and especially if it was going on while you were together, that's a legitimate reason to get divorced.
In addition to what the other people said, she probably also wanted to protect you. She didn’t want to “bring” anything from work to you. It’s great that she waited until she was absolutely sure she was STD free - ie your wedding night, with her porn life behind her - before she did anything with you. Although on the other hand, it does suck that she was apparently doing this while dating you. But she tried to protect you, and that’s something, and it seems like you’re happily married now, and that’s great :)
Does she give good head? Then STFU and enjoy her wealth of experience. Just accept the fact that you're probably not the biggest dick she's ever had... unless we're defining dick the other way, then maybe you are. Seriously, get over yourself. I think this is more a FHL for having to put up with your bruised ego.
You might be able to get past it? You sound extremely judgemental.
Normally I'd agree if it was "Hey honey before we got together I was a porn star" sure get the hell over it dude. And any guy going "maybe I can get past it" would sound pretty judgmental. But this is him finding out that while they were actively dating she was having sex with all of these other guys. We live in a society that defines that as cheating and has raised him to equate that with cheating. It's understandable that he'd have to re-evaluate his feelings on the matter. And so you don't think I'm judgmental personally it's in the past it's not followed up with "and we're doing a reunion movie" then I'd move past it. I wouldn't hold it against someone that had issues doing so though.
Wow... I am usually an extremely open minded guy and, in fact, I am poly amorous. However, I would feel humiliated and betrayed by this. Basically she was being dishonest with you when you were dating and living a lie. My experience is that we try to see the best in the ones we love and you probably thought she was Ms Purity herself at the time. Knowing that she was having all sorts of crazy sex behindy back while I thought that about her would kill me.